Kukachi
by neo-chan
Summary: [now revised] It wasn't like I expected it to happen. But that's how it always is. You never know these things are coming until it's too late... [Taito]
1. Good Mornings

A/N: This is the beginning of my revised version (second revised version, really) of Kukachi. I would love to change the name of this, but I guess I won't mess with some things. I have, however, changed a few major-ish things about this fic so beware of that. I had to revise it because I'm re-writing Yesterday's Feelings too in order for me to continue with it and, well... I just wasn't happy with this either anymore.

By the way, I treat all of my fics as if the characters are living in some sort of North American-type society (in fact, I think of the characters themselves as North Americans) so let's just say, for the sake of it, that they are.

DISCLAIMER: I don't own Digimon or rights to any of the characters, I am not making a profit from this, etc.

**Kukachi  
Prologue: "Good" Mornings  
**by: neo-chan

Looking out the window, it was a perfectly normal day. The old lady next door, Mrs. Wardler, was out on her front porch knitting as she did every morning. Three girls in school uniforms were walking down the street- getting an early start on the walk to school, I suppose. I would be leaving for school soon also.

Taking a deep breath, I fixed my tie and glanced in the mirror. As usual, I looked perfectly neat and tidy. I've been wearing a uniform for as long as I can remember, attending private schools from the moment I entered school as a child. I've never known anything else and perhaps that makes me biased, but I'm strongly in favor of uniforms in schools. I think that it helps to keep order and it also saves time in the mornings while getting ready for school.

A knock sounded at my door and I sighed inwardly, preparing myself for the day ahead; another day of being "the perfect son". It wasn't as if I despised my life-in fact, I loved my life-but sometimes I had to wonder what it would be like if I had a "normal" teenage life; the type of life where I had no worries, no cares, and absolutely no responsibility.

"Come in," I called.

The door creaked open and I turned to find my father standing in the doorway, dressed in freshly pressed tan pants and a white collared shirt with a brown tie, a tan blazer draped over his shoulder.

"Good morning, Yamato," he greeted me.

"Good morning," I responded. "How did you sleep last night?"

"Very well, how about you?"

"I slept quite well also."

"That's good." My father sounded distracted, and I found out why with his next sentence. "Yamato, I have some news for you."

"What is it?" I asked curiously.

"It might be better if you take this news sitting down."

I sat down on my bed, beginning to worry a little. What if a family member was hurt? What if someone was ill? My father seemed to notice my concern.

"Don't worry, Yamato, it's nothing **too** horrible."

"What is it?" I asked again.

"Well, before I tell you, keep in mind that your mother and I have been discussing this for quite some time. This isn't a spontaneous decision, and there are several valid reasons behind it."

I nodded impatiently, waiting for him to go on.

"...Yamato, we're moving."

**xXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx**

Moving? Alright, so it wasn't that bad; we would probably just be moving across town.

"...to Kukachi."

All I could do was stare. Kukachi? We were moving to **Kukachi**?

There was definitely reason for alarm. Kukachi is a city hours away from my own town, Rihtona- not to mention that Kukachi is known as a crime-infested, unsafe, low-class city; the exact opposite of Rihtona. Why on earth would we be moving **there**, of all places? I had such a great life in Rihtona- we all did! Most of our relatives lived nearby, not to mention close family friends, and I even had something of a girlfriend. We lived in a big, beautiful house with a rich green lawns and a garden my mother was proud of. I had several good friends at the private school I attended, some of which I'd known nearly my whole life. What reason could we possibly have to move to Kukachi?

Several long, silent moments passed and my father became visibly uncomfortable, shifting uneasily.

"Yamato?"

I was speechless. How could my parents decide such a thing?

"I've been offered a job there," my father said, trying to supply a reason as well as fill the gap of silence.

"Your job is fine!" I exclaimed.

"Yamato, it's an opportunity for you to make new friends and experience new things-"

"I like my friends, and I don't want to experience 'new things'!"

"Yamato."

That was all it took to silence me. But how could he do such a thing to me?

"What did Mom say?" I asked, so quietly that I barely heard myself.

"Your mother was the one to finalize the decision. There's no doubt about it, Yamato- we **are** moving."

**xXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx**

It was extremely difficult to inform my friends that I was moving- especially to Kukachi. I did it that very same day, the day before Christmas holidays began, and my friends' reactions were quite as I'd expected.

"You're moving in the middle of the school year?"

"Why are you leaving us? Don't go there, it's horrible over there!"

"You **can't** go!"

That last voice was my 'sort-of' girlfriend. She was on the verge of tears.

I felt terrible. "I wish I didn't have to, Maddy."

"Yamato..."

Madison threw her arms around me in a hug and I held her tightly, not wanting to let go.

"When are you leaving?" she asked shakily, tears clouding her eyes and threatening to fall.

"After the holidays," I responded reluctantly.

"At least we can have a party for you," one of my friends, Jonas, pointed out.

At that point, Madison started crying.

"You can't leave!" she sobbed. "It's not fair!"

It hurt me to see her cry, but all I could do was stand there and watch. It was horrible.

My life was completely and utterly ruined.

**xXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx**


	2. First Impressions

A/N: Yamato is sixteen in this fic and in grade eleven, by the way.

DISCLAIMER: I don't own Digimon or rights to any of the characters, I am not making a profit from this, etc.

**Kukachi  
I: First Impressions  
**by: neo-chan

The day we moved out was a very cold one, which made sense seeing as it was winter. The day was Monday January 6th, to be exact. Winter Vacation had just ended.

Mrs. Wardler was out knitting as usual and the same three girls that I saw every morning were walking down the street as usual... just as I would have liked to have been doing.

The people helping us move must have been miserable due to the weather. They were all from businesses that we'd paid to help, however, so they couldn't complain because they were getting our money. Some relatives stopped by to say a last goodbye to us, and this only reminded me that I would have no family in Kukachi. I wouldn't know anyone but my own parents. I couldn't see any good coming from the move. In fact, I was positive that my life was about to spiral downward.

My parents and I own a great deal of material goods, so we had to rent three large moving trucks for all of our things to fit. We drove in front of the three trucks to our destination, which took several hours to reach. In fact, it took so long that I was asleep for half of the ride there. We stopped a few times for a break, seeing as it took so long, and after our last stop I stayed awake for the rest of the trip and watched the rapidly changing scenery. As soon as we entered Kukachi, I noticed that it seemed darker in some way. Maybe I was being dramatic and biased, but I instantly felt as if I didn't belong- and as if we weren't safe. I hoped with all my heart that what I'd heard about Kukachi was an exaggeration.

Once again, I felt myself wondering why all of this was happening in the first place. My father wouldn't have just decided to move to Kukachi without a good reason. "Another job" wasn't a good excuse. No job in Kukachi could compare to the job he'd had in Rihtona. For us to pack up and leave, there had to be a different reason- a secret one. I could only hope that I would find out what it was.

As we neared our new home, I took in the surroundings and told myself that it was only temporary. If I believed it, maybe it would come true.

**xXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx**

The house in Kukachi was a moderate size- not nearly as large as our house had been in Rihtona. The rooms were noticeably smaller, not to mention there weren't even as many. I couldn't help but wonder how all of our things would fit in the house.

It took quite a while to finish unpacking the necessities- in fact, it took nearly the whole day. We'd sold quite a few of our possessions, for what reason I didn't know, and it just didn't seem the same without them. My mother spent most of the time deciding where everything would go. It was so strange- I was so used to the way everything had been, and to have it all suddenly change was odd and extremely disorienting.

"You'll begin attending Kukachi Secondary School tomorrow," my father informed me. "I'll drive you there, since you don't know your way yet, but make sure you take careful notice of the route because you'll have to walk home."

I wasn't even being given time to adjust before I was being thrust into school in a place I didn't know- and not just any school, but a **public** school. What had I done to deserve such a thing?

I don't know exactly what I expected of my new school the next morning. But I can tell you one thing for sure; I certainly didn't expect what I encountered, not in the least.

**xXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx**

On Tuesday morning, I woke up early to prepare for school. I wanted to make a good impression on the teachers, even though their standards were probably much lower than those of my teachers in Rihtona.

I had no idea how I was supposed to dress. I'd never been to a public school before, and I had a feeling schools in Kukachi were generally different anyway. After much debate, I found an outfit I deemed to be suitable; a white button-down collared shirt and black dress pants. This was almost like a more casual version of my uniform in Rihtona, which had consisted of khaki pants, a white dress shirt, a black tie, and a matching khaki blazer. I considered wearing a tie for some moments, but decided against it eventually. Using my usual hair products, I slicked my hair back and then pulled on a black jacket before heading downstairs.

"Well, don't you look handsome!" my mother gushed as I walked into the kitchen.

"Thank you," I said as I sat down at the table across from my father.

"Are you nervous?" my father asked, looking up from his newspaper briefly.

"Very," I responded.

My father observed my outfit and then he spoke hesitantly.

"Yamato... do you think that maybe you're a little overdressed for your new school?"

I couldn't help but stare at him. "Overdressed? What do you mean?"

"He's dressed fine, Matthew," my mother scolded him, then turned to me. "You look wonderful, honey."

"I don't know," my father said skeptically. "It **is** a public school-"

"Oh, hush!" my mother cut him off again. "Yamato, you'll be fine, don't worry."

I was tempting to go and change my outfit-to what, I didn't know, but I was a little concerned. If my father thought I was overdressed, then I probably was. The time flew by, though, and soon my father and I were in his car on the way to my new school.

"Yamato," my father said to me, "try to have a nice day. If you focus on your studies, everything should be alright. Remember that making friends takes time and if people don't appreciate you for who you are, then you shouldn't be bothered with them."

It didn't sound as if my father had much faith in my new peers, which worried me. Maybe I should have taken his advice and changed my outfit. I was starting to become worried.

"I'll remember that," I said, trying not to sound as nervous as I was.

Too soon, it seemed, we arrived in front of the school. I stepped out of the car after thanking my father for driving me and waved goodbye. He drove away and I faced the school building, taking a deep breath.

It didn't matter really matter what I did; I was doomed from the start.

**xXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx**

As I made my way to the school doors, I received several stares from the groups I passed. Needless to say, this caused me to feel extremely uncomfortable and self-conscious, especially when they started whispering and snickering.

"Hey, preppy-boy!"

I was aware that the person was speaking to me and I turned around to face the direction the voice was coming from. A tall, tough-looking boy was walking over to me. I contemplated turning back around and quickly walking away, but instead stood and waited for him to approach.

The boy had short dark hair, mud-coloured eyes, and was wearing a pair of jeans and a red hooded sweater. I noticed that everyone was dressed about three times as casual as I was. Apparently my father had been very right.

"You new here, Blondie?"

I nodded, trying to ignore the mocking tone of his voice.

The boy let out a snort. "It figures. Well, I'll enjoy watching you get your ass kicked... if I don't do it myself."

A chill ran down my spine and I took that as my cue to leave. Luckily the boy didn't come after me. I swallowed a lump in my throat, feeling a thousand times more uneasy than I had a few minutes before. At the rate things were going, I would be lucky if I made it through my first day in one piece.

**xXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx**

Finding my locker proved to be an extremely difficult task. I walked around the whole school at least twice and still hadn't found it. The first bell rang and then, a few minutes after, the last bell rang signaling that I was late for class. I was late for class on my first day. That couldn't be good.

On my second trip around the school, I finally found my locker. However, once I'd gotten the books that I needed, I realized that I still needed to find out where my first class was.

With a groan, I shut my eyes and leaned back against my locker. _So much for making a good impression._

"You new here?"

My eyes flew open and I stared, startled. The owner of the voice chuckled. I continued to stare like an idiot.

The boy had a very unique look to him. His skin was very tanned and he had deep chocolate-coloured eyes that seemed warm and gentle, as did his smile. His hair was brown and very wild-looking, but it suited him. In fact, he was quite attractive.

Upon thinking such a thing, I felt my face begin to heat up. Attractive? What was I thinking? No, I wasn't attracted to him myself- I simply thought that he would probably be attractive to girls our age. My thoughts had simply gotten mixed up.

Finally I realized he was waiting for an answer and that I looked like an idiot just standing there. I began stuttering a response.

"Yeah, I- I'm trying to... I mean, I-"

"What's your first class?"

I looked down at my schedule, but it puzzled me. "Um..."

His tan hand reached over and plucked the paper out of my hands. I watched his eyes sweep over the schedule quickly, then meet mine again.

"Music... you're at the complete opposite end of the school."

"Oh, great," I said with a groan.

"Hey, no problem." The boy handed me my schedule back with a smile. "I've got Music now too."

"Shouldn't you be in class, then?" I asked, then realized I might have sounded rude. "I mean, not that I'm ungrateful, but-"

The boy waved his hand in dismissal.

"I'm running a bit late."

And it was as simple as that.

The boy and I had a nice, short chat on the way to class. I learned that his favorite instrument was the drums and he found out that I was quite fond of playing the acoustic or classical guitar. Before I knew it, we'd reached Music class. I was fifteen minutes late, but I was finally there.

"Here you go," he said, smiling at me.

I was confused. "But... aren't you in this class too?"

The boy shrugged in dismissal. "Nah, I just said that so I could walk you to class. Anyway, I'll see you around. I have a feeling we'll meet again soon."

Throwing me a wink, the boy began to walk away with me staring stupidly after him.

"Wait!" I called, finding my voice.

The boy stopped and turned, raising an eyebrow in question.

"What's your name?" I asked.

The boy smiled.

"Taichi."

Then he continued down the hall.

**xXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx**

Because it was my first day, the teacher wasn't too hard on me. She gave me only a warning, then introduced me to the class. The students weren't exactly friendly. When the teacher asked for someone to show me around school, no one volunteered. That was when I wished Taichi was in the class; he probably would have helped me out. He seemed nice.

The teacher, Mrs. Verarros, sat me beside a boy with sharp green eyes and dark brown hair. He was wearing a forest green sweater with a very inappropriate symbol on it, and I was shocked that the teacher hadn't said anything about it.

"Hi," I said to him, trying to start a polite conversation. "I'm Yamato."

His green eyes flickered towards me and then narrowed, almost into a glare.

"What did you say?"

His voice was as hard and sharp as his eyes.

"I just, um... was saying hi...?"

I braced myself, expecting some sort of rude remark. I wasn't disappointed.

"Who do you think you are, you little fag?"

I tried to avoid his hateful look and focused my eyes towards the front of the class, hoping he wouldn't go out of his way to torture me. Luckily he didn't. When the bell rang, I hurried out of class quickly. I had the feeling that I was most definitely not going to fit in at the school.

**xXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx**

I found my second class by myself and even arrived before the bell rang. A surprise greeted me when I entered the classroom.

"Taichi?"

I felt a surge of shock, and relief at the same time. Maybe the class would be different with him there.

Taichi grinned at me. "Hey. I told you we'd be meeting soon."

When I finally snapped out of my stupor, I realized what he'd said and responded with, "How did you know?"

Taichi shrugged. "I saw your schedule, remember?"

"Oh." _Of course, he helped you find your first class. Thank him, you idiot!_ "Thanks, by the way."

"No problem. It's not easy being new." Taichi patted the seat next to him. "Sit down, I'm not gonna bite."

I sat next to Taichi and then asked the first question that came to mind:

"Why does everyone I meet-except for you, of course-seem to hate me?"

Taichi didn't seem fazed. "Well, I'm sure they don't **hate** you... if they're treating you badly, though, it's probably because of the way you look."

"What's wrong with the way I look?" I asked, frowning and feeling slightly offended.

Taichi noticed my tone and shook his head. "No, I'm not talking about your physical features or anything... there's definitely nothing wrong there. With an outfit like that, though, you killed your reputation before you even had one."

"Great," I said with a groan.

"Don't worry. That can all be changed." He grinned at me.

The bell rang and students began filing into the classroom. I stood up, assuming Taichi probably had lots of friends he'd rather sit with, and waited at the back of the class until the seats were filled up to sit down in one of the empty seats near the front. I could feel people staring at me and tried to ignore them, but it was hard.

The teacher was a relatively thin man with jet black, shoulder-length curly hair and dark green eyes. He looked at me and I knew he'd noticed that I was new, but he didn't introduce me.

"Listen up," he said loudly, and all voices ceased. "Answer quickly, I want to get this over with," he added, then began taking attendance. "Allison."

"Here," came a voice from behind me.

"Hugo."

"Yeah," a boy said lazily.

The list went on. I snapped to attention when I heard my name.

"This is a new one... Yamato Ishida."

I raised my hand silently, and the teacher looked over at me with a raised eyebrow.

"So you're the new kid, huh?"

I wasn't sure if I was supposed to respond, so I didn't. After a moment, the teacher continued with calling names, ignoring the way I was staring at him. Where I came from, that was hardly appropriate behaviour.

"And finally," the teacher finished, "Tai. Don't say a word, Yagami, I can see your hair clearly from all the way over here."

There were a few snickers and Taichi grinned.

"At least I know I stand out," he retorted. There was more laughter, and the teacher rolled his eyes.

"Whatever, Yagami. Anyway, today we're going to take a look at a book called..."

By the end of class, I was amazed at how different the teacher was from the ones I was used to. He didn't assign any homework at the end of class and during class he used most of the time for class discussion and interacted a lot with the students instead of just using a textbook to teach.

My next class wasn't really a class at all; I had my lunch period. As I stood at my locker putting away my books, I heavily considered not going into the cafeteria. Eating lunch in there would only give people more of a chance to pick on me.

Taichi discreetly approached and stood behind me while I contemplated this, giving me a start when I turned around.

"How long have you been standing there?" I asked self-consciously.

"A few minutes. Hey, what's your name? You didn't give it to me earlier."

"It's Yamato."

Taichi nodded. "Cool. Wanna have lunch with me?"

I looked at him in disbelief. "What did you do, memorize my schedule?"

He laughed. "Kinda. You've got lunch, then science and history, right?"

"You're unbelievable," I said, giving him an incredulous look.

When we reached the cafeteria, Taichi told me to pick a table and that he'd be back in a moment. Then he left. I chose a table at one end of the cafeteria, in a corner so that perhaps people wouldn't notice me as much. I received several strange looks on the way to the table, though.

After a few minutes had passed, I began to think that Taichi wasn't coming back and that it had been a cruel, twisted joke to get my hopes up. His kindness hadn't felt false, though. Just as I was about to give up, Taichi appeared out of nowhere sat down at the table.

"Hey. I just had to say hi to some friends... you didn't think I was gonna leave you here alone, did you?"

"Of course not," I lied.

"Good. So, let's talk. Tell me about yourself." Tai leaned forward, seeming genuinely interested.

"There's not really much to tell," I hedged, not wanting him to find out something that he didn't like.

He rolled his eyes. "Oh, c'mon, I'm not gonna bite or anything. I just wanna learn some things about you."

Once again, I dodged the question. "You did. You learned my name."

"I already knew that; I heard it in class. I just wanted an excuse to talk to you."

I stared at Taichi in amazement. "Do you start every conversation with a lie?"

"No but it got you talking, didn't it?"

I had to laugh.

Taichi and I talked about general things, like movies and sports. He liked soccer, street hockey and skateboarding while I liked tennis, badminton, and ice skating. He was into action and comedy movies and rock music; I preferred dramatic films and pop or classical rock music.

Taichi was basically my opposite, even in appearance. He had dark hair; I had light. He was tanned; I was much paler. He had brown eyes; I had blue. The list of differences went on and on.

Taichi was in my science class that afternoon, so he showed me the way there. When the day ended, I was relieved that I'd made it through the first day. If I could get through the next couple of days, maybe things would blow over and everyone would forget that I even existed.

Things took a turn for the worse, however. The moment I stepped outside of the school doors, someone grabbed me and dragged me behind the school. They were much stronger than I was, and the person harshly slammed my back against the wall of the building. It was only then that I saw the narrowed brown eyes and unpleasantly familiar glare.

"Enjoy your day, wimp? Man, what a wuss. Didn't even put up a fight."

I wasn't sure if I was supposed to answer, so I didn't. Apparently I was right in doing so, because he continued talking almost instantly.

"I'm gonna spare you, Blondie. I'll make this quick and simple."

I didn't even get to wonder what 'this' was; almost instantly, a fist was thrust into my face and I saw nothing but black for several minutes.

**xXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx**

When I got home, I was extremely sore. I hauled myself up to the washroom and collapsed onto the floor. Luckily I'd remembered how to get home from school and I was partially glad that I'd had to walk because otherwise my dad would have seen my bruises and questioned me. On the other hand, my legs and feet were aching.

"Yamato?" my mother called, knocking on the door. "Didn't you hear me say hello?"

"I'm sorry," I forced myself to say, wincing at the pain in my split lip. "I'm just feeling a bit ill."

"Well, there are some tablets in the cupboard above the sink that should help cure your nausea. When you're finished in there, come downstairs; I need you to do a few chores for me."

I heard her footsteps fade down the hall and forced myself to stand. After a glimpse in the mirror, I stepped out of the bathroom and into the hall.

"Mom, I'm going in the shower!" I called down the stairs.

Without waiting for a reply, I retrieved my robe from my room and grabbed a towel from the linen closet, then went back into the washroom. Locking the door, I looked again in the mirror.

I'd been beaten pretty badly. Along with the split lip was a slightly swollen eye, an awful pain in my stomach, and a few bruises. My legs felt heavy and pain shot through them every time I stood up.

I decided to take a bath instead of a shower, and turned the tap on to let it run. As I took off my clothes, I realized that my shirt had blood on it from my lip and my pants had a rip at the knee. How was I supposed to explain this to my parents?

After the bathtub was filled up, I turned off the water and climbed in, leaning back and shutting my eyes. My muscles started to relax and I let out a heavy sigh.

_It's over,_ I reminded myself. _You survived the first day. Barely, but you still survived._

Judging by my throbbing pains and still-bleeding lip, I would have to make sure I avoided the boy who'd beaten me up. Either that or I needed some immediate fighting classes.

Avoiding him sounded like a good idea.

**xXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx**

When I woke up, my whole body was aching. However, I knew I had to go to school. If I wanted to stay home, I would have to tell my parents what had happened and I definitely wasn't going to admit to them that I'd been beaten up on my first day at the new school. They probably had enough to worry about as it was.

The previous night, I'd used my mother's makeup to cover up my swollen eye and put on chapstick for my split lip. She'd believed me when I said I was feeling better and I'd even managed to eat dinner. As far as I knew, she didn't suspect a thing.

Putting my pants into a garbage bag, I'd thrown it out with the regular garbage, knowing my parents wouldn't notice. I offered to do the laundry for my mother so that I could bleach my shirt to get the blood off. My mother wasn't suspicious because I'd volunteered to do the laundry a few times before. And so, I'd kept it well-hidden from them so far.

I figured it didn't matter what I wore since I'd already been beaten up, so I put on a pair of khaki dress pants and a white collared, button-up shirt. I slicked my hair back as usual, and threw on the same jacket I'd worn the previous day. I knew what I was wearing still was nothing like what the other students at school had been dressed in, but I didn't know if I even had those kinds of clothes.

I wasn't hungry and I didn't feel like eating, but my mother had made breakfast and I didn't want her labour to go to waste so I sat down at the kitchen table like nothing was wrong. My parents would know something was wrong if I didn't eat.

"How was your day at school yesterday?" my father asked. "You were already in bed when I got home."

"It was fine," I lied with a forced smile. "I was just tired." But my father didn't stop there.

"Did you make any new friends?"

I hated lying. Then I remembered Taichi and a faint, genuine smile appeared on my face. "Yes."

"Good." My father looked relieved. "Do your teachers seem alright?"

"Yes, I'm sure they'll be fine."

"Good," he said again, nodding.

Luckily, he didn't ask any more questions. We finished breakfast and began the drive to school.

"Try not to get used to being driven in the mornings," my father said as we pulled up to the school. "You might be walking to **and** from school soon."

That gave me another reason to suspect that there were problems. I wanted to ask him about it, but I didn't. He would have to tell me sooner or later.

I got out of the car with my bag, trying not to show my nervousness. I heard my father's car pull away and tried to relax, taking a deep breath. I had about ten minutes until the first bell rang, but went straight inside the school immediately. I didn't want to increase my chances of being spotted by the boy who had beaten me up.

After I retrieved my books for class, I didn't know what to do with myself. I wandered up and down the hall for a few minutes, then returned to my locker and slumped against it, sliding to the ground. I let my head fall back against the locker and sighed in frustration.

I heard a soft chuckle and looked to the side to find Taichi, leaning against a locker a few doors down.

"I didn't know you were there," I said.

"I know," he stated simply, then walked the short distance and sat beside me.

"I see you haven't ditched the look," he observed.

"It doesn't matter, the damage is done."

My voice was bitter and Taichi picked up on that.

"What do you mean? You talking about your rep? That can be fixed, don't worry. As long as you stop picking out outfits like this, that is."

"No, I'm talking about being used as a human punching bag."

"What? Who? And when?" Taichi sounded genuinely surprised.

"This guy... he started picking on me from the moment I walked into the schoolyard. Then yesterday, after school..." I really didn't feel like bringing up the memory. Luckily, Tai seemed to understand.

"What did he look like? Do you know his name?"

"He had dark hair... dark brown. And he had these brown eyes that were the weirdest colour..."

"Were a bunch of guys following him around?"

I nodded.

"Kouji. That fucking bastard."

Just then, the bell rang. I was a bit surprised at the venom in Taichi's voice-and his language- but didn't have time to dwell on it.

"Listen, Yamato," he said, grabbing a pen and ripping a piece of paper from his binder, "call me tonight. If we see each other later, I'll explain, but I'm leaving after first period for a doctor's appointment. So call me. Okay?"

He handed me the scrap of paper, and I looked at it. He'd written his number and 'CALL ME'... I guess to reinforce the importance of it. When I looked up he was gone, lost in the crowd of people who had entered the building just seconds ago.

I glanced back down at the paper, then gathered my books and stood up, starting to make my way to class. Maybe Taichi really did want to be my friend.

Then another thought popped into my head. Maybe it was a fake number. Maybe he and his real friends thought that this was all a big joke.

I entered my first period classroom and sat down. There were only a few other people in there, excluding the teacher. Students were sitting around chatting amongst each other, laughing and talking and generally looking content. I had to wonder if I'd ever be content in Kukachi. The only hope I had was Taichi. If he was really willing to be my friend, then maybe I could stand being there.

I was brought back to reality by the teacher starting the lesson. Then I drifted back to my thoughts again. It was one of the first times I'd ever neglected a lesson. I was too busy thinking about Kouji. Would he find me again after school? And what about Tai? Was his offer of friendship real?

All I could do was wait and see.

**xXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx**


	3. Friends?

DISCLAIMER: I don't own Digimon or rights to any of the characters, I am not making a profit from this, etc.

**Kukachi  
II: Friends?  
**by: neo-chan

First period passed by slowly that morning. I kept looking at the clock and wondering why only five minutes had gone by. The boy beside me was wearing another shirt with rude symbols and words on it. This time it didn't go unnoticed.

"Excuse me, Mr. Naguri," the teacher said, frowning, "take off that shirt! You know that's against school policy!"

He wordlessly removed his shirt, revealing a similar one underneath. There were a few snickers, and the teacher grew more frustrated.

"Take that one off, too! Don't be smart with me!"

With a shrug, the boy did so. Only, he had no other shirts beneath that one.

I gaped at him, shocked that a student had been so disrespectful. The other students were whispering and/or laughing in disbelief, and some girls whistled at the sight of the boy's rock-hard chest. Some boys did too.

"Go to the office!" the teacher snapped, fed up. The boy picked up his shirts and left without a glance backwards. I was still shocked, to say the least. I couldn't believe he had done that.

Time passed by much faster after that incident and before I knew it, lunch was upon me. I had just put my books in my locker when I remembered that Taichi wouldn't be there. Now there was no chance of having anyone to sit with.

Like a pathetic coward, I ate my lunch in the boys' bathroom. It never occurred to me that someone could just come in and find me.

Unfortunately, that's just what happened.

**xXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx**

I was sitting in the bathroom hoping I could survive the day when no other than Kouji walked in, a few boys following behind him. I froze and stared as a wicked smirk crossed his face.

"So this is where you're hiding, Blondie. We missed you. Now I get to pound the rest of your face in."

He advanced towards me as the other boys stood behind and watched. I made an attempt to escape quickly but he slammed me against the wall and punched me, nearly cracking my jaw. I cried out in pain and he sneered.

"Little Blondie can't handle a bit of roughhousing, huh? You better get used to it, bitch."

Kouji slammed me hard against the wall, then threw me to the ground. My head hit the side of the counter on the way down and I blacked out for a second from the pain. When I could see and think again, Kouji was kneeling over me, throwing punches that nearly knocked me unconscious.

He yanked me up by my shirt collar and hauled me off of the floor, grabbing my head and shoving it under the tap. He turned the water on full-blast and I spluttered and coughed, trying to wriggle out of the firm grip he had on my neck.

I struggled harder to get my head out from under the water and finally succeeded, but banged my head on the tap in the process. I felt a burning on my scalp and forehead and felt water running down my face, meshing with the tears that had begun streaming down my face. Blood trickled down the side of my face and a drop fell into my eye, blurring my vision with red.

The last thing I remembered seeing through the mess of blood and tears was Kouji's cruel smile and his fist coming towards my face.

**xXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx**

I didn't know how, but someone found me. Not just anyone; a girl. When I came to, I was in the nurse's office and the girl was washing the cuts on my face.

"Oh, you're awake!" she said when she saw my eyes open. "How are you feeling?"

"Horrible," I answered truthfully.

She chuckled a bit. "I'm Mimi Tachikawa. You are...?"

"Yamato Ishida. How did you find me?"

"Well, I overheard Kouji bragging about how he beat you up and felt sorry for you, so I came and got you from the floor in the guys' bathroom. Kouji stashed you in one of the stalls so no one would notice."

"You came into the boys' bathroom to help someone you don't even know?"

"Like I said, I felt sorry for you. Kouji's an asshole."

"So I've heard." I sighed and stayed silent for a bit while she continued cleaning me up. Then I thought of something.

"What time is it?"

"Third period just ended."

"Do the teachers know you're out of class?"

Mimi shrugged. "Probably. I mean, I **did** have to get help to drag you here, so the nurse must've explained to our teachers what happened."

"Oh no. Did she call my parents?"

"You gonna be in trouble?"

"No, it's just... they'll be worried."

"Don't worry, babe. I told her they were on vacation. Figured you wouldn't want them to know. She believed me, so all is well."

I sighed, relieved. "Good. They have no idea what's going on."

"What **is** going on, huh?" She asked, snapping her gum. "Between you and Kouji, I mean. Why's he picking on you?"

"I'm new here," I explained, "and apparently he hates me just for being new."

"I knew I hadn't seen you around before. Your clothes were a bit of a giveaway, of course, but I was just making sure. I just came back from vacation yesterday."

"Oh. Well, thanks for helping me. I really appreciate it."

"No problem." Mimi blew a bubble and popped it, then winked.

When Mimi had finished cleaning me up, she went back to class. She would've stayed but I told her I'd be fine. The nurse came in after that and told me to take it easy. She said she'd warned the teachers that I wouldn't be attending the rest of my classes and Mimi had volunteered to get my homework for me. I was honestly extremely thankful to have met her.

It was pure torture to walk home. I'd gotten permission to leave early from the office, so I took my time but it was still difficult. If my parents asked, I planned to say that I was sore from gym. They didn't know that I didn't even have gym class. And if they noticed any cuts or bruises, which Mimi had tried her best to cover up, I could say I got hit in gym by a soccer ball or something.

When I walked through the front door, my mother poked her head out of the kitchen and her eyes widened instantly.

"Yamato! What happened to your face?"

"I was hit with a ball in gym," I fibbed, "and then I crashed into someone accidentally."

"My goodness! How were you able to function in class?"

"Actually, I couldn't. I was in the nurse's office for the rest of the day."

"What about your classes? How will you catch up?"

"It's alright, mom. A friend is getting my homework for me." Then I realized I'd forgotten to pick it up from Mimi. I didn't mention this, though.

"Oh, good. Well, you should go up to your room and rest. I'll call you when dinner's ready."

Once I was inside my room, I laid down on my bed, tired and aching. I didn't want to get up again for the rest of the day.

Lying to my parents was something I rarely did. Of course, it was for the best. They didn't need the burden of knowing that their son was being picked on at school just because he was new.

I spotted the phone on my dresser and Taichi popped into my mind. _That's right, I have to call him. But not now... later. I'll just take a quick nap first..._

**xXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx**

I slept for longer than I'd planned. It was nearly time for dinner when I woke up. Glancing at my clothes, I decided to take a shower. I could still feel Kouji's hands on me, and I wanted to get rid of that feeling.

A bath once again would have been relaxing and soothing, but dinner would soon be ready and I had to be out by then. So I suffered through a shower and afterwards I rubbed cream on myself to try and ease the pain.

Shortly after, I was called down for dinner. My father had just arrived home and asked the same questions as he had the previous day; how was school, did I make any new friends, and did the teachers seem any good. I answered them all much as I had the previous day and with a fake smile, trying not to focus on my aching body.

After dinner, I helped my mother do the dishes.

"A friend of yours stopped by earlier," she mentioned. "A nice girl, really... except that her hair was dyed. It's a shame, too, she was such a pretty girl. I don't know why such a pretty girl wouldn't just keep her natural hair color. Her name was... Mimi, is it?"

I was surprised. "Really? She came by?"

"Yes, she said she'd gotten your address from the secretary. She dropped off your homework for you and said that she hopes you feel better."

"I'll have to thank her tomorrow."

"Well, she left her phone number, why don't you phone her when we're finished with the dishes?"

"I will."

**xXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx**

After I finished helping out with the dishes, I went up to my room and found the homework Mimi had collected laying on my desk. Written on a slip of paper on top of the pile was Mimi's number.

I picked up the phone and dialed the number, then waited.

"Hello?" came a voice.

"Hello, is Mimi there please?"

"Sure, just a second." The person put down the phone and yelled, "Mimi!"

A minute later, the phone was picked up. "Hello?"

"Hi. It's Yamato, from school-"

"Oh, hey! Did you get the work?"

"Yeah, thanks."

"No problem. Listen, babe, are you doing anything Friday night? I'm having this party at my house and I wanted to know if you could come."

"This Friday?" I thought for a moment, then remembered that my younger cousin Amaya was coming to stay with us for a while and my parents needed me to baby-sit her. "Sorry, I have to baby-sit my cousin."

"Can't you get someone else to watch your cousin?"

"No, I don't think so."

"Well, there'll be other parties. By the way, was it okay that I dropped by so randomly?"

"It's fine. My mom seemed to like you, actually."

"Really? Cool. Anyway, I'll see you tomorrow, right?"

"Yeah. Bye, Mimi."

"Later, babe."

She hung up and I smiled a bit. It was kind of odd being called "babe", but kind of nice at the same time.

It was time to call Taichi. I searched through my schoolbag and found his number, then dialed. The phone rang twice, then someone picked up.

"Hello?"

It sounded like Taichi, but I wasn't sure.

"Hello, may I please speak to Taichi?"

"Man, you're way too formal."

"Um, hi, it's Yamato-"

"I know. What's up?"

"Well, earlier you said to phone-"

"Yeah, about that; anything happen with Kouji today?"

I bit my lip. "Actually... yeah."

"What happened?" Taichi sounded concerned.

It pained me to think of Kouji's assault, but I described my experience to Taichi anyway. It made me sound weak and pathetic, but I knew-or at least hoped-Taichi wouldn't think of me that way.

"Shit!" Taichi exclaimed when I finished telling him. "What an asshole! What a fucked-up asshole! Who the hell does he think he is?"

I was a bit surprised at how angry he sounded and remained silent. Taichi continued speaking, still sounding mad.

"Yamato, we have to do something about this. Kouji isn't gonna stop this shit unless things change. Listen, wear casual clothes tomorrow and ask your parents if you can come to my house on Friday. I'll give you my address tomorrow."

"Friday? I can't make it, I have to baby-sit my cousin."

"Saturday, then. That good?"

"I guess so..."

"Okay, call me back when you find out. Bye."

He hung up. I sighed and went downstairs. My parents didn't know Taichi. They'd never even seen or heard of him. If they let me go to his house, I'd be more than surprised.

**xXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx**

"Mom, Dad?" I asked nervously, stepping into the living room.

"Yes, Yamato?" my father answered.

"I was wondering... my friend Taichi asked if I could go to his house on Saturday."

My parents looked at each other.

"I know you don't know him," I rushed on, "but he really needs help with his homework and-"

"Yamato, you can go."

I stopped, unsure if I'd heard correctly. "...pardon me?" I asked carefully.

"You can go," my mother repeated.

"Thank you!" I exclaimed. I couldn't believe it.

"I'm glad you're making new friends, Yamato." My father smiled.

So that was it; they were just happy I had made friends. I didn't care why they'd said yes, though- I was allowed to go to Taichi's and that was all that mattered.

I returned to my room and phoned Taichi again. He picked up on the first ring and I told him the good news.

"Good," he said. "We've got a lot of work to do."

I didn't know what he meant by that but I didn't let it bother me. I told Taichi I had to do my homework and he had a good laugh, but let me go.

I completed my homework in about an hour. When I looked at the clock, it was almost eight thirty. I wasn't sure what time Taichi was allowed to receive calls until, so I decided not to call him again that night. I would see him tomorrow anyway.

**xXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx**

I woke up Thursday morning with Taichi in my head. Remembering his request, I tried to pick out some casual clothes but couldn't find any. Eventually I settled on a pair of grey pants and a golf shirt. When it came time to do my hair, I made sure it was neat but didn't use any products in it. Hopefully I looked a little bit more casual.

"Well," my mother said as I walked into the kitchen, frowning slightly, "you look a little different today, Yamato."

I nodded nervously. "I suppose so."

My mother didn't seem please but luckily my father didn't seem to care and I sat down to eat breakfast, avoiding my mother's eyes. It was only a slight change, she really shouldn't have cared anyway.

Fortunately I didn't run into Kouji that morning. I reached my locker without any trouble and began to take my books out. I had five minutes until the bell rang and most kids were outside chatting or walking around the school leisurely with their friends. However, I obviously had no one to do this with.

"Hey," Taichi's voice came out of nowhere, and I jumped. He chuckled.

"I didn't know you-" I started, but he cut me off.

"-were here? I know."

Then he got a good look at me. He raised an eyebrow.

"This is your idea of casual?"

"Well..."

"When I said casual, I meant more like what I'm wearing."

I looked at Taichi. He was dressed in a pair of loose jeans, a hooded sweater, and sneakers.

"Don't you have jeans or anything?" he asked.

I paused for a second. Did I? "I don't know."

"Whoa, for real?" Taichi looked surprised. "I thought everyone had jeans!"

I blushed slightly. He must think I was a really big loser. "I'll check my closet when I get home."

"Well, if you don't, you will soon. Got any plans for next Saturday?"

"Um... not that I'm aware of."

"Good. You should come to my place."

I stared at Taichi. "But... I'm coming to your house this Saturday, aren't I?"

"Yeah, but one weekend's not gonna do it."

The bell rang, so I didn't get to ask any further questions.

"Alright, listen," Taichi said, "dress casual tomorrow, this time for real. We'll talk more later. You okay getting to class?"

I nodded, dumbfounded. How would this help? Would my parents let me go to Taichi's the next Saturday also? And what did Taichi mean by "real work"?

When I snapped out of my stupor, Taichi was gone again. I finished gathering my books and shut my locker, starting towards my first class. My mind would be on Taichi for the whole day, I knew it. Why was he so hard to stop thinking about?

**xXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx**

For all of first period, as predicted, Taichi stayed on my mind. When first period ended I hurried to my locker and quickly gathered my books, eager to see Taichi. Maybe seeing him would stop my thoughts about him.

When I got to class, Taichi was already there- with another boy. When Taichi saw me, he grinned and waved me over. I stayed put, unsure. I guess he could sense my uneasiness because he rolled his eyes and motioned for me to come over.

I reluctantly made my way over to him. What if his friend hated me, or worse; what if he got angry at Taichi for talking to me?

"Hey," Taichi said, taking my hand and tugging me into the seat beside him. His friend turned around, and I realized with a shock that it was the boy from my music class. I stared, my brain going numb. This was bad.

"Yamato, meet Akira. Akira, meet Yamato," Taichi said.

"We've met," Akira said, a smirk on his face.

"H-hi," I said, managing to form a few words. "It's, um, it's nice to meet you."

Akira didn't look too thrilled to meet me, however.

"Why do you sit all the way up front?" Taichi asked me, breaking the tension before it even started.

"Um... I don't know," I answered stupidly.

"Sit around here." Taichi pointed at the seat to the left of him. "Sit there."

"But... doesn't someone else sit there?"

"No one important. They'll sit somewhere else."

"But won't the teacher notice?"

"Enough 'but's! People are starting to come in, just sit there already!"

I did, but was nervous and uncomfortable. What if the person who sat there got angry with me? What if the teacher noticed and got angry?

When class started, I was relieved. Mr. Terada hadn't noticed, or just didn't care. And no angry students had approached me. I guess I just needed to trust Taichi, and then maybe everything would be alright. It was hard, though, because although he seemed genuine, I could always be wrong.

Taichi and I sat alone at lunch, to my relief. I'd been afraid he would invite Akira to sit with us.

"So," he said, leaning back in his chair, "anything else big happen yesterday?"

"No... not really. I had to sit out on all of my classes after lunch because of Kouji." I frowned at the thought.

"Right. So, you met Akira before?"

"We just sit beside each other in Music class."

"That's cool."

"I guess."

Taichi raised an eyebrow. "You guess? What, you don't like him?"

"No, it's not that," I said quickly. "It's just-"

"Akira's not a very friendly guy," Taichi interrupted me. "Don't worry. He doesn't hate you or anything."

"Are you sure?" I asked skeptically.

Taichi shrugged. "He's just like that. What do you think of him?"

"I don't know... we haven't really talked or anything."

"Where do you live?" Taichi asked all of a sudden. Why was he asking so many questions?

"Um... around here," I said, avoiding the question.

Taichi rolled his eyes. "I'm not gonna stalk you or anything. Where do you live?"

I told him my address and he nodded, looking impressed.

"Those big houses, huh?"

"They're not really that big."

Taichi's eyebrows shot up. "Not big? Where the hell did you move from?"

"Rihtona?" I offered timidly.

A flicker of understanding passed through Taichi's eyes.

"Ohh..." he said, as if that explained everything. Which, I guess, it kind of did. "So you're one of those rich kids. Why'd you move here?"

I hesitated for a moment. "Actually," I said truthfully, "I don't know."

**xXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx**

Luckily Taichi didn't try to introduce me to anyone else that day. Akira was in our Science class also, but he didn't say anything to me and I didn't say anything to him. At least he wasn't going out of his way to pick on me, though.

I didn't see or hear from Taichi until the next morning when I arrived at my locker. I was dressed in a pair of what I thought were casual black pants and another white golf shirt. Taichi laughed when he saw me and said "We'll work on it". I took that as a sign that I still hadn't dressed casually enough. The rest of the day went similarly to the previous day and Taichi and I chatted for a few minutes after school before I headed home. He told me he would call later.

At 7:30, Taichi did call. Unfortunately I had to put Amaya to bed shortly after that so I told him I'd call back. My parents had left at 6:30 that evening and wouldn't tell me where they were going but I had a feeling that they wouldn't be returning until much later.

I waited until Amaya was asleep, then went in my room to call Taichi.

"Hello?" he answered.

"Hi, it's me-"

"Hey, what's up?"

"Nothing, I guess."

"Same here. You psyched for tomorrow?"

"Uh, I guess so."

"Am I picking you up or are you getting a drive?"

"Uh..."

"I'll pick you up, then. What time is good for you?"

"Any time, I guess."

"Noon okay?"

"It should be."

"Okay. That's enough planning. So what're you doing?"

"Well, I was thinking about doing some homework."

Taichi laughed. "Are you serious?"

"Yeah... why?"

"On a Friday night? You're crazy. Well, listen, I've gotta go. Mimi's having this party tonight... she said she invited you?"

"Yeah, but I have to stay here for my cousin."

"Oh yeah. Well I'll see you tomorrow at noon, okay?

"Okay. Bye."

I actually did do some homework after that, and then I wasted time until I went to bed. I felt anxious for the next day. What if Taichi's parents didn't like me? Or, worse, what if Taichi himself decided that he didn't like me?

Hundreds of doubts and worries flooded my mind, but there was really only one that scared me: What if Taichi wasn't who he appeared to be?

**xXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx**


	4. Filling the Mould

DISCLAIMER: I don't own Digimon or rights to any of the characters, I am not making a profit from this, etc.

**Kukachi  
III: Filling the Mould  
**by: neo-chan

Taichi arrived at my house right at noon on Saturday. His mother had driven and she and my mother introduced themselves to each other briefly. When Taichi's mother had seen me, her eyes had lit up.

"Who's this, Tai, a new friend?" she had asked.

"Yup," Taichi had confirmed. "Mom, this is Yamato Ishida. Yamato, meet my mom."

"It's nice to meet you, Mrs. Yagami," I'd said with a polite smile.

Taichi's mother had let out a light, amused laugh. It didn't sound mean or anything, it just sounded like she was pleasantly surprised.

"Well, Yamato, it's delightful to meet you!"

Taichi's house wasn't too far from mine. When we arrived, he began to steer me towards his room.

"Tai, your sister went to her friend's house," his mother told him. "Could you pick her up later?"

"Sure. Me and Yamato are just gonna be in my room."

"Alright. I'll call you when dinner's ready!" His mother smiled at me again, then went back to her task.

"Your mom's really nice," I said to Taichi as he opened the door to his room.

"She likes you, I can tell," Taichi told me. "Anyway, my room's a bit messy..."

Taichi turned on the light and I stared.

There were clothes strewn all across the room along with textbooks, notebooks, other school supplies, and various random object. A stereo with a CD player was also on the ground, with a bunch of CDs and CD cases on the floor near it. There was even a box of cookies in the corner and an opened bag of chips on his bed.

Taichi looked at my face and laughed. "It gets worse than this sometimes."

I had a hard time believing that.

"Do you skateboard?" I asked, noticing a skateboard leaning against his closet door.

"Yeah," he confirmed. "I should teach you sometime."

Taichi hopped over the piles of clothing and books and made space on the bed, pushing some things off. "C'mon, sit."

I managed to get over to his bed and take a seat beside him. No one I'd ever known had had a room like his.

"Hungry?" he asked, holding out the bag of chips. I shook my head no and he shrugged, stuffing a few chips into his mouth.

Taichi rested the bag back on the bed. "Okay. First, let's see the damage left. Come closer."

I did, slightly. Taichi rolled his eyes.

"I'm not gonna bite, don't worry."

I moved forward again, halting once I was a few inches away from him. He nodded, satisfied, then brushed my hair back and tilted my face with his hand. "Hm..."

I had to concentrate on trying to breathe normally, my throat tightening. He was way too close for comfort. When he rubbed his finger along my jaw line, I had to keep from shivering. Why the hell was he making me feel so awkward? And why was he touching me in the first place?

"Tell me if this hurts," he said, then began using his finger and applying pressure to different areas of my scalp.

I was about to ask him what he was doing when he reached the spot I'd injured in the bathroom. I hissed involuntarily and pulled away.

"Hurts?" Taichi asked.

"Yeah," I confirmed, a burning sensation lingering in that spot.

Taichi nodded, then eased me closer again and began undoing the buttons on my shirt.

"What are you doing?" I asked, jerking away slightly in surprise.

"Checking your bruises," Taichi said, like it was the simplest thing in the whole world. "I want to see how badly Kouji beat you up on Wednesday."

"Oh." I must've sounded like a complete idiot. But, really, how else was I supposed to take it when he'd just all of a sudden started undoing my shirt?

Taichi finished removing my shirt and it may have just been my imagination, but his eyes seemed to linger on my naked torso for just a moment too long. I opened my mouth to say something, though I'm not sure what, but at that second he spoke.

"Where'd he bang you up the most? Besides your head, I mean."

"Um... I don't know, my back, I guess."

"Then turn around," Taichi instructed.

I obediently turned so that my back was facing Taichi and jumped a bit when I felt his hand on my spine.

"Calm down," he said. "I'm not gonna do anything."

I couldn't help but feel tense, though, as Taichi's hand moved down my back and then to my hip. This motion, however small it was, stirred something up inside of me and I began to feel very uneasy. Then again, I **was** half-naked with someone I didn't even really know... not to mention there was really no need for him to have his hand on me.

"He got you pretty bad here, too. Doesn't it hurt?"

"Yeah. I think my head is the worst by far, though."

"Yeah, that's what I thought." Taichi's hands left my body. "You can put your shirt back on."

I did, relieved. Honestly, I didn't see what the point had been of him looking at and especially **touching** my bruises.

"You've got a pretty bad black eye," Taichi informed me. "And you have a split lip, a big bruise on your jaw, a cut on your head..."

Taichi went on to list all of the injuries he'd seen. I listened, growing more miserable with each cut or bruise he mentioned. Kouji really had beat me up badly. How had my parents not realized that I was lying?

Taichi finished listing my injuries. "Anyway, we're gonna work on the first step today."

I was confused. "First step? Of what?"

Taichi grinned. "Transforming you, of course."

**xXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx**

Taichi explained to me that he was going to attempt to make me fit in at school. Basically, he'd make me blend in until I had a low profile and then I could do whatever I wanted. I argued with him at first, positive that it couldn't be done, but he managed to convince me otherwise.

"For this to work," Taichi said, "we have to be real friends. Do you trust me?"

"What?" I was caught off-guard.

"Do you trust me?" Taichi repeated.

"I... I don't even know you," I replied awkwardly.

"Well, soon you'll get to know me better. Next Saturday's gonna be a big day. I need you to trust me, though. Do I have your trust?"

I hesitated. He did seem like a genuinely nice guy...

"...I guess..."

"It's either yes or no."

_I hope I don't regret this._ "Yes."

"Good." Taichi smiled at me. "In that case, call me Tai. All my friends do. You got a nickname?"

"Some of my friends back in Rihtona used to call me Matt."

"That works. Now, a few questions." Tai leaned forward a bit. "Got any siblings?"

I shook my head. "No. My cousin Amaya is living with me right now, though. She's six."

"I've got a sister named Hikari. Kari for short. She's thirteen. Pets?"

"I don't have any."

"I do, a cat. Actually, it's my sister's cat and its name is Miko. What's your birthday?"

"September 15th. I'm Virgo."

"June 19th. Gemini. Anyway, enough questions. We have to start working on your attitude."

"My attitude?" I asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Yeah. You're always so uptight and stuff. You've gotta be casual with people, even if you don't know them. And you can't be so timid and stuff."

I stared at him blankly, and he sighed.

"We've got a lot of work to do."

**xXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx**

It was slightly later on and Tai had put on some music and was telling me about some bands that people at the school liked, such as a band called Green Day.

"Their old stuff is better than the new stuff," Tai said, "and they're really mainstream and pretty pop-ish, but they should be good to start out listening to. And, chances are, mentioning Green Day will bring up some comment about Blink-182. Personally, I love them because they don't give a shit about what other people think." Tai stopped. "You're sure you haven't at least heard of them?"

I thought for a moment. "I think I might have heard one song by them, maybe, but nothing more than that."

"Wow. But you've got to have heard of classic old stuff, at least: Led Zeppelin, AC/DC, that kind of stuff."

"Well, yes, but I've never actually heard any of their music."

"Are you serious? Then you've probably got absolutely no idea of what I'm talking about when I say the Ramones, the Sex Pistols, the Clash... or any stuff that can be related to punk rock, or alternative rock, roots."

I shook my head once again.

"Well then, I should call damage control." Tai gave me a grin to let me know he was joking. Partially, at least. "Alright. I guess we'll start with some more pop-rock stuff. AFI is a band that some people like. I think they're a bit too 'pop'-like, but they should be okay for you to start out with."

Tai took a CD from his pile and handed it to me. "This is one of Green Day's CDs. Take it home with you and listen to it."

I accepted the CD from Tai and looked at the cover and the back. Nothing sounded even vaguely familiar. Tai popped in another CD and flipped to one of the tracks.

"This is Linkin Park. People accept them here because they're kind of undefined; a mix between rock and rap. This song is one that pretty much everyone has heard. It's called 'In the End'. I like their stuff, it's cool."

"Is rock what everyone mainly listens to?" I asked.

"Yeah. And to be specific, the people I know mostly listen to punk rock and stuff branching off from it. There's a little group in our school that likes to listen to pop shit and call themselves cool. And then there are the classic 'posers', y'know? Well, I guess you really don't know. But anyway, excluding them and the small population of rap-lovers, yeah. Rock, all kinds of rock. Oh, and a lot of people like Eminem even though he's a rap artist. Almost everyone has listened to him at some point. He's pretty cool."

"I've heard of him. His name was kind of taboo where I lived, though."

Taichi snorted. "People shouldn't be so uptight. Most of his stuff is either hilarious or some really deep shit."

I was silent for a moment, just listening to the song by Linkin Park. It ended, and another one began.

"What other artists do students listen to?" I asked Tai. "Or what should I know about?"

"Bands? Well, Nirvana's pretty famous. They made a huge mark. People still listen to their stuff. I'm telling you, older music is gold. Not that Nirvana's old, but classic stuff like AC/DC, Pink Floyd, Guns n' Roses, Led Zeppelin, the Ramones, the Sex Pistols, the Clash; all that stuff I was saying before. I like a lot of stuff, old **and** new. It doesn't even necessarily have to be 'punk' or anything... I hate labels. I'll just list a bunch of bands in general: Billy Talent, My Chemical Romance, The Used, Rise Against, Silverstein, Alexisonfire, Protest the Hero, System of a Down, Anti-Flag... people's tastes range a lot, especially depending on the type of rock they lean towards." Tai looked at my blank face and laughed. "Did I scare you? Honestly, there's so much stuff to choose from. And then there are those bands who come out with only a few songs that people like." Tai stopped and shook his head. "I think I've out-talked myself."

"Tai, could you pick up your sister?"

Both Tai and I jumped a bit, startled by the sound of Mrs. Yagami's voice.

"Okay, Mom!" Tai called back, then stood up.

"I guess we'll continue this later. You up for a walk?"

"Sure."

**xXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx**

Tai and I were walking down the street five minutes later, on our way to his sister's friend's house.

"Her friend doesn't live far," Tai told me. "It won't take long to get there. Besides, you'll get to meet my sister."

"What's your sister like?"

"Kari? Well, she likes kids. She wants to baby-sit but my mom won't let her yet. She says when Kari turns fourteen, she'll think about it."

"What does your sister look like?"

"You'll see when we get there. Don't worry, she doesn't have hair like mine."

I laughed, and Tai grinned at me.

"You know, that's practically the first time you've really laughed since I met you. You should laugh more often."

"Tell me more about your sister," I said, changing the subject.

"You're gonna meet her in a few minutes, why bother? Tell me about your family. Your cousin, what's she like?"

"Um... well... she's six, like I told you. And she has blonde hair," I said lamely, "and blue eyes."

Tai rolled his eyes. "I'm sure there's more to her than **that**."

"There is, but... I don't know, I can't describe her."

"I want to meet her. Your parents, too. What are they like?"

"Um... well..." I didn't know what to say. Why was Taichi so interested in my family?

"Never mind, we're here," Taichi said, turning into a small townhouse complex. "You can tell me later."

I was relieved but at the same time I was slightly nervous. What if his sister thought I was a loser, just like all the other kids?

Before I knew it, Taichi and I were waiting in front of one of the houses. He'd just rung the doorbell and a few moments later, a lock clicked and the door was pulled open. A young black-haired girl stood there, her eyes lighting up instantly.

"Tai!" she exclaimed, rushing to give him a hug.

"Hey, Mikomi," Tai said when she let go of him. "Where's Kari?"

So that wasn't his sister.

"Oh, she's getting her bag. She'll just be a second." Then the girl, Mikomi, noticed me.

"Who's **this**?" she asked, sounding interested.

"This is my friend Yamato," Tai said. "He's new here."

Mikomi eyed me. "Really now?"

I blushed and Tai chuckled. Then another girl appeared at the door.

"Hi, Tai! Hey, who's this?"

She had brown hair that was about shoulder-length and her eyes were more of a maroon-tinted brown, whereas Taichi's were a more of a chocolate-brown colour. Her skin was paler than Tai's, but she bore a slight resemblance to him in some way.

"This is Yamato, Matt for short. He just moved here. And Matt, this is my sister Hikari."

"It's nice to meet you, Hikari," I said with a smile.

"Call me Kari."

"Nice to meet you, Kari."

"You seem kind of different from most of Tai's friends," Kari said thoughtfully. I wondered if that was a good thing or not.

"You guys ready to go?" Kari asked, slipping her feet into her shoes.

Tai nodded. "Yup. Later, Mikomi."

"Bye, Tai! Bye, Matt! Bye, Kari! I hope I'll see you all again soon!"

As soon as we were out of earshot, Kari spoke. "She's still got a crush on you."

"Yeah, I know," Tai said. "I think she likes Matt too now, though."

Kari nodded. "Probably. So, when did you move here, Matt?"

"This Monday. I started school on Tuesday."

"Cool. I'm gonna be in high school soon too."

"You must be excited."

"Yup. High school's where all the action is."

Well, she was right about that.

**xXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx**

Soon after we returned to Tai's house, his mother called us for dinner. She'd made chicken and rice. Simple enough, right?

"This is wonderful, Mrs. Yagami," I complimented her, trying to sound like I meant it.

She beamed at me. "Really?"

I nodded, smiling, and hoped she believed me.

The chicken was bland and dry and parts of the rice were overcooked, others undercooked. But I didn't want to be rude.

"I'm full," Kari announced, pushing back her chair. "It was great, Mom, but I'm just not hungry."

"That's alright," Mrs. Yagami told her. "If you get hungry later, you can just heat it up."

"Okay, Mom."

Kari was free.

As Kari put the food in the fridge, she grinned wickedly at Tai, then pranced off to her room.

"Two can play this game," I heard Tai mutter. He cast a glance at me and adjusted his remark. "Or three."

He raised his voice. "Hey, Mom?"

"Yes, honey?" Mrs. Yagami smiled at her son.

"Do you know where the cordless phone is?"

"Isn't it in your room?" Mrs. Yagami asked.

"No, I can't find it. Maybe one of you used it earlier."

"I don't think so, but I'll go check."

Tai's mom got up and left the kitchen. Tai peeked into the hallway and watched as she entered her bedroom. He grabbed his plate and dumped the remaining food in the garbage.

I gaped at him. "Tai! Your mom worked hard on that food!"

"Yeah, I'm sure she did. Now, are you gonna suffer or survive?"

Feeling guilty beyond belief, I dumped the food in the garbage. Tai scooped up a bit of rice and placed a bit on each of our plates, spreading it out.

"Looks more realistic as leftovers," he explained. "Should've kept some chicken, too..."

"Tai, the phone **was** in your room."

I nearly had a heart attack when Mrs. Yagami walked into the kitchen.

"I guess I didn't notice." Tai shrugged casually.

"You've finished eating already?" Mrs. Yagami asked in surprise, noticing our plates.

"Yeah," Tai lied. "It was great. We were gonna have seconds, but we're too full."

"I'm so glad! Now there's enough for your father to heat up when he comes home!"

Tai smirked. "Yeah." He stood up. "Me and Matt are gonna go to my room. He has to leave in a few hours anyway."

"Your father will be home soon," Mrs. Yagami said. She turned to me. "He can drive you home, Yamato."

"That's very nice of you to offer," I said. "Thank you."

"You're welcome, Yamato. You're very polite, did you know that?"

"Thank you, Mrs. Yagami."

"Yeah, yeah," Tai cut in. "C'mon, Matt, let's go."

When we got to Tai's room, he closed the door and then pulled a box of crackers out of his closet.

"Kari and I usually wait until she leaves or is asleep and cook other food. Either that or we go out and eat, or order pizza. Have some crackers."

I declined, and Tai shoved a cracker in his mouth.

"So," he said after swallowing the cracker, "where were we?"

"You were telling me about some bands."

"Oh yeah. Well, more about that some other time. You've gotta be home at nine?"

I nodded. "Yeah."

"Are you busy next Sunday?"

I blinked at the sudden change in subject. "Um... I don't think so, why?"

"You should sleep over. Next Saturday, I mean. Like I said, we've got a lot to do."

"I don't know if I can... I mean, I don't even know if I can come on Saturday, let alone Sunday. I don't really know you, my parents don't know you-"

"Well how about this; next Saturday my dad and I will pick you up and meet both of your parents."

"I guess..."

"No, better- we'll meet them tonight! When my dad drops you, we'll hang around for a few minutes."

"Uh, okay..."

"Good." Tai offered another cracker to me and, once again, I refused. "What do you think of Kari?"

"She's nice," I said. "And she's really pretty, too."

"Yup, that's my sister! What'd you think of Mikomi?"

"Her friend? She was really nice too."

"She's kind of boy-crazy. She's had a crush on me for a while now. Looks like she's got one on you now, too."

"But she just met me!"

"So? She sees a good-looking guy and immediately loves him. Kari tells me what Mikomi says about me..."

Tai mimicked Mikomi, changing his voice so that it resembled a high-pitched squeal.

"Kari, your older brother is so hot, and cute, and he's so athletic and cool and funny and sweet..." Tai mock-sighed. "Do you think he likes me?"

I laughed. Tai's impression was hilarious.

Tai grinned at me. "Glad I'm entertaining you. Hopefully I can get you to laugh like that more often."

"I'm home!" called a male voice.

"That's my dad," Tai informed me. "Come meet him."

Tai dragged me out of the room and to the kitchen, where his father was greeting his mother. He turned when Tai and I appeared.

"Who's this young man?" Tai's father asked, raising an eyebrow.

"My friend Yamato Ishida," Tai said.

"Hello Yamato," Mr. Yagami said, shaking my hand. "I've never seen you before. Are you new in town?"

"Yes, sir."

Mr. Yagami chuckled at my response, then opened up the fridge.

"So, what's for dinner?"

**xXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx**

It was 8:30pm. Tai, his parents, Kari, and I were on our way to my house. Mrs. Yagami and Kari had wanted to come along to meet my parents too.

"Do I turn right here?" Mr. Yagami asked me.

I nodded. "Yes, sir. And at the next lights, you make a left."

"Got it."

Soon we'd arrived. Mr. Yagami parked his car and the five of us walked to my front door.

I rang the doorbell, anxious. Would my parents like Tai and his family? I sure hoped so.

Moments later, my mother opened the door and was surprised.

"Why, hello! Yamato, I believe a formal introduction is needed?"

"Of course. This is Taichi Yagami, his parents, and his sister, Hikari."

"Oh, so **you're** Yamato's new friend! It's a pleasure to meet you, Taichi. And Hikari, you're a very beautiful young lady."

"Thank you," Kari said happily.

"And it's a pleasure to meet you, too," my mother said to Tai's parents. "Thank you for having Yamato."

"It was no trouble at all. He's very well-mannered."

"Who's at the door?" came my father's voice. He appeared next to my mom.

"Yamato's friend Taichi and his family," my mother replied.

"I'm Taichi's father," Mr. Yagami said, shaking my father's hand. "You have a very polite son."

"Thank you. Matthew Ishida."

"Joseph Yagami. Nice to meet you."

"Taichi and Hikari would like to meet Amaya," I told my mother. "Do you know where she is?"

"Oh, she's inside watching cartoons." My mother turned to the Yagamis. "Would you like to step in for a moment?"

Within five minutes, my parents and Tai's were chatting in the kitchen. My mother and Tai's mother were swapping recipes and drinking tea while our fathers laughed about something or other.

_This is good,_ I thought to myself. _This is **very**_ _good._

"Amaya's probably in the den," I said to Taichi and Hikari. "Come on."

Sure enough, Amaya was in the den watching TV. She looked up at us and Kari squealed.

"She's so adorable!" Kari exclaimed, sitting on the couch beside Amaya. "Hi, I'm Kari. This is Tai, my brother."

"Are you Yamato's friends?" Amaya asked.

Tai nodded. "Yeah, we are."

Amaya smiled at them. "Then I like you."

**xXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx**

Kari was downstairs with Amaya and our parents were still talking, so I decided to give Tai a little tour of the house. Eventually we ended up in my bedroom.

"It's so clean," Tai remarked. "I don't think my room has **ever** looked like this."

I laughed. "I believe you."

"You should, it's true." Tai observed my room. "You've got a lot of nice stuff."

"I guess I come from a pretty rich neighbourhood, compared to here." I slapped a hand over my mouth. "I mean-"

Luckily, Tai wasn't offended.

"Don't worry, I know Kukachi looks like a dump compared to Rihtona. We've never lived there, but a bunch of my relatives do. A few are okay, but the others ones don't keep in touch with us anymore. Our lifestyles are too different, y'know?"

"I'm sorry."

"I'm not. They were snobs. I'm glad you aren't."

"Oh," I said awkwardly. Then I realized what he'd said about me. "Thanks. For saying I'm not a snob, I mean."

"It's the truth," Tai said, smiling at me.

I sat down on my bed, playing with my fingers. "You know... you're not anything like I expected."

"Well, what did you expect?" Tai sat beside me.

"I don't know... I guess I thought you'd hate me, like everyone else. I kind of thought that you were just pretending to be my friend..."

"Why would I do that?"

"To make me feel bad. I mean, everyone seems to hate me so much... I don't know why you don't."

"Because there's no reason to hate you. The kids at school just don't like anyone that looks different from them. That's all it is. There's nothing to hate about you. Honestly, if you dressed like everyone else you probably wouldn't have even been noticed as a new kid."

"Oh."

"I really am your friend. You know that, right?"

"Well, now I do. Thanks."

"For what?"

"Being my friend, I guess."

Tai looked at me oddly.

"Being a friend isn't some kind of favor."

"Well, no, but... I mean, it's not like I have anyone else here, and you're like... I dunno," I said, blushing a bit, "my saviour or something."

Tai grinned a little and he opened his mouth to say something but was cut off.

"Tai, it's time to go!" came Mr. Yagami's voice.

Tai stood up. "Well, I guess they're finally ready."

I nodded and followed him out of the room.

"Remember to ask your parents if you can come next Saturday," Tai said to me as we walked downstairs. "If you can, we'll plan it sometime during the week."

"I will," I promised as we reached the hallway, where our families were saying goodbye.

Once Tai and his family had left, my mother spoke up.

"He seems like a nice boy."

"His family, too," my father added. "You should spend some more time with him."

It was the perfect time to ask.

"Actually, Dad, he asked if I could spend the day with him next Saturday and sleep over that night."

"I think that's a great idea," he said, and my mother nodded in agreement.

They really liked him. Thank God.

**xXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx**

I stood in front of my closet Monday morning, searching for something "casual" to wear. I had a pair of jeans, but they were really tight and I didn't know if that would be okay. After all, the jeans Tai wore were more loose. I also had no idea what type of shirt I should put on.

Eventually I realized that I had to hurry up and decided to just wear the jeans. I found a long-sleeved collared black button-down shirt that didn't look too dressy since I was wearing jeans and put that on. I brushed my hair and checked in the mirror to make sure I looked alright, then picked up my bag and went downstairs.

My father raised an eyebrow when he saw me, but didn't say anything. I think I actually saw him smile a little. My mother, however, reacted differently.

She stared in shock when I entered the kitchen.

"Yamato, you're dressed rather..." she searched for a word, and finally came out with, "differently."

I nodded and sat down to eat. I knew she was expecting an explanation, but I couldn't think of one except for "I've decided to stop being picked on". And, obviously, I wasn't going to say that.

I was feeling very self-conscious as I got out of the car that morning and walked across the schoolyard. When I got inside the school I went straight to my locker and threw my bag inside, relieved that I'd made it that far without anything bad happening.

I took out the supplies I needed for Music, even though I had over five minutes until the bell rang, and shut my locker.

"Hey," Tai said, flashing me a grin.

I shook my head. "Do you always have to pop up out of nowhere?"

Tai laughed, then looked me up and down with raised eyebrows.

"Whoa. It may not be completely as casual as I wanted, but you're so hot that it makes up for it."

I felt my face heating up and tried not to stare in shock. "What?" I asked in disbelief, wondering if I'd heard wrong.

"You look so hot in that!" Tai exclaimed. "Man, if you wear this kind of stuff all the time, you're definitely gonna be known as one of the hottest guys in school."

My face had to be bright red, because I sure felt like it was. I had no idea how to respond to that. It just... it was completely unexpected, not to mention inappropriate. Since when did guys say that to other guys?

I fiddled with some of my books, trying to avoid Tai's gaze because it was making me extremely uncomfortable. I could feel his eyes sweeping over my body and I fought back the urge to tell him to stop looking at me. After all, I didn't want to get rid of my only friend so far. Eventually he stopped staring and moved forward, ruffling my hair a bit.

"There, now it's perfect. Honestly, you are so goddamn..." Tai trailed off and shook his head. "Anyway, remember what I've been telling you," Tai said. "Try to be casual and confident and stuff. And the worst thing you can do is act fake, though, so don't lie about who you are or anything."

The bell rang just then and Tai moved his fingers to my shirt, undoing the first two buttons. His fingers brushed my skin and I felt a little tingle run through me, which was kind of scary. He really needed to stop touching me.

"I'll wait for you after first period," Tai said. "We can walk to second together. At lunch we'll talk. See you, okay?"

Tai flashed me a grin, slapped me on the ass briefly, and left, not giving me any time to respond. I stared after him for a moment, shocked, then closed my locker and tried to process what had just happened. Eventually I gave up, shook my head, and headed to class. Maybe I was just taking things the wrong way.

**xXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx**

At lunch, Tai and I sat at a table by ourselves secluded from the rest of the cafeteria.

"Do you have any more jeans?" he asked me.

I shook my head. "I don't think so."

"I thought so. I've got a bunch of jeans that can't fit me anymore and they'd probably look fine on you, so I brought them. They're in a bag in my locker. I put a few shirts in there, too. I want you to wear that stuff for the rest of the week, okay?"

I nodded obediently.

"Good. I brought a few more CDs for you, too. Did you listen to the Green Day one at all?"

I nodded again. "While I was finishing my homework."

"Alright, good. We're making progress."

Tai was right, his old clothing did fit me. So for the next few days, I wore them to school and felt a bit less like I stuck out. Tai kept foreshadowing that there would be some big event on Saturday, and told me to bring money with me. I was thoroughly confused, but didn't protest. I needed all the help I could get.

My father barely even blinked when he saw me walk into the kitchen in the mornings. Apparently my new attire wasn't a concern of his. My mother seemed upset, but had stopped asking. She'd settled for giving me disappointed looks when she knew I was looking.

Thursday evening, Tai called me and told me that he was going to introduce me to some of his friends the next day. Needless to say, I protested profusely. However, Tai assured me that it would be fine and told me that it was necessary. Reluctantly, I agreed. Tai also advised me to wear the jeans I'd worn on Monday. Truthfully, I think it was just because he really liked those jeans on me for whatever reason. I really had to wonder about him.

Strangely, Akira actually nodded a hello to me when I sat down in Music class on Friday. I was surprised since he hadn't seemed to like me but nodded back as casually as I could, remembering what Tai had said.

When I got to my locker after first period, Taichi was waiting there. Akira was with him- somehow he'd gotten there before me.

"Akira picked your lock," Tai said, handing me my books for English and shoving my Music things in my locker before shutting it.

"Um... thanks?" I said uncertainly.

Tai slung an arm around my shoulder and the three of us began walking down the hall.

"Matt's gonna sit with us at lunch," Tai notified Akira. "I think they'll take to him pretty well. What about you?"

Akira simply shrugged.

"I'm sure it'll be fine," Tai said, looking at me.

I didn't know what to say, so I just gave Tai a little smile.

"Fucking school," Akira muttered when we reached English class. He slouched down in his seat and put his feet up on the desk.

"Nice shirt," Tai remarked, sitting down in his seat. I sat down also and looked at Akira's shirt.

His shirt had a cartoon character on it giving the finger. In writing beneath it was "Just a Reflex".

"You're gonna get kicked out," Tai said matter-of-factly, tilting his chair back.

Akira snorted. "That's why I'm wearing it."

People began to arrive and Mr. Terada began the lesson, so Tai and Akira were forced to end their discussion (if you could call it that). Mr. Terada looked straight at Akira a few times but said nothing about the shirt, which I found surprising.

During the lesson I observed Akira and Tai's behaviour in class. Tai would make a remark or crack a joke every so often, and Mr. Terada would roll his eyes and sometimes even joke back. He definitely wasn't like most teachers I'd encountered. Akira just sat there the whole time, smirking or snickering whenever there was something funny. Sometimes he took out a lighter and flicked it on and off in his desk. Mr. Terada either didn't notice or didn't care. I kind of hoped it wasn't the latter.

Lunchtime rolled around and I became nervous. If Tai's friends hated me, everything would be ruined. He'd probably stop hanging out with me, too, which would mean I'd be on my own again. Obviously I didn't want that to happen.

Super-sized butterflies had gathered in my stomach and were having some sort of a party. I took a deep breath and let it out as we walked into the cafeteria, self-consciously running a hand through my hair.

"You look fine," Tai said, taking note of my actions. "Don't worry."

I nodded absently, concentrating on calming down. Tai pushed open the doors to the cafeteria and we walked inside. Quite a few people said hi to Tai while we were walking through the cafeteria and he introduced me briefly. I smiled faintly at them and nodded, barely hearing their names or seeing what they looked like. I was too focused on the thought of sitting with Tai's friends.

Finally, Tai stopped at a table. Various boys and girls were seated there and I swallowed the nervous lump in my throat, reminding myself that this was it. I **had** to make a good impression.

"This is Yamato," Tai announced. "Yamato, meet... well, everyone."

Everyone either nodded or said "hey" to me, smiling. Apparently I'd been worried over nothing.

"Hey, Tai!" came a familiar voice. "Who's your cute friend?"

Tai and I turned around to find Mimi standing there.

"Yamato!" Mimi exclaimed, her face brightening. "Hi!"

"You know Mimi?" Tai asked me, confused.

"We met last Wednesday," Mimi explained to him. "You were away."

"Cool," Tai said with a shrug, then sat down at the table. I sat beside him, and Mimi sat on the other side of me.

I did feel a little awkward, seeing as I didn't know anyone at the table except for Tai, Akira, and Mimi, but nobody seemed fazed at all by my presence. I guess I'd been making a big deal out of nothing.

Time flew by and soon we were finished lunch and science class had just started. The teacher told us to get a partner for an experiment. Luckily Tai chose me right away.

Akira, as I mentioned before, was in that class. Hazel, one of their other friends, was also in the class. Akira and Hazel decided to be partners.

"Now pair up with another group of two," Mr. Warubi instructed. "When you have your group of four, go to a station and wait for further instruction."

Each "station" had a small counter, a sink, and four stools. Akira, Hazel, Taichi, and I paired up and sat at one of the stations.

"This class sucks," Akira announced. "I hate school."

Tai rolled his eyes. "Now tell us something we **don't** know."

"Today," Mr. Warubi said, "we will be dissecting frogs. You will complete this task in the groups that you are in."

Hazel wrinkled her nose. "Dissecting frogs? Aren't they supposed to warn us or something so we can fake being sick?"

"Each member of the group must participate," Mr. Warubi continued. "You will be marked on the following..." He began to list several things.

"Whatever," Hazel said, rolling her eyes. "There's no way I'm cutting up a frog."

Tai shrugged. "Us guys'll do it, then."

"I'll hand out the supplies and guide you through the first step," Mr. Warubi went on. "Then you must follow the directions on the sheets I'll be handing out right now. When you are finished, begin writing up your report which will be due Monday."

Tai groaned. "A report?"

"Screw this," Akira said, poking the frog with a pencil. "Let's just tear it open."

"Gross!" Hazel declared. "I hope you guys know I'm not touching that thing."

"It's just a frog," Tai said.

"And that would be fine if we weren't going to cut it open!" Hazel exclaimed.

Mr. Warubi began to "guide" the class through the first step. Most groups ignored him and decided to figure it out for themselves.

"So, Matt," Hazel asked me, "do you like it here?"

I nodded and was surprised to find that I kind of meant it. Since Kouji had stopped bothering me, being in Kukachi was actually okay.

"Cool. You pull off that outfit really well, by the way. If you weren't so hot, it wouldn't look half as good."

"Thanks, I guess," I tried to focus on not blushing, but it didn't work.

Hazel giggled at me. "I like him, Tai. He's cute."

My blush darkened and Tai grinned.

"I thought so too."

...wait, was he calling me cute? What the hell?

"So what do we do first to this frog?" Tai asked, and I was forced to dismiss my thoughts.

Akira flicked on his lighter and smirked. "I can think of a few things."

Hazel laughed.

"I dare you," Tai said, grinning.

Akira shrugged. "Okay."

He flicked his lighter on and then held the flame against the frog's skin. We all cracked up, then quieted down when Mr. Warubi looked over at us suspiciously.

"That was mean," Hazel accused, still laughing quietly.

"It's already dead," Akira snorted.

"But still!" Hazel protested.

Akira rolled his eyes.

"Hurry up and slice it," Hazel said to Tai. "The sooner we're done with it, the better."

"Get Akira to do it," Tai said. "He's chopped up a few frogs before."

Akira snorted a laugh and Hazel looked at them in disbelief.

"You guys are horrible! The poor frog!"

That just made them laugh harder.

Hazel shook her head and turned to me. "They're a bit mentally retarded. You'll get used to it."

"Hey!" Tai exclaimed, grinning. "I'm normal! Right, Matt?"

I pretended to think for a moment. "Well..."

Hazel laughed, Akira smirked, and Tai looked at me in mock surprise but his expression eventually melted back into a grin.

I was actually beginning to feel like I was fitting in a bit.

**xXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx**

The rest of the day went just as well. Right before I was about to leave for my house after school, Tai approached me at my locker.

"I was right," he said with a grin, "everyone loves you."

"Really?" I couldn't believe it.

"Yup. I'll call you tonight, okay? We can figure out plans for tomorrow."

"Okay. So you really think they like me?"

"I **know** they do. Most mentioned how hot you are, too." Tai grinned at me.

I tried to ignore the look he was giving me, changing the subject. "Don't forget to call me, okay?"

"I won't. See ya."

"Bye."

**xXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx**

Tai called at around 8:30. As it happened, I was babysitting Amaya again but had already put her to bed. My parents had, again, neglected to tell me where they were going.

"So about tomorrow," Tai brought the subject up. "Do you need a ride here?"

"I'm not sure."

"I'll pick you up. My dad starts work late tomorrow anyway. Is noon good, like last time?"

"Sure."

"Alright, cool. You're sleeping over, right?"

"Yeah."

"Good."

There was silence for a moment, then Tai started humming under his breath. I realized after a few moments that he was humming the tune of the song that was playing on my stereo.

"You can hear the music?" I asked, a bit surprised. I'd turned the music down low because Amaya was sleeping.

"Not well, but I know the songs by heart. Why?"

"I just have to make sure it's not too loud because my cousin is sleeping."

"Oh."

I fiddled with the stitching on my comforter, thinking for a moment. Then I asked Tai a question I'd been wanting to ask.

"Is Kouji like that to everyone?"

Tai hesitated. "Well... not everyone. He's got the guys who follow him around and help him pummel kids, and he doesn't treat them as bad. He's got his favorite people to pick on, and some kids he just ignores and they've never even gotten an insult from him."

"Has he ever picked on **you**?"

Tai didn't answer for a moment. And when he did, his voice sounded different... almost uncomfortable.

"We'll talk about that later, okay?"

I was confused, but who was I to question his motives? "Okay."

When Tai and I got off the phone, I packed a bag with the things I'd need for sleeping over at Tai's house. I had only a few last-minute things that I'd have to pack in the morning.

By the time my parents got home I was already asleep, so I didn't get to ask them where they'd been. I woke up several times during the night, and it took a while to get back to sleep each time. I couldn't wait for the morning, when I could wake up once and for all.

**xXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx**

I was exhausted when my alarm went off the next morning. I'd barely gotten any sleep, what with my constant waking up. Normally I'd go back to sleep, but I had to get up since Tai was picking me up at noon.

It was 11:30 when I was done getting ready and packing the last few things. Tai arrived at my house on time again, exactly at 12:00. I said goodbye to my parents and Amaya while Tai said hi, then I got my bag and we left.

"Hello, Mr. Yagami," I said, getting into the car.

"Hi, Yamato," he responded. "Tai blackmailed you into sleeping over, huh?"

"Not this time," Tai said with a grin. "This one came of his own free will."

I laughed.

Tai's dad dropped us at the apartment, then went to work. Mrs. Yagami was out shopping with a friend, and Kari was sitting in the living room watching TV with Mikomi.

Mikomi's eyes lit up when she saw us.

"Hi, Tai!" she chirped. "Hi, Matt!"

"Hi, Matt," Kari echoed. "You're sleeping over, right?"

I nodded. "Yeah."

"I am too!" Mikomi exclaimed brightly.

Tai rolled his eyes, then turned to me. "Come on," he said, "we've got a lot of stuff to do."

Tai and I went to his room and I put my bag down. He threw me some clothes.

"Put these on. Don't ask, just do."

Shrugging, I went into the bathroom and changed into the clothes, which were slightly loose jeans, a black shirt, and a grey hooded zip-up sweater; similar to the things he'd been having me wear for the past week.

Tai looked up when I walked into the room and nodded his approval.

"Good. You look good. You're really thin, too, all the clothes I've been giving you are too small for me." He laughed. "Anyway, you brought money, right?"

"Yeah, why-"

"Come on," he said, leading me to the front hall and not letting me finish my question. "Get on your shoes."

"Where are we going?"

"You'll see."

Tai went into the living room. "Hey, Kari, wanna come?"

"Where?" Kari asked.

Tai whispered something in her ear and her eyes lit up. "Sure!" She in turn whispered something to Mikomi, who squealed. "Of course!"

Soon the four of us were sitting on a bus, off to who-knows-where.

"This is gonna be so much fun!" Mikomi squealed. Kari and Tai rolled their eyes at each other.

"Can I please know where we're going?" I demanded.

"Nope," Tai refused. "You'll see when we get there."

I sighed and leaned back, blocking out Mikomi's endless chatter. _Great._

**xXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx**

"The mall?" I asked in disbelief.

"Yup," Tai said, holding one of the doors open for the rest of us.

"Why?" I asked suspiciously.

Tai grinned. "Step two, or whatever, of transforming you."

"What?"

"Trust me, okay?" Tai didn't wait for an answer. "Kar, which store do you think we should go in first?"

"Blueprints," Kari said immediately. "It's a huge store, we can find at least a few outfits there."

We entered Blueprints and Tai, Mikomi, and Kari began looking around and piling clothing into my arms.

"You probably look good in every color," Tai remarked, "so it really doesn't matter what colors we get, right?"

"Uh..."

"Oh, this is perfect!" Mikomi exclaimed. "Don't you love it?"

"I guess..."

"Which one do you like better?" Kari asked, holding up two shirts.

"Um..."

I was relieved when they finally stopped picking out clothes and shoved me into a changing room. Of course, it was going to take forever to try everything on.

I looked at all the clothes and silently groaned. It was going to be a long day.

**xXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx**

I let out a heavy sigh and leaned back, closing my eyes.

"You guys are insane."

Tai laughed. "Tired?"

"I've been trying on clothes all day. Need I say more?"

Tai nodded. "True. And we're not finished yet."

I groaned.

It was three o' clock. Kari, Mikomi, Tai, and I were sitting at a table in the food court after hours of shopping.

"I'm having pizza," Mikomi decided after looking around at the food choices.

"I'll have pizza too," Kari said. "What about you guys?"

"Actually, pizza sounds good," Tai said. "You want pizza, Matt?"

"Sure."

"Why don't you guys tell us what kind of pizza you want," Kari suggested, "and Mikomi and I will go get all of it? It makes no sense for all four of us to go to the same place.

So we told them what we wanted, gave them our money, and they went to get the food.

"Man, that's a lot of clothes," Tai said. "Do you even have any money left?"

I nodded.

"Really? Where'd all that money come from?"

"Allowance, mostly. I didn't have anything to spend it on for a while, so it piled up."

"How much allowance do you get?" Tai asked in surprise.

"About forty dollars a week," I said.

Tai gaped at me. "What the hell kind of chores do you do?"

"None, really," I said with a shrug. "Except sometimes babysitting Amaya. I never have to clean my room because it's always clean, and making my bed isn't really a chore."

Tai shook his head. "Man. I get, like, ten bucks if I'm lucky."

"Really?" I asked, genuinely surprised.

"Yeah! Forty bucks a week is unheard of around here!" Tai shook his head again. "Wow. Half of us don't even get allowance at all."

"We got the food!" Mikomi announced, setting down two trays on the table and sitting down. Kari placed the other two trays down and also sat.

"Food!" Tai said happily, taking a bit of pizza.

Kari rolled her eyes. "Are you ever **not** hungry, Tai?"

Tai stuck his tongue out at her, and Mikomi giggled.

"I'm thinking we should change up the style a little," Tai said. "I mean, not very much, but..."

Tai leaned forward and whispered to Mikomi and Kari. Mikomi squealed and Kari grinned.

"Whatever you say."

I eyed them warily. Uh oh.

**xXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx**

"I'm not coming out!"

"C'mon, Matt," Tai tried to reason with me. "It can't be **that** bad!"

"It **is**!" I insisted, looking again in the mirror.

I was wearing very tight dark blue jeans with a slight fade on the front and a black long-sleeved shirt that was a bit too tight for my liking. There was no way I would wear it in public.

"Just come out!" exclaimed Tai.

I sighed in defeat, opening the door and stepping out.

There was silence. The three of them stared at me and I just knew they must be holding in laughter.

"Go ahead and laugh," I said miserably. "I know I look ridiculous."

Tai shook his head slowly. "No, Matt. Actually, you look really good."

"Yeah," Kari agreed, nodding, and Mikomi responded with a "wow". She looked stunned. Actually, they all did.

I felt my cheeks start to turn red. "Stop staring at me!" I exclaimed, embarrassed.

They all snapped out of it and Tai grinned at me.

"You're gonna be able to have anyone you want."

"You're one of the hottest guys I've ever seen," Mikomi said sincerely.

"I can't believe you're so thin," Kari put in.

I blushed at their remarks. "So it looks ok?"

"Better than okay!" exclaimed Tai. "We've gotta get you some more clothes like this!"

We walked out of that store with many more bags. Several outfits were inside, including ones that I highly doubted I'd ever wear of my own free will. I wanted to leave the mall after that but Tai insisted that I needed shoes. We went into a shoe store and they picked out a bunch of shoes for me to try.

"You have pretty small feet," Tai commented as I began trying on shoes.

"So?"

"So you know what they say." He grinned.

Obviously Kari and Mikomi also knew "what they said", because they started giggling like crazy. I rolled my eyes at Tai, but couldn't stop myself from blushing.

"Whatever."

"I'm just stating a fact! I, on the other hand, have pretty big feet..."

"Ew!" Kari squealed. "I didn't need a mental image of that!"

**xXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx**

I was exhausted when we got back to Tai's house.

"Good night," I muttered, collapsing onto his bed.

He chuckled. "Yeah right. We've still got stuff to do."

I looked at him in disbelief. "Are you kidding?"

"We still need to work on some stuff," he responded. "Get up."

"You're fucking insane," I groaned.

Tai raised an eyebrow at me, looking a little surprised, and I realized that my attitude had probably shocked him. I couldn't blame him; I wasn't one to swear much... or at all, really, depending who I was around. After all, I was supposed to be 'proper'.

"Wow," Tai said, shaking his head. "I didn't know you had that in you."

I shrugged, not knowing what to say.

Tai tilted his head and studied me for a moment, then shook his head again and smiled.

"You know... this isn't as hard as I thought it'd be."

"What do you mean?" I asked him.

"I mean... well, I guess I kinda prejudged you just like you prejudged me. I figured you'd be all prim and proper and use big words and stuff... basically, I figured it would be almost like you were from a different world. But there really isn't that much difference between you and I."

"I was thinking the same thing," I confessed. "I mean, that we would be like aliens to each other."

"Yeah... but now that you've got some casual clothes and stuff, you're gonna blend in so easily it's crazy. I mean- except for the fact that you're easily one of the hottest guys in school."

I just shrugged, trying to dismiss the subject. I could feel my face heating up a bit and tried to think of a way to change the subject. Unfortunately, I wasn't quick enough.

"I'm serious," Tai insisted, and I looked up to meet his eyes. The look on his face sent a shiver through me.

"Whatever," I muttered, my eyes flickering away from him. I desperately needed to change the subject, and fast.

"Honestly. Do you not know how hot you are?"

"Can we change the subject?" I asked abruptly.

Tai gave me a strange look. "Sure..."

Luckily he didn't ask why and we moved on to other topics. I could only hope that Tai had gotten the hint and wouldn't call me 'hot' or anything again. Because, really, there were only two valid reasons for him to say it so openly: either he was gay, or he was very comfortable with his sexuality.

I hoped it was the latter. I mean, not that I'm homophobic or anything, but... well, there was no way I'd feel comfortable around him if he actually **was** gay.

...especially with the way he kept looking at me.

**xXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx**

It was later that evening and Tai's parents were going out.

"I still don't think we should leave you kids alone," Tai's mom said, looking unsure.

Mr. Yagami rolled his eyes. "There's four of them, they'll be fine. As long as they behave and don't trash the house, that is."

"Us?" Tai asked in mock-disbelief, widening his eyes innocently.

Mr. Yagami ignored his son. "We'll be spending the night at a hotel. Do not invite your friends over and have a party, because we **will** know if you do."

"We won't," Kari and Tai said in unison.

"Don't forget to lock up," Mrs. Yagami said worriedly. "Don't answer the door to strangers, and-"

"Don't worry," Tai cut in, ushering her out the door. "We won't burn down the house because we're ordering pizza, and we'll call the police if we see or hear anything out of the ordinary. Have fun, bye!"

Tai shut and locked the door, then sighed.

"Finally!" he exclaimed.

"Tell me about it," Kari agreed. "Let's order the pizza and rent some videos."

"Good idea," Tai said. "The night is young. Let the fun begin!"

**xXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx**


	5. Full Speed Ahead

A/N: Matt, Tai, and Akira's second semester schedules for future reference:

Matt: Math, World Religions, Art, Lunch, Phys Ed  
Tai: Tech, History, Art, Lunch, Phys Ed  
Akira: World Religions, History, Art, Lunch, Math

DISCLAIMER: I don't own Digimon or rights to any of the characters, I am not making a profit from this, etc.

**Kukachi  
VI: Full Speed Ahead  
**by: neo-chan

Tai ordered the pizza and left Kari the money to pay for it. He and I put on our shoes and began our walk to the video store, which was right across the street. We chatted lightly on the way over, and I was glad that my discomfort from earlier that night had disappeared. Maybe I was just being paranoid.

"What kind of movies are we renting?" I inquired as we entered the video store.

Tai shrugged. "Anything that looks good. Mikomi will be happy just watching a movie with us, and Kari will give anything a chance."

I nodded and started looking around at the videos. I really didn't care what we got, as long as it wasn't a horror. Not that I'll admit it aloud, but scary movies honestly do scare me. Luckily Tai ruled the horror genre out almost instantly.

"We can't get any scary movies," he said. "Mikomi will use it as an excuse to cling onto us. And I'm not watching any stupid romance movie. If we watch a sad movie, my sister and Mikomi will be bawling their eyes out. It'll be torture. That leaves, what? Comedy, action, mystery, and suspense?"

"Drama," I reminded him. "And Fantasy."

"Drama movies always turn out to be chick flicks," Tai said. I didn't think that was true, but whatever. "Fantasy and Sci-Fi are usually pretty lame, but they could be good for a laugh."

"Well, we have to pick the movies soon," I pointed out. "Let's just choose and go."

"We could always get porn," Tai mused.

I snapped my head up to look at him, shocked that he'd even suggested it, then realized he was joking. I looked at his smirking face and hit him on the shoulder. "Idiot."

He shrugged, still smirking.

We ended up leaving the video store with three movies; one comedy, one suspense, and one action.

"Let's stop in here," Tai said, guiding me into a store in that plaza. "We need snacks."

I rolled my eyes, but let him drag me inside. That was a big mistake.

**xXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx**

"Pizza come yet?" Tai asked as he and I entered the apartment with several bags.

"It came a few minutes ago," Kari replied. "Where were you two?"

Tai put the ice cream in the freezer and we put the rest of the bags full of chocolate, candy, and chips in the living room.

Kari rolled her eyes. "Never mind, I should've known. Well, we just started eating. Hurry or we won't leave any for you."

"Yeah right," Tai muttered, but sat down on the couch with a plate immediately.

"What movies did you get?" Kari asked as she bit into a pizza slice.

"Look in the bag," Tai said distractedly, eating like he hadn't eaten in days.

Kari took out the movies and began debating with Mikomi which one we should watch first. Eventually they decided that we should watch the comedy first, then the action one, then the suspense. So we put in the comedy and got comfortable.

The movie was hilarious, and it put everyone in more or less of a good mood. It didn't help that we were pigging out on junk food and that Mikomi was definitely on a sugar high. By the time the movie finished, Mikomi was practically bouncing off the walls. Kari somehow managed to get her to change into her pajamas, but that didn't lower her energy in the least.

Mikomi's pajamas consisted of a light blue tank top and pajama bottoms that were checkered with different shades of blue. She'd clasped her hair back and had blue fuzzy slippers on. Kari was wearing a pair of pajama pants that were purple-and-red striped and a red tank top with red socks. Tai simply had on a pair of shorts and a grey tank top, whereas I wore grey and white checkered pajama pants and a white t-shirt.

"Let's go for a walk!" Mikomi exclaimed just before we were about to put in the second movie.

"Dressed like this?" I asked skeptically.

"Of course! That's half the fun!"

Kari and Tai agreed, so I gave in and said yes too. Since it was cold out, Tai changed into a pair of black sweatpants, then grabbed a sweater for himself and another for me. Kari slipped on a fitted white-and-red sweater, and Mikomi only grabbed a scarf. We stuck our feet in our shoes (Mikomi and Kari put on flip-flops) and left the house.

"Shit, it's cold," Tai remarked as we stepped out of the building.

Mikomi skipped ahead of us. "No it isn't!"

Kari zipped up her sweater, shivering. "Yes it is."

"Let's visit people's houses!" Mikomi decided. "Tai, doesn't Akira live around here?"

Tai nodded. "Right in that building up the street."

"Let's get him to come! It was hilarious last time!"

Tai turned to me. "You want to?"

"Sure," I said with a shrug.

So we ended up going to Akira's building. Tai buzzed his number and Akira picked up.

"It's me," Tai said without waiting for an answer. "You want us to come up, or...?"

"I'll come down," came Akira's voice. "Gimme a minute."

A few minutes later, Akira walked out of the elevator and entered the lobby. He opened the door for us and leaned against the door frame, blocking the entranceway.

Akira was wearing dark blue sweatpants and a black shirt. His hair was pulled back into a ponytail, but some long bangs were hanging down on one side. And his hair looked darker...

Tai squinted in the dull lighting. "Is that blue?"

Akira nodded. "Black, tinted blue."

So **that** was it. Dark blue hair sort of suited him.

Akira went on. "So what are you guys doing?"

Tai shrugged. "Just walking around."

"We're hyper," Mikomi piped up.

"**She**'s hyper," Kari corrected.

Akira nodded. "Sure, I'll come."

We set out again. I don't know how Akira and Mikomi weren't cold, but I definitely was and I had more clothing on than them.

"What is this, a pajama party?" Akira asked sarcastically.

"Matt and Mikomi have been over for a while," said Tai, ignoring Akira's tone. "They're sleeping over. We rented a bunch of movies."

"I see." Akira flicked his lighter on and off once. "You guys need to light something."

"Do you bring that **every**where?" Mikomi asked in disbelief.

"Yeah, what's the problem? You bring your lipstick everywhere."

"It's lip **gloss**, and it's important!"

Akira snorted. "Whatever."

"Let's play truth or dare," Mikomi said randomly.

"That's a seriously shitty game," Akira replied.

"Let's just play 'til we get to that complex by the pizza place," Tai suggested. "Then we'll decide what to do."

The rest of us were fine with that, and Akira agreed reluctantly.

"I pick Tai," Mikomi said, taking it upon herself to go first.

"Dare," Tai said without hesitation.

"Okay! I dare you to wear nothing but your boxers the whole time we're out here!"

"No way!" Tai protested. "I'll get frostbite or something."

"You just want to see his body," Akira said with a snort.

Mikomi blushed, but ignored Akira. "Fine, you just have to take off your shirt and sweater."

"He'll still be freezing," Kari piped up.

"Fine! Just take off your sweater!"

Tai shrugged. "Okay."

He took off his sweater and handed it to Mikomi who put it on immediately, claiming she was suddenly cold. Akira said something along the lines of "Yeah right" and Kari giggled.

"My turn now," Tai said. "And the lucky person is... Matt!"

"Truth, I guess," I decided.

"Okay... were you involved with anyone back in Rihtona?"

I thought about Madison and began to miss her and all my old friends. Kukachi was beginning to be an okay place, but... well, my heart was still in Rihtona.

"Were you?" Tai pressed. "Judging by the look on your face, I'd say yes."

I hesitated. "Yeah... kind of."

"Kind of? What's that supposed to mean?" Kari asked.

"It means he doesn't want to admit it," Akira said, rolling his eyes.

"That's not true!" I protested.

"Well, you were either going out or you weren't. Which one is it?"

"I don't know!" I exclaimed. "I mean, she said we were, but it's not like we kissed or anything!"

I stopped and blushed a bit, realizing that I'd probably said too much.

Akira snorted. "You were a couple and you didn't kiss?"

"A girlfriend, huh?" Tai mused, stressing the 'girl' part.

It didn't click at first and by the time it did, the girls were asking me questions and it got pushed to the back of my mind.

"Did you dump her?" Mikomi asked.

"Or did she dump you?" added Kari.

"No one dumped anyone!" I exclaimed, desperately wanting to put a stop to the conversation.

Akira laughed mockingly. "So you really expect her to be waiting for you if you ever go back?"

"He's right, you know," Tai agreed. "She won't just wait for you."

"Especially if she's pretty," Mikomi put in.

"Let's get on with the game," I mumbled, changing the subject. "Mikomi, truth or dare?"

They were really starting to depress me. First they'd made me think of how I missed my friends, then told me that my girlfriend pretty much didn't care about me anymore and would go off and find a new boyfriend just like that.

"Dare," Mikomi said.

"I dare you to..." I racked my brain quickly. "...kiss Akira on the lips."

It was the first thing I thought of, since she and Akira seemed to have some sort of weird chemistry. Mikomi turned red and the Yagami siblings laughed.

"Good one," Tai said with a grin.

Mikomi stood on her tiptoes and, blushing more, gave Akira a quick peck on the lips.

"That doesn't count," Kari said with a grin. "Do it again. And do it right this time or you have to add tongue!"

Mikomi growled under her breath but did it again, keeping her lips on Akira's for a few seconds.

"I'll get you back," she vowed, giving me a mock-glare. "Anyway, I choose Kari."

"Dare," said Kari.

"Perfect. I dare you to kiss Matt."

"No fair!" I protested, though in every aspect it really was fair.

Tai mock-glared at me. "Don't you dare try to seduce my baby sister!"

"At least now **some**one will have kissed him," Akira remarked.

I didn't want to start a fight, so I kept quiet and ignored his comment.

"I accept that dare," Kari said, then rose onto her tiptoes and...

...kissed my cheek.

"You never said lips," Kari pointed out with a grin, looking at all of our shocked faces.

I started laughing, and Tai snickered.

"Sorry, Mikomi, but it's true. You never said it had to be lips."

"It's not fair!" Mikomi cried.

"It's perfectly fair," Kari corrected, still grinning. "So, Akira, what's it gonna be?"

Akira snorted. "Dare."

"Well, since you're probably dying to use that lighter, I dare you to light something on fire."

Akira seemed satisfied. "Good."

I gaped at Akira as he began climbing a tree half-way while we began walking slowly.

"He's really going to do it?" I asked in disbelief.

"Of course!" said Tai. "Keep walking, it's less suspicious."

Akira lit a few branches and leaves on fire, then jumped down and lit the grass around the tree, also burning a bit of the bark. He then came over the corner we'd stopped at and smirked.

"Three... two... one."

The flames shot up and clashed together. A few people across the street stopped and stared. One began to run back into a store they'd come out of and another took out their cell phone.

"Time to go," Akira said, then bolted.

We all ran, Kari and Mikomi stumbling a bit in their flip-flops at first but then taking them off and running without them.

We turned every corner we encountered for several blocks. When we arrived at a park next to a forest, we finally stopped.

"I think I got a cut," Kari groaned, slipping her sandals back on.

"Only one?" Mikomi asked. She sat on a swing and rubbed her feet, wincing.

"I can't believe you did that!" I exclaimed in disbelief.

Akira shrugged. "Why not?"

"Because! It's dangerous!"

Akira rolled his eyes. "It's not like we held up a bank or anything." What the hell did you do for fun back in your little town, play tennis?" Akira asked sarcastically.

I knew better than to answer that truthfully. "No, we just don't go around lighting things on fire for fun!"

"Well, good for you," Akira said, rolling his eyes. "I'm sure your mother is very proud."

"What's that supposed to mean?" I asked, narrowing my eyes slightly.

"Don't fight, you two," Kari reprimanded, but Akira ignored her.

"It means you're a fucking prep who's been pampered and spoiled your whole life and that you should go back to where you came from."

I stared at Akira in shock. Tai stepped in quickly.

"Akira, stop-"

"Don't fucking tell me what to do! You know this little pussy will never fit in."

I don't usually have a short temper-or much at all, really-but Akira was going too far. I was trying hard to change and fit in, and he was trying to sabotage all that work? I couldn't allow him to do that.

"Will you just fuck off?" I exploded.

Tai, Mikomi, and Kari looked shocked. Akira looked surprised for a moment, too, then lunged forward and tackled me to the ground. My head hit the ground pretty hard, but I didn't get time to think about that because Akira was on top of me a second later. He managed to get a punch in before Tai hauled him off of me, so Mikomi and Kari began fussing over me but I wasn't listening to a word they said. Tai had pulled Akira a few feet away and was exchanging a few angry words with him, which I couldn't hear clearly. A few moments later, Akira shoved Tai and began stalking across the street. Tai yelled something after him and Akira turned and gave Tai the finger.

Shaking his head, Tai came back over to us. He knelt beside me, looking pissed off.

"Are you okay?"

I nodded, gingerly touching my face. Before I could protest, Tai was caressing the back of my head.

"I'm fine," I insisted, hoping he would get the hint and stop touching me.

Tai sighed. "Akira's an ass sometimes. I'm sorry."

Tai still hadn't removed his hand- in fact, he was rubbing his thumb along my jaw. Obviously, this made me quite uncomfortable and again, I tried to stress that I was okay.

"Tai, really, I'm fine."

"You sure? Akira punches pretty hard, I know from experience."

"Yes, I'm sure."

Tai finally moved his hand and I was relieved. Having Tai touch me was so... unnerving.

"Where did Akira go?" Mikomi asked.

"Who the fuck cares," Tai muttered, helping me up.

Mikomi got the hint and didn't ask again. Tai insisted that we should head back, so we began the walk back to Tai's house. A few minutes later, Mikomi spoke.

"When we get back to the house we should continue the game, even though Akira's gone."

"We'll see," was Tai's dismissive response.

**xXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx**

When we got back to Tai's house, he made me sit down on the couch and offered to get me a drink. I understood him being concerned-my head **had** hit the ground really hard-but honestly, he was overreacting.

"Tai, I'm fine!" I exclaimed.

He looked skeptical.

"Are we gonna continue the game?" asked Mikomi.

Tai cast a glance at me, looking hesitant. Honestly, he was acting like I was crippled or something!

"Let's play," I said, nodding. Mikomi turned to Tai and, after a moment, he sighed in defeat.

"Fine."

"Okay," Kari said, "who's going first?"

"I will," I volunteered. "Mikomi, truth or dare?"

"I'll go with truth this time."

"Great." I grinned. "Do you like Akira?"

Mikomi blushed. "Kind of," she admitted, playing with her hair.

Tai's eyebrows shot up. "**What**?"

"I said **kind of**," Mikomi tried to hedge.

"**Akira**?" Tai exclaimed. He turned to me. "How did you know?"

I shrugged. "I could tell."

"Is it obvious?" Mikomi asked worriedly.

"Not **that** obvious," I told her reassuringly.

"I can't believe it," Tai said, still shocked. "**Akira**?"

"Okay, my turn!" Mikomi said, avoiding the subject. "Tai, truth or dare?"

"**Akira**?"

"I said, truth or dare?"

"Dare."

Mikomi's eyes lit up, and I got a bad feeling.

"Great," she said, grinning wickedly. "Now I can get Matt back for real!"

"Uh oh," Kari said, seemingly knowing what was coming.

Mikomi smirked evilly.

"Tai, I dare you to kiss Matt. On the lips."

I stared at Mikomi in shock. She couldn't be serious.

"And this can't be some quick little peck," Mikomi added. "I'm talking about a **real** kiss."

"You know I'm gonna have to get you back badly after this," I warned Mikomi.

She shrugged. "Let the war continue!"

"And you have no problems with this?" I exclaimed, looking at Tai.

He shrugged. "Why should I?"

I stared at him in shock. Did that mean he really **was** gay? Or did he just not care because he was straight and extremely comfortable with his sexuality?

"C'mon, hurry it up!" Mikomi exclaimed. "Get on with the action!"

Tai rolled his eyes and, before I could get up, moved so that one knee was resting on the couch on either side of me. The same went for his arms.

"Ooh," teased Kari. "A bit anxious, are we?"

I blushed and opened my mouth to say something, but was cut off by Tai's mouth on mine. I was too shocked to move or kiss back at first, then timidly returned the kiss for a second or two awkwardly in order for the dare to count. Tai broke the kiss and got off of me, rolling his eyes.

"You could've kissed back a little more, y'know."

I blushed more. "You could've **warned** me!"

"So, did you like it?" Mikomi teased.

"If he did, he would've kissed back," Tai said, his voice having some sort of undertone to it. "Anyway, truth or dare, Kar?"

I tried not to focus on the fact that I'd just had a guy kiss me. A guy who was very possibly gay. Oh God, what if he thought **I** was gay?

No, I was just being paranoid. I tried to calm myself down, tuning back into the game.

"Truth," Kari said. "Dares are becoming very evil."

"Truth can be, too. Does Mikomi have a crush on any other friends of mine, and if so, who? Myself and Matt not included."

"No!" Mikomi shrieked. "No fair!"

Kari laughed. "You're busted, Mikomi."

Mikomi buried her face in a pillow, groaning.

"That many, huh?" Tai asked.

"Yup," Kari said, then began listing them.

When Kari was done, Tai stared at Mikomi for a long time in awe.

"Wow. I didn't know it was possible to like that many people!"

"You're evil," was all Mikomi said.

"Alright, it's my turn," Kari said. "Matt, truth or dare?"

"Truth," I said without hesitation.

"Well, I might as well keep up the evil streak... If you had to pick, who would you rather date and why: Tai or Akira? And I'm talking about looks here."

I stared at Kari for a long moment before finally speaking.

"...what? I can't... they're both guys!"

"So?"

"So I'm not gay!" I exclaimed.

A silence enveloped the room for a long moment, then Tai spoke.

"Let's just watch the movie."

There was a bit of tension in the room, but it dissolved as we watched the rest of the movies. How else had they expected me to react? Did they honestly think I was gay?

I fell asleep during the last movie and Tai woke me up when it ended, then kicked Mikomi and Kari out of the living room because we were going to be sleeping there.

"I figure it's more comfortable here than the floor of my room," Tai said.

I nodded in agreement. Tai took a few pillows and a bunch of blankets from the hall closet and brought them into the living room and we got comfortable on the couches after turning the lights out.

"Night," Tai said.

"Good night," I replied, closing my eyes.

**xXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx**

I woke up on Sunday morning before Tai did, to the smell of cooking. Curious, I craned my neck to peer into the kitchen. Mrs. Yagami must have sensed that I was awake, because she turned and smiled brightly.

"Good morning, Yamato!"

"Good morning, Mrs. Yagami," I said with a smile.

"I'm making a big breakfast for you kids, I hope you're hungry!"

I was still the only one awake when Mrs. Yagami had finished making breakfast. She went and woke up Kari and Mikomi, who in turn woke up Tai. Luckily, the food was much more edible than the first time I'd tasted Mrs. Yagami's cooking. The four of us ate and then retreated to the living room to watch some TV. We spent a few hours relaxing; flipping through channels and chatting. After a while, I decided to go home since I assumed my parents would be expecting me around that time.

Mikomi decided to stay at the Yagami's for some time longer, so I said goodbye to her and Kari and left with Tai and his mother. Mrs. Yagami drove me home, and I thanked her and said goodbye to Tai when we reached my house. I unlocked the door and entered, waved again to Tai and his mom, then stepped in and locked the door again.

The house seemed vacant, and I frowned.

"Hello?" I called. There was no response.

I wandered into the kitchen and found a note laying on the counter. To sum it up, it basically stated that my parents had gone out and had left Amaya with a babysitter.

A babysitter? Why hadn't they just called me? In Rihtona we could have asked a relative or a friend of the family to look after Amaya if I couldn't for some reason. Amaya had never been with someone that she didn't know.

My parents had left the address and phone number of the babysitter, so I took it upon myself to go and pick Amaya up as soon a possible; which was just minutes after I got home.

Because I didn't know my way around Kukachi, I had to call an operator in order to figure out how to get to the babysitter's house. It took me a little while, but I finally reached it. The babysitter lived in a townhouse complex, a rather run-down one at that. I wondered how in the world my parents could leave Amaya there and feel secure.

I rang the doorbell and waited. A muffled voice came from inside the door, and as it neared I made out the laugh of someone. The door swung open and standing there was a young girl, probably about seventeen or eighteen years old, with dirty blonde hair. Her hair had streaks of black and pink in it, and her green eyes studied me critically. She was dressed in a white ribbed tank top, jeans with a rip at the knee, and a red sweater. I guess I must have been staring, because she raised an eyebrow at me.

"Can I help you?" she asked in a rude tone of voice.

I frowned. "Yes, my cousin Amaya-"

"Oh, good, you're here to pick up the kid. I've got things to do and places to see."

I was shocked, but relief flooded my shock when Amaya came running up to the door. Not wasting time, I took Amaya's hand and thanked the babysitter-though I doubt she deserved it-, then left.

Amaya seemed happy enough, which I was glad for. At least the babysitter hadn't treated her badly, although I doubt she'd treated her very well. Anyhow, when we reached my house again, I gave Amaya a snack and then she went up to her room to play with some dolls.

The exams for our first semester classes were scheduled for January 27th until January 31st. Since that was about a week and a half away, I decided to spend the rest of the day looking over my notes. The week to come would basically be a review week and so I would get plenty of time to study then, but I wanted to make sure that I kept up my marks. Besides, there wasn't much else for me to do.

Tai called later on in the day and advised me on what to wear the next day. He said that I really didn't need help and that it was the last time he was going to help me with my wardrobe. This was alright with me; I could handle picking out a simple outfit by then.

"Listen," Tai said to me while we were on the phone, "Akira's kind of holding a grudge towards you, so things might be a little tense for a couple of days."

"Oh." I didn't know what to say. "Um... okay."

"So, basically, I'm not gonna be hanging around him. He's still pissed at me for defending you anyway. So I'll probably be hanging with you even more."

"Oh." That was all I could say, again. I felt kind of guilty for causing a fight between Tai and Akira, but it was Akira's fault in the first place since he'd picked on me.

I felt much different that Monday than I had the previous Monday, or the Monday before that. I felt more comfortable walking down the school hallways and even just sitting in class. The only thing that threw me off a bit was Akira. Some of the looks he gave me sent chills down my spine.

When I got to English class, Tai was already there. He motioned for me to sit next to him, but in the seat that Akira usually sat in.

"You want me to sit there?" I asked skeptically.

"Yup."

"But... isn't that Akira's seat?"

Tai waved his hand in dismissal. "Don't worry about that. Sit down!"

I did, but nervously. However, when Akira entered the classroom, he barely glanced at us. He walked right by, not even acknowledging our presence.

Tai and I talked about a variety of things during class, and I was actually pretty relaxed even though I knew that Akira was probably glaring at me and giving me dirty looks the whole time. Mr. Terada eyed Tai and I a few times, but didn't say anything.

The day went well. Tai and I sat with Mimi at lunch and we had a good time. At one point I glanced across the cafeteria and saw Akira glaring at us, but he didn't confront us or anything.

On Tuesday when I got to first period, Akira was already there. He looked up when I walked in the door, then narrowed his eyes and looked away, not giving me a second glance. Courage struck me and instead of sitting in my assigned seat next to Akira, I approached a girl I recognized from Mimi's circle of friends.

"Megumi, isn't it?" I asked with a smile.

She nodded. "Yamato, right?"

I nodded and she flashed me a smile, gesturing towards the seat beside her. "Cool. Sit down."

That's when I realized that taking risks doesn't have to be so bad.

**xXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx**

Tai called me every night that week and we talked on the phone for about an hour each time. It seemed to have turned into some sort of ritual, him calling me every evening. He invited me over for the weekend, but I had to decline since the exams were to begin the following Monday. He tried to convince me that I would do fine even if I didn't study, but I still felt the need to.

For about half of the day on Saturday, I ended up hanging out with Tai. Because of that, I lost study time and therefore spent all of Sunday studying. Tai called a couple of times and distracted me, and I did take a fair amount of breaks, but I was nervous about the exams.

It turned out I had nothing to worry about. On Monday when I went to my first exam, I looked over the questions and almost sighed in relief. I had no doubt that I'd passed; it had been surprisingly easy.

The same went for all of my other exams. I had no doubt that my marks would be high. On Friday after our last exams, I went over to Tai's place and he invited me to sleep over at his place the next day. I asked my parents and they said yes, so we finalized the plans and on Saturday my father drove me to Tai's house after he returned home from work. Kari and Mikomi were there when I arrived, sitting in the living room and watching TV. They greeted me enthusiastically, especially Mikomi, and then Tai and I joined them.

We didn't do much, just hung out. There happened to be a lot of good things on TV, so we stayed up and watched them. I didn't even know I'd fallen asleep until I woke up to the feeling of someone shaking me gently. I didn't feel like moving, too comfortable, and I curled up into a little ball.

There was a chuckle. "You awake?" came a soft voice.

I groaned lightly and opened my eyes. Tai smiled at me.

"C'mon, let's go to my room. It's late."

"I'm comfortable," I mumbled in complaint.

"Yeah, well, I woke up with a stiff neck when we slept on these couches. Come on."

With a reluctant sigh, I hauled myself off of the couch and followed Tai to his room. Almost immediately, I collapsed onto his bed and crawled under the covers, getting comfortable again.

"Guess we're sharing a bed," Tai said with a snort.

I barely registered his words and was too tired to care when he laid down beside me.

"I move around while I sleep," Tai warned me.

"Okay," I murmured sleepily, only half-listening.

Tai poked me. "Hey, I'm serious. This is your warning."

"Mm-hm." I was barely conscious.

Tai chuckled. "Good night, Matt."

"Good night..."

**xXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx**

When I woke up on Sunday morning, Tai was practically on top of me. One arm was draped across my chest and his body was right up against mine. He was so close that I could feel his soft breaths and hear his faint snoring.

Needless to say, this freaked me out. Waking up with a guy cuddled up to me was **not** on my to-do list. Shifting uncomfortably, I tried to untangle myself from him. While I was doing so, he ended up waking up and therefore letting me go. Obviously I was relieved.

Tai said good morning to me and then decided to go in the shower. While he did so, I changed out of my pajamas and then sat around listening to music for a while until the mess that was Tai's room started to bug me. I got up and began organizing things, putting all the CDs in their cases and cleaning up any food lying around. Once I'd done that, I collected all of the textbooks laying around into one pile. I couldn't just stop there- I began gathering his clothes into piles also.

Before I knew it, I'd completely tidied up Tai's room. The floor was walkable, the garbage had been emptied and replaced, and things that needed to be put away had been. Also, I'd made the bed and dusted off some things.

"Whoa."

I turned and saw Tai at the doorway, a towel wrapped around his waist. He stared into the room, shaking his head in awe.

"You're crazy, you know that?"

I shrugged, a little embarrassed.

"My mom's been bugging me to clean up for months!" Tai said with a laugh.

"Well, now you don't have to."

"Guess not."

Without warning, Tai took off the towel and began to dress. I stared at him for a moment, then turned away quickly, my face feeling hot. Oh God. I'd just stared at his naked body. What the fuck was wrong with me?

Apparently Tai had noticed because once he was finished dressing, he walked over to me with a grin.

"Liked what you saw?"

I gaped at him. "What?"

Tai rolled his eyes, still grinning. "Oh, come on, I saw that look."

"What the fuck are you talking about?" Now I was getting kind of angry.

"Calm down," Tai said, giving me a strange look. His grin had faded.

"Well, you're fucking accusing me of being gay or something!" I exclaimed.

Tai stared at me for a few long seconds, then shook his head.

"...are you homophobic?"

"No," I responded immediately.

Tai raised an eyebrow skeptically.

"I'm not," I insisted.

"It seems like it. Hell, you've been acting like I'm gonna rape you every time I touch you."

"Yeah, well..." I trailed off, not knowing what to say.

Tai shook his head, looking disappointed. "I should've known you were the type. Let me guess, being gay isn't 'proper' and shit."

"I never said that-"

"No but you're thinking it, aren't you?"

"I'm not fucking homophobic!" I exclaimed.

"Then you're gay and in denial."

My jaw dropped open. "**What**?"

"It's simple. Either you're homophobic or you're not comfortable with your sexuality, which means you're potentially gay or bi. So which one is it?"

I just stared at him, not believing that he actually had the nerve to say something like that. He really did think I was gay. Oh my God.

"I'm not gay," I said stiffly.

"Well, I am." Tai folded his arms across his chest, staring at me almost challengingly. "Deal with it."

The confession hit me like a ton of bricks. Tai was really gay. Holy shit.

I sat there staring at him for what seemed like forever, then stood up and spoke.

"...I think I should leave."

So I went home. There was no way I could just stay there like nothing had happened. Knowing that Tai was gay made it so that I couldn't even feel comfortable sitting there in his room with him. I knew it was stupid but, well... I couldn't help it. Maybe I was a little homophobic.

I went home expecting to find my mother cooking in the kitchen and my father reading the newspaper. Instead, they were both sitting at the kitchen table, speaking in serious tones. When I walked in, they both went silent and looked up. That was my first cue that something was wrong.

My mother smiled grimly at me. "Hello, Yamato."

"What's wrong?" I asked immediately.

"Sit down," my father said in the same bleak voice my mother had used.

I sat down slowly, worry settling in.

"Where's Amaya?" I asked, at first thinking something had happened to her.

"In her room," my mother reassured me. "Yamato... this is about the house."

"Not just about the house," my father corrected. "It's about everything."

Was this it? Were they about to tell me the reason for our move? Why they'd been so secretive about everything?

"Yamato," my mother began, "there's been a sort of... problem. It's been troubling us for some time now."

"How long?" I inquired.

"Before we left Rihtona."

"Yamato, before you say anything," my father rushed in, "let us explain."

I said nothing, waiting, and they began.

"I had a very important client who borrowed some money from me. He gave me an ancient ring of his that had been in his family for an extremely long time. I was to give the ring back when he paid me; it was some sort of a reassurance that he would pay me. I don't know how, where, or when, but I misplaced the ring. And so, the client didn't pay me the money and threatened to sue." My father met my eyes. "That's when we decided to pack up and move here."

I stared, speechless, and my father went on.

"We left no clues or records of where we were moving. We thought everything would be alright, so we felt no need to worry you. But last Saturday, while you were at the Yagami's, your mother and I were at court. The client found us, Yamato, and the outcome is not a good one. My client demanded that I pay him the sum he lent me initially, plus a larger amount to pay for the ring. It was a very valuable, expensive ring."

I couldn't believe all that he was telling me. But he sounded like he had some more bad news.

"What are you saying?" I asked, a sick feeling in the pit of my stomach.

"Yamato... we have to move again."

**xXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx**

I stared. Had I just heard what I thought I did?

My father watched me, looking concerned. "Yamato?"

I jumped to my feet, shocking both of my parents.

"Yamato-" My mother started, but I turned and walked quickly down the hall. I heard my father call after me but I ran up the stairs and into my room, shutting the door.

My heart was racing and my head was pounding. I had never even come close to acting so disrespectfully towards my parents. I started to worry. What if I got in trouble? I'd never gotten in trouble. I was so scared.

But I had a right to be angry. How could they keep such an important thing a secret from me?

I was even more scared when my parents didn't come to my room. Were they really so mad that they didn't want to deal with me? After turning on my stereo and pressing play, I flopped down on my bed. As the first song started playing, it made me think of Tai seeing as it was his CD.

I propped myself up on my elbows and bit my lip. I knew I'd overreacted, but... well, it really did make me kind of uneasy to know that he was gay. It really shouldn't have made me so uncomfortable, but it did and I didn't know why. I shouldn't have acted so badly towards him, though... although he **had** accused me of being gay. Which I definitely wasn't.

With a sigh, I picked up the phone. I really needed someone to talk to.

The phone rang twice, then Tai picked up.

"Hello?"

"Hi, it's-"

"Matt. Yeah, I know."

There was a moment of silence, then I sighed and spoke.

"Listen... I'm sorry about earlier."

"Yeah, well... I guess I should've told you before. So... what's up?"

I was relieved that he wasn't making a big deal of it, but it just made me feel even more guilty for being such an ass to him. However, I didn't say another word about it.

"Actually," I said to him, "I'm moving again."

"What? Why?"

"Stupid reasons..."

"So, wait... are you moving out of Kukachi?"

"No, I'm still gonna be around here."

"Oh. Well, that's not so bad, then. If you were leaving I might have had to come kidnap you."

I laughed.

"Mimi's having a party this weekend," Tai mentioned. "You gonna come?"

"I'll have to see," I said. I worried for a moment that Mimi wouldn't invite me, but then I remembered how nice she was and brushed that idea away.

"Alright. Oh, hey, Akira and I made up. I just thought you might want to know."

I didn't know what to say. "That's... cool, I guess."

Suddenly there was a knock on my door, startling me.

"Crap, I have to go," I said, sitting up and turning off the music. "I'll see you tomorrow, okay?"

"Alright. See ya."

"Bye."

I hung up and called "Come in!"

The door opened and my father stood in the doorway. I watched him expectantly.

"Yamato," my father started, "we're upset over this, too. But there's nothing we can do about it."

I sighed, knowing that it was true. "I know... it's just that this is so sudden..."

"I know. We're sorry for keeping it secret from you for so long. We'll have to begin looking at apartments as soon as we can. Unfortunately, your mother and I will have to look at them while you're at school."

"Alright," I said. I really didn't care where the apartment was, or what it looked like. It would be terrible no matter what.

"We'll try to get an apartment close to your school," my father continued, "that way you won't have such a long way to walk. I'll be working a lot more and your mother will probably start working during the day and on weekends. Amaya will have to be left with a babysitter."

My little cousin with someone we didn't know at all, every single day? There was no way my parents would really let that happen. Right?

My father apologized once more, then left the room. I turned the music back on, but at a lower volume.

**xXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx**

On Monday-we had it and Tuesday off of school-, we picked up our schedules for the second semester and our report cards. Unfortunately I only had one class with Tai; two if you included lunch. Excluding lunch, Akira and I had no classes together and Akira and Tai had one class with each other. Akira and Tai went on Tuesday to change their schedules and luckily were able to. Tai and I ended up having two classes together instead of one, and Akira and Tai ended up having two. One of the classes, all of us had together.

As for marks? I got mostly high 80's, Tai got mostly 70's, and Akira had one mark in the 40's, two marks in the low 60's, and one mark in the 20's because he didn't even show up for the exam. Luckily it wasn't a mandatory course so he didn't have to repeat it, and as for the other failing grade? His teacher had bumped it up to a passing grade because they didn't want to have him in their class again.

Wednesday morning, I woke up to an empty house. I found a note in the kitchen from my mother saying that they'd gone apartment-hunting and left Amaya with a babysitter who would take her to school, and they'd need me to pick her up after school. I read the note over a few times before crumpling it up and throwing it in the garbage.

The house was eerily quiet. I got ready for school, ate a quick breakfast, then left early. I got to school pretty early but, luckily, Tai was at his locker when I arrived so I wasn't alone.

"Hey," Tai greeted me, and I noticed his eyes sweep quickly over my body before meeting my eyes. I tried not to let it get to me but, really, it did make me uncomfortable that every time I wore something that even remotely outlined my figure, he looked at me as if he was undressing me with his eyes.

I guess my discomfort was apparent because Tai shook his head, sighed, and gave me a look.

"I'm not gonna fucking jump you or anything."

I felt my face heat up. "I didn't say that."

Tai rolled his eyes. "You don't need to, it's obvious you think it."

"Yeah, well..."

"Am I not allowed to look at you? Honestly, this is ridiculous."

"Tai, Matt!"

Tai let out a frustrated sigh and we turned to see Mimi coming our way. She smiled eagerly when she reached us and we put out little discussion on hold for a minute.

"Hey, you two," Mimi said cheerfully. "Matt, did Tai tell you about my party this Friday?"

I nodded. "Yeah."

"Well, are you coming?"

"Yeah," I said again. I hadn't asked my parents, but chances were they'd say yes.

"Great!" Mimi exclaimed. "Just wait, it's gonna be so much fun! You're coming too, right, Tai?"

"Of course," he said.

"Great! I'll see you two later!"

Mimi went off down the hall- to tell more people about the party, I guess.

"I'll pick you up," Tai said.

I blinked. "Huh?"

"On Saturday. You don't know where she lives, right? So I'll pick you up."

"Okay."

There was an awkward silence between us and Tai opened his mouth to speak, but then the bell rang.

"See you later, then," he said instead of whatever he'd been about to say.

I nodded. "Yeah... see you."

The first day of second semester went pretty well. There were quite a few familiar faces in my first class, to my relief. Mimi was there, and immediately waved me over. She was sitting with two girl friends and I sat beside one of them, a girl named Karen who remembered me as "Mimi's friend". Mimi and her other friend, Opal, sat in front of us. In my second class, I sat beside an empty desk but Hazel and her friend Kim sat in front of me so I at least vaguely knew someone in the class.

Akira showed up to Art class with dark green hair and a black shirt that said "Who are you and why aren't you dead?". Needless to say, the teachers didn't like that.

I'd just finished at my locker at the end of the day and was about to go find Tai or just wait for him when I was grabbed by my shirt and dragged down the hall. My stomach sank and struggled against the grip, but the person was too strong and they pulled me into the closest bathroom, slamming me against the wall inside. I found myself staring into the repulsive eyes that I hated so much.

"Hey there, Blondie," Kouji said in a snide tone, his eyes narrowed.

"Hello, Kouji," I said just as coolly, heart jumping at the fact that I had just talked back to the school bully.

I heard a crack and became aware that Kouji had punched me and it was my jaw that had made the cracking sound.

"Don't mess with me," he snarled. "And stay away from Tai, got it?"

I frowned, confused as to why he would say that.

"Why don't **you** try staying away from **me**?" I retorted. My mouth was really running away from me, but I realized that too late.

Kouji punched me again, this time harder, and then he kneed me in the stomach. I doubled over and he hit me again, making me stumble against the wall and then fall to the ground.

"You're dead, Ishida," Kouji growled, grabbing my head and banging it against the wall. Everything went black for a few seconds and I felt Kouji punch me several times in the stomach. I felt like I was about to cough up blood and thought I was going to pass out, but then Kouji was pulled off of me. I blinked a few times, trying to overcome my dizziness, and looked up to see Tai standing there. The bathroom door shut and I realized that Kouji had walked out.

"Shit," Tai muttered, dropping to his knees beside me. "Are you okay?"

I just looked at him for a moment, then slumped a bit, nearly falling over. Luckily Tai has quick reflexes and he caught me.

"Whoa," he said, wrapping an arm around me to support me. "I take that as a no."

My head felt heavy and I rested it on his shoulder. "I'm dizzy," I murmured, "and my jaw's kinda sore... and I can taste my own blood."

"Well, that's not good."

"No shit," I muttered.

Tai chuckled a bit and I looked at him, frowning and wondering what the hell was so funny. He shook his head, smiling.

"Honestly, you amaze me sometimes."

I wanted to ask him what he was talking about, but couldn't bring myself to speak. I've always heard people say that they've been locked in a gaze with someone and can't look away, but I never thought it was so true until that moment. I didn't know why, but I couldn't tear my eyes away from his.

Eventually Tai looked away, clearing his throat awkwardly. He ran a hand through his hair, then opened his mouth to speak. However, he stopped when I reached up and threaded my fingers through his hair, pulling his face down until it was a mere inch away from mine.

Tai was perfectly still, and I could swear he was holding his breath. I could hardly believe my own actions, but they weren't what I was concerned with most at the moment.

"Tai," I murmured barely audibly, "kiss me."

There was a moment of complete silence, then Tai let out a long, slow breath.

"Fuck," he whispered, "I..." He trailed off, eyes flickering to my lips.

I took the task upon myself, leaning in and closing the gap between us. Our lips had barely met when Tai pulled away quickly. I frowned up at him and he shook his head, looking torn.

"No. I-"

I didn't let him speak, moving in once again and pressing my lips to his more forcefully. This time he gave in, moving his hand to cup my face and letting his lips mesh with mine. I let my eyes flutter closed, feeling a tingling warmth spread through me. I pulled him closer, attempting to deepen the kiss, and he prodded my lips lightly with his tongue, at which point I opened my mouth to allow him access.

I began to feel lightheaded and at first I thought nothing of it, but then the rest of my body started to feel like lead. My hand fell from Tai's head and my lips separated from his, my head dropping back onto his shoulder. It felt like the world was spinning.

"Shit." Tai's voice sounded far away, and I could swear I'd opened my eyes but I still only saw black. "Matt? Are you okay?"

I managed only a soft grunt in reply and then, just seconds later, I suddenly felt like I was flying. At first it scared me, but then I realized that Tai was carrying me.

"I've gotta get you home," Tai muttered, and that was the last thing I heard before I blacked out.

**xXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx**


	6. Stolen Kisses and Broken Homes

DISCLAIMER: I don't own Digimon or rights to any of the characters, I am not making a profit from this, etc.

**Kukachi  
V: Stolen Kisses and Broken Homes  
**by: neo-chan

When I opened my eyes, everything seemed way too bright. I closed my eyes again, rubbing them briefly before trying again to open them, squinting slightly at the brightness of the room. My room, in fact.

"Hey."

I blinked and shifted my eyes to beside me, where the voice was coming from. It took me a moment to realize that I was laying on my bed and Tai was sitting beside me.

"You passed out," Tai said, "so I figured I'd take you home... Akira drove."

"How did you get in?" was the first thing I asked.

"I found your keys in your bag. I figured it would be easier to just take you straight here instead of bring you to my place and then get you back here later, y'know? So yeah..."

I rolled onto my stomach, propping myself up on my elbows and closing my eyes as a wave of dizziness hit me. My head was killing me.

"So... you feeling okay?"

"Not really," I said with a sigh. "God... he hit my head so fucking hard..."

"Yeah, I noticed."

Something about the way Tai spoke made something click in my mind and I began to feel sick as I remembered my actions. Holy shit... I'd practically forced Tai to kiss me. What the hell?

It had to have been the hit to my head that did it. It must have made me delirious or something, because there was no other reason for me to do what I did. I was **not** gay, and I didn't have a crush on Tai or anything stupid like that... although Tai probably thought that I did now. Crap.

"I'm not gay," I blurted out.

Tai looked at me like I was crazy. "What the... I never said you were."

"Yes you did. You said I was either homophobic or gay. And now I kissed you, and... fuck, I'm not gay!"

Tai held up his hands in defense. "Hey, I believe you. Don't yell at me."

"I'm not yelling, I just... I didn't mean to. Kiss you, I mean."

Something seemed to change in Tai's face, and I felt a pang of guilt. I didn't want him to think I liked him or anything, though, so what else was I supposed to say?

"Not that I... I mean..." I trailed off. There was really nothing I could say that sounded better unless it somehow implied that I did like him. And I didn't.

"Look, whatever," Tai muttered. He stood up. "I'm gonna go... I'll call you later."

I didn't know what to say or do, so I just nodded. "Bye."

I knew that I was probably being a little harsh, but... well, what else was I supposed to do?

**xXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx**

Later on, after I'd picked up Amaya and given her a snack, I thought about phoning Tai. I felt like I should apologize, but I didn't know exactly what I was apologizing for. It wasn't like I could apologize for not being gay.

It turned out I didn't have to call him because, true to his word, he called me. After exchanging hellos, the line went silent and I tried to think of something to say. Luckily, he spoke first.

"You know, it's okay if you didn't like it."

At first I didn't know what he was talking about. "What?"

"The kiss. It's okay if you, y'know... if you didn't like it. I can deal with that. But... fuck, you can't tell me it was a mistake."

"Well, it was," I said stubbornly.

"Fuck, Matt, **you **kissed **me**! You can't say it wasn't intentional!"

"I didn't know what I was doing!" I argued.

Tai snorted. "Oh, come on. You can't blame everything on your goddamn dizziness. Being dizzy doesn't make you fucking kiss someone."

"Well apparently it does because I'm not fucking gay!"

"What the hell is so wrong with being gay?" Tai exclaimed. "Fuck, you'd think it was a disease or something!"

"Well, if it is, I'm not catching it from you," I snapped, then hung up the phone.

I regretted it instantly and buried my face in my hands, groaning. Why was I such an idiot? I almost picked the phone right back up and called Tai to apologize, but figured that he probably wouldn't pick up if he knew it was me anyway.

...God, I was so stupid.

**xXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx**

I arrived at school the next day just before the bell rang, and Tai was still at his locker. I looked up and caught his eye, but he looked away. My heart sank a little and I turned the other way to find Kouji walking up to me. Surprisingly, I felt more annoyance than fear. First of all, he wouldn't randomly start beating me up in the hallway and secondly, I was too preoccupied thinking about Tai to bother with him.

"I'm surprised you dared to show your face at school today," Kouji said to me, sneering. "Do you need a reminder of why you should stay away, you little bitch?"

Kouji shoved me. Irritated, mostly because of mine and Tai's fight, I shoved him back kind of roughly. People were stopping to watch now and Kouji gaped at me for a moment before scowling.

"You'd better watch it, Blondie."

I rolled my eyes, ignoring the threat in his voice. "Whatever."

Shutting my locker, I picked up my bag and headed down the hall. Quite a few eyebrows raised at this and whispers erupted. I could hardly believe what I'd done, myself.

"You're not worth my fucking time anyway, faggot!" Kouji yelled after me. I ignored him and continued down the hallway, holding back a smile.

**xXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx**

When I entered my third period class, Tai and Akira were already there. I was about to find somewhere else to sit when Tai approached me.

He met my eyes. "Nice work this morning, telling Kouji off."

"Yeah," Akira added from his seat, which surprised me.

"It was easier than I thought it'd be," I responded, "and thanks." I looked at Akira and nodded so he knew the thank-you applied to him, too.

"Well, sit the fuck down," Akira said. I interpreted that as a display of respect, possibly an offer of friendship. So much for our supposed status of 'enemies'.

And so, the tension between Tai and I dissolved for the time being. I was beyond relieved; I didn't know what I would do if I was fighting with Tai for long. I didn't know why he'd forgiven me so easily, though.

"Nice outfit," Tai commented. I was wearing a pair of black jeans and a black shirt with a dark blue sweater. I'd barely touched my hair when I woke up.

I shrugged. "I'm sure you could come up with a better one for me."

"Nah," Akira spoke up. "Tai hasn't got the ability to put outfits together. It actually requires thought."

I grinned and Tai stuck his tongue out.

"Yagami!" The teacher's voice made us all jump, and we turned to see him enter the classroom. "That tongue had better help you participate in a discussion today."

"I elect Ishida's tongue to discuss for me!" Tai came back at him.

The teacher rolled his eyes and ignored Tai's reply, turning his attention away from us.

"You're gonna need more than my tongue," I said. "And I'm not in the mood to lend you my whole brain."

Akira snickered and Tai mock-glared at us. The bell rang and the last of the students began filing into class.

"I'll get you both back, just wait," Tai declared.

Akira snorted. "Yeah, I'm really scared."

Tai stuck out his tongue.

"Yagami!"

**xXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx**

The rest of the day went relatively well except that when I got home, my parents were both there with some news; they'd found a place for us to move to. The moving date would be Tuesday of the next week, since it was the earliest we were able to move in.

It was an apartment. The location of the building was close to my school, they told me, so that was one good thing. It was just about the only good thing, actually, except that I'd asked them if I could go to Mimi's party and they'd said yes.

I called Tai that evening and told him the news. I also gave him the address of my apartment so that he could pick me up on Friday. I learned another good thing about the apartment; it was close to Tai's. He even knew some people who lived there. Anyway, we got off-topic and somehow, Kouji got brought up. This made me remember a question I had for Tai.

"You never answered me when I asked if Kouji's picked on you before," I said. "Has he?"

Tai sighed. "Kouji and I... we go back a long way. We've known each other since we were kids. He... well..." He paused. "This can never get out, okay? Promise me that."

I was confused, but agreed since I was curious. "I promise."

"Okay. Kouji and I were friends, pretty good ones. We played soccer together a lot, and he'd come over to my house sometimes just to hang out. It was like that for years. Anyway, when we were thirteen he told me he liked me. I mean, **really** liked me."

I was shocked. Kouji was gay?

"Matt? You there?"

"Yeah, I'm here... um, so what happened? I mean, did you two...?"

"No. I told Kouji there was no way I'd ever have feelings for him. Actually, I believe the words were: 'Ew, get away from me, you fag'!" Tai let out a dry chuckle. "Back then, the thought of liking another boy was too 'gross' to consider. Kouji's not my type anyway."

"But didn't he get mad?"

"Oh, believe me, he was. But somehow, he managed to blame it on my friends and the people I hung around with. He thought that they were influencing me or something, or that I liked one of them instead and that's why I wouldn't date him. Supposedly he still likes me, and that's the reason he never picks fights with me. He'd probably pick a fight with Akira, but Akira's too tough. Kouji only targets people he thinks are weak."

Well, that made sense.

"Who else knows?" I asked. "About him liking you, I mean."

"No one."

It took a moment to process that. "...what?"

"Well, Akira knows, of course. But you can't tell anyone."

"I won't, but you mean..." I was surprised. "Why would you tell me about this if you've only ever told Akira?"

"I trust you," Tai answered simply.

"Oh." What could I say to that?

There was a brief silence and I spoke quickly, before I lost my nerve.

"I'm sorry."

"For what?" Tai asked.

"You know... what I said to you the other day. About... well..."

"Don't worry about it," Tai said, trying to dismiss the subject.

"Are you kidding?" I couldn't believe he was acting like I'd done nothing. "Tai, I was such an asshole to you!"

"Yeah, but I know you didn't mean it. I know it's hard to... whatever, just forget about it."

I wondered what he'd been about to say, but shrugged it off. If everything was okay between us, then whatever. I wasn't going to press the issue.

Thursday morning, I woke up with the feeling that something would go wrong. I didn't know how right I was.

Everything seemed to be going fine at first. When lunchtime rolled around, we didn't sit with a big busy table. Instead it was just Tai, Mimi, Hazel, Akira and I.

"I can't wait for the party!" Mimi exclaimed. "Matt, it'll be your first party here, right?"

I nodded. "Yeah."

"Awesome! You'll have so much fun, babe, I promise."

"We'll force you to," Tai added with a grin.

For some reason, my eyes went straight to his lips. Obviously this freaked me out and I began to argue with myself inwardly. I wasn't gay. So why was Tai bringing out such weird feelings in me? And why had I kissed him? It wasn't because I liked him, it couldn't be. I'd never felt any attraction whatsoever to a male before. But Tai was so... God, things were so messed up.

"I'll be right back," I said abruptly, standing up and walking away from the table. I headed straight out of the cafeteria and to the nearest washroom.

The nearest washroom from the exit I'd taken happened to be one that nobody ever went to for some reason; it was always kind of abandoned. But I needed a place to think in peace, so I thought nothing of it.

Until Kouji walked in, that was.

Unlike the previous time he'd approached me, I had absolutely no confidence in me... mostly because there was no one around and he could kill me right there and then if he really wanted. Crap.

Kouji half-smirked, half-snarled at me. "Well, seems like you haven't gotten enough, huh Blondie?"

"My name is Yamato," I replied, trying to play it off as if I wasn't scared. _Keep your cool, _I told myself. _If you act like you don't care, maybe he'll go away._

"Whatever." Kouji walked over to me and stood so that we were only inches apart. I forced myself not to back away and clenched my jaw, staring into his eyes determinedly.

My plan didn't work. In fact, I think it pissed Kouji off even more that I didn't seem scared. He hit me, hard, and I stumbled, clutching the bathroom counter for support. My jaw was throbbing from his punch and I could taste blood already. There was no way I was going to survive this.

Kouji grabbed my shirt and glared at me.

"You listen to me," he growled. "Stay away from Tai."

I really should've kept my mouth shut, because then maybe he would've ceased his attack. But of course, I was an idiot and spoke up.

"He doesn't like you, okay?" I blurted out. "Get over it!"

Kouji's eyes widened for a second and then he grabbed me, throwing me against the bathroom counter. I winced at the pain in my back, but that was the least of my worries when he placed his hands around my neck, making me cough and nearly choke. My head was spinning and I really and truly believed that I was going to die; that he was going to strangle me right then and there. However, he had other plans. He let go of my neck and instead banged my head against the bathroom mirror- which hurt a hell of a lot.

"I would fucking kill you," Kouji hissed with a venom in his voice I'd never heard before, "but then you wouldn't suffer nearly as much as I want you to."

I never could have expected what Kouji did next. He grabbed me by my hair and at first I thought he was going to hit my head again, but what came next was worse.

Kouji grabbed my shoulder and turned me around, then shoved me against the counter and reached around me, shoving my pants down and then taking my member into his hand. I went completely still, shocked, and he used his free hand to cover my mouth.

"I'll show you, you fucking faggot."

He scraped his nails down my length and I choked out a sob, which was muffled by the hand he was clamped over my mouth. He let out a snort and hit the back of my head with his fist, forcing my head forward. My head slammed into one of the taps on the counter and I nearly passed out from the impact. Darkness took me for a few seconds, then I managed to blink it away. I wished I actually had passed out, though, because Kouji had shoved his pants down and he pressed against me, his cock nudging between my cheeks.

I felt streams of tears running down my face and realized that I was crying openly. Kouji was right; it probably would have been better for him to kill me. I was more scared than I'd ever been in my life, and my sobs shook my whole body as he began to position himself at my entrance. There was nothing I could do. He was really going to rape me.

It took me a moment to realize that the feeling of his skin on mine had disappeared. When it clicked, however, my eyes snapped open and I quickly turned when I heard a loud crack, like a fist connecting with bone. My eyes were blurred with tears and blood, and I was so dizzy that I fell to the floor, unable to hold myself up.

I felt someone's hands on me and automatically tensed, but quickly realized that they weren't Kouji's. Whoever it was pulled my pants up for me and fastened them, then I felt the blood being wiped from my face with a paper towel. I blinked a few times until my vision was somewhat clear, and couldn't believe what I saw.

"Akira?" I croaked.

He didn't answer, just handed me a bunch of wet paper towels and placed my hand to my forehead. I held the bundle of paper towels there obediently and my eyes drifted to behind him where Kouji lay on the floor, unconscious. My eyes widened. Akira had knocked him out... for me?

Akira hauled me up off of the floor and I leaned against him heavily as we exited the bathroom, barely managing to stay conscious. Darkness blurred my vision every few seconds, and I wanted to just drop to the floor right there and sleep. I didn't have the strength to stay awake.

I didn't even notice people's reactions as we entered the cafeteria. I didn't have much time to anyway; immediately, I was taken into someone else's arms and then we exited the cafeteria again. I faintly registered Tai's voice, but I had no idea what he was saying or where we were going because everything was going black...

**xXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx**

When I came to, I knew I was in a car before I even opened my eyes. Someone's arm was around me and I opened my eyes to realize that it was Tai. My gaze drifted to the driver's seat and I saw Akira. The first thing that I thought of was to thank him, but all that came out when I opened my mouth was something similar to a groan.

Tai jumped a bit, looking at me in surprise. Apparently he hadn't noticed I'd woken up.

"Matt!" He put his other arm around me, hugging me, and I let out a little whimper as he pressed against my bruises. Quickly, he pulled away, realizing that he was hurting me.

"Sorry. Fuck, I thought you had a concussion or something..." He shook his head and I saw anger flash through his eyes. "I swear to God, I'm gonna fucking kill that-"

"We're here," Akira announced, and I looked out the window to find that we were outside of my house.

"Thanks, man," Tai said to Akira. He clapped him on the shoulder, then got out of the car and held his hand out to me.

I wanted to say thank-you too, however, and I turned to Akira.

"Thanks."

It took Akira a moment to realize I was talking to him but when he did, he just nodded.

"No, really," I insisted, feeling it necessary to let him know just how grateful I really was. "If you hadn't come, I'd be... well..."

"I heard Kouji talking earlier about his plan to do that," Akira spoke up. "I figured he'd take the opportunity then, and I'd be no better than him if I didn't try to intervene."

I wanted to say thank-you again, but Tai pulled me out of the car then and waved goodbye to Akira, who instantly sped off. I made a mental note to try and express to Akira how grateful I really was the next time I saw him.

Tai practically carried me to my door, taking my keys from my bag again and letting us in. He took me up to my room and laid me down on the bed, then sat down beside me.

"Are you okay?" he asked, then shook his head and took it back. "Fuck, what am I saying... of course you're not okay. Shit... I can't believe he fucking... I'm honestly going to kill him. I am."

"I wanna take a shower," I mumbled, still barely conscious. I felt unbelievable dirty after being beaten and nearly raped in the school bathroom.

"Can you even stand up?" Tai asked me.

Never mind standing up, I could barely sit up. I tried to and realized that my limbs felt much too heavy to lift. I let out a dry laugh.

"No."

"Do you want me to... you know... help?"

I took me a moment to realize what he was offering. When I did, however, I nodded immediately. I didn't care that Tai would see me naked, I didn't care that he was gay... I just really, really wanted a shower.

"Okay."

The whole situation went rather smoothly and quickly. Tai carried me to the bathroom, undressed me, pretty much washed me, cleaned and bandaged my wounds, and then helped me get dressed. It occurred to me that I probably should have felt more uncomfortable, but I was so out of it that I really couldn't bring myself to think about anything other than the fact that I wanted to feel clean.

Once I was laying back on my bed, dressed, Tai attempted to get the full story out of me.

"So what exactly happened?" he asked me. "I mean... I know you probably don't want to talk about it, but it might help or something... you know? To get it all out?"

I looked at Tai, just looked at him, for a long moment. Then I opened my mouth and the story began to flow out. It was almost like I was detached from my body; I didn't feel like I was telling the story, but it was coming out of my mouth. My voice sounded distant to my own ears and I was aware that I sounded void of almost any emotion. It was probably better that way, though... I didn't want Tai to see me bawling my eyes out or anything.

I could tell that Tai was trying to restrain his anger as I told the story. He really did look like he wanted to murder Kouji. I couldn't help but think that if he actually **did** murder Kouji, I wouldn't protest. At least, that was how I felt at that moment.

Shortly after telling Tai exactly what had happened that afternoon, I went to sleep. I needed to rest and, besides, I still felt like I was barely there physically. When I woke up, Tai was still there beside me and after I reassured him that I would be fine, he left for his house and told me he'd call me. I doubted that I'd answer the phone if he did, though... I still felt completely drained.

Sometime later that evening, I realized that we'd missed out on Mimi's party. This triggered something inside of me and that was when I buried my face in my pillow and began to cry.

**xXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx**

When my parents got home and came up to my room, I lied and said that I'd tripped down the stairs. Luckily they didn't question me, probably because I'd never been in the habit of lying before. They allowed me to spend the rest of the day just laying in bed, coming in periodically to check on me but making sure they didn't interrupt my rest.

Most of the weekend was spent packing our things for the move, and Monday came too quickly. I'd barely slept at all on the weekend and I'd talked to Tai a few times, but I'd mostly been recovering from what Kouji had done to me. I woke up late on Monday and threw on the first clothes I found, then got into the car with my father, not bothering to stop to eat breakfast or anything. My mother seemed upset about this, but that was the last thing on my mind. When I got to school, Tai was waiting for me at my locker.

He looked at me and raised an eyebrow.

"Didn't get any sleep?"

"How can you tell?" I asked sarcastically, then stifled a yawn and opened my locker.

I noticed a few people staring as they passed by. I tried by best to ignore them, but was forced to think about what had happened Friday when Mimi arrived, took one look at me, and said: "What happened to **you**?"

"Kouji," Tai answered for me, and I caught the undertone of anger in his voice. "Kouji being the fucking bastard that he is."

Mimi looked at me, then directed a question at Tai. "Does this have something to do with you and Akira beating Kouji up instead of you all coming to my party?"

"What?" I turned to Tai questioningly.

"Akira and I hunted Kouji down and beat the crap out of him after I left your house on Friday," Tai explained.

"They got him pretty bad," Mimi added. "What did he do to deserve that? I know he's an asshole, but...?"

"Believe me, he deserved it," Tai said with a frown. "He definitely deserved it."

"Who deserved what?" Akira asked, coming up behind us.

"Kouji," Tai answered simply.

"Sure as hell he did," Akira said, catching on and looking at me. He shook his head. "Man, those are some serious bruises."

I still wanted to thank Akira again, but not in front of Tai and Mimi. Luckily the opportune moment came a few minutes later.

"I think my history textbook is in your locker," Tai said to Mimi. He turned to me and Akira. "Be right back, you guys."

They went off to Mimi's locker, leaving Akira and I alone at mine. Akira didn't say anything. I finished getting my stuff together and turned to face him.

"Thanks," I said.

Akira nodded casually, like it was no big deal. It really was a big deal, though.

"I'm serious. I don't even know if I'd be alive right now if it wasn't for you."

He shrugged, shoving his hands in his pocket and kicking at a piece of paper on the floor. I'd sensed before that he didn't like discussing emotions and such things so openly, so I dropped the subject and soon, Tai and Mimi were back and the atmosphere was normal again. I was glad I'd gotten to thank him again, though.

I received comments all day about my condition. After school I went to Tai's place because I really didn't feel like going home just yet. Kari was in awe at how beat-up I looked but didn't ask too many questions because Tai was so tense about the subject.

Since Tuesday was moving day, I didn't go to school. Moving wasn't much fun, especially since half of our stuff couldn't even fit in the place. My new room was much smaller. Once I was done arranging my furniture in the room, it had a cramped look to it. That was the case with all of the rooms; we couldn't fit everything in no matter how hard we tried. When you move, you realize how much junk you have that you really don't need.

Tai called me that evening to ask about my new place and to tell me that we could walk to school together from then on since my apartment was close to his. That was a good thing because my dad had told me that he wanted to go in to work earlier anyway and so it would be good if I could walk both to and from school.

On Wednesday Mimi announced that she was going to have yet another party, on that Friday. This time she had a legit excuse; it was Valentine's Day. I agreed to go and made a mental note to ask my parents later. I also saw Kouji in the hall that day, but he didn't so much as look at me. I figured that Akira and Tai had succeeded in teaching him a lesson.

That night I asked if I could go to Mimi's party and the answer was yes. I then went to my room to finish unpacking my things. Everything seemed fine until I heard raised voices from my parents' bedroom.

I stepped into the hallway and saw their door half-closed. I could hear them arguing, and peeked into Amaya's room to see if she was awake. She was taking a nap, but if things escalated I knew she would wake up.

Though the door was partially closed, I could still see what was generally happening. I tried to tell myself that I shouldn't be watching, that I was eavesdropping and it was wrong, but I couldn't move. I watched from the hallway as my parents began to full-out yell at each other. I felt shivers creeping down my spine and my head started to ache. What was my life coming to?

Amaya had woken up and she came into the hallway, starting to cry at the sight of my parents fighting. I absentmindedly bent down and put my arms around her in consolation, but didn't say a word. I didn't know what to say. I couldn't try to comfort her when I had the feeling that things wouldn't be okay.

My parents seemed to forget that Amaya and I were even at home as they screamed at each other. It didn't seem to faze them and it was almost as if it were a regular occurrence to them. I had to wonder if this had happened before; if their relationship had been in danger and they'd been hiding it from me. It definitely seemed that way.

Suddenly it went silent. My heart skipped a beat, stomach clenching nervously. My father looked remorseful, but didn't say another word. Neither did my mother. She began moving around the room and collecting items. My father didn't budge from his spot, looking helpless.

My mother exited the room with a box under one arm. She took Amaya out of my arms and looked at me for a moment, then shook her head.

"I'm sorry."

Then she headed for the door. A moment later, it slammed shut behind her.

The apartment was deadly silent. My hands were trembling. What had just happened?

My father let out a deep sigh. "Yamato..." he trailed off, looking helpless.

I raced to my room and locked myself inside, tears flowing down my face as I laid on my bed. I found it so hard to believe that at such a hard time, our family couldn't stick together. If my parents had been having trouble, why had they hidden it from me? Didn't they know it was worse to hide problems like that?

My dad knocked on my door but I didn't answer. I don't think he really expected me to. My mother had just pretty much walked out on us; I had the right to not want to speak to anyone.

I didn't feel like answering when the phone rang, so I let it ring until the answering machine picked up. The phone started ringing again a few seconds later, though, so I reluctantly picked it up.

"Hello?" I knew I sounded miserable, and the person on the other end immediately picked up on this.

"What's wrong?"

It was Tai. I sighed, feeling tears come to my eyes again. "Things just keep getting worse."

"How?" Tai suddenly sounded concerned. "What happened? Are you okay?"

"Not really." I rubbed my eyes and sighed again, shakily. "I think my parents just split up."

"What?" I could picture Tai's shocked face. "Why? How?"

"I don't know. They just started talking about something and then they were arguing and..." I wiped away a tear. "I just... I really don't know."

"Shit, things just aren't going your way lately..."

"I know. Fuck, it's so messed up... my mom just walked out, and she took Amaya with her... I don't know if she's coming back."

"Are you serious? Shit... I think you need some live support. Do you want me to come over there, or meet up or something?"

"Yeah... where?"

"There's this exit from a stairwell in the back your building. I'll meet you there. It won't take me long, okay?"

"Okay."

"So you'll be there?"

"Yeah."

"I'll be there as soon as I can. Bye."

**xXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx**

I didn't bother to ask my dad if I could leave; I just yelled that I was going for a walk as I walked out the door. He didn't try to stop me. He didn't even respond.

Tai arrived very quickly. He must've walked really fast. We both sat down on the stairs and were silent for a long few moments until I rested my head in my hands and let out a long, drawn-out sigh.

"I can't believe this," I murmured, almost to myself. Tears were welling up in my eyes again and I blinked them back.

Tai put a hand on my back, rubbing soothingly. He didn't say a word, and I found myself replaying what had happened in my head. Without warning, I began to cry, sobbing quietly. Tai wrapped his arms around me instantly, patting my back and letting me cry into his shirt. I felt weak and pathetic and tried to gather myself, moving away from Tai and wiping my hands over my eyes. I forced the tears back and took a few deep breaths, then shook my head.

"God," I muttered, "I'm acting like such a wimp."

"No you're not," Tai said. "You have a reason to be upset about this. I mean... shit, you've had so much crap going on in your life lately... you've gotta let out all the frustration somehow."

"Yeah, well... thanks. For, y'know..." I met Tai's eyes. "...being here for me."

"That's what friends are for," Tai replied, smiling softly.

I just sat there, staring into Tai's eyes, for a long few seconds before I slowly leaned in and met Tai's lips with mine. I didn't know why, but it just felt right at that moment. After I realized what I doing, though, I quickly pulled away and turned my gaze towards the floor, feeling my face heat up.

There was an awkward silence that seemed to last forever. I didn't know what to say. I didn't even know what to **think**! I couldn't explain my own actions because I had no idea what I was doing and why I was doing it!

"If you want, we can forget that happened."

I blinked at Tai's voice, then looked at him in surprise. "...what?"

"You're stressed out right now," Tai said. "Being stressed can make people do some crazy things. So... if you want, we can just..." he trailed off, shrugging.

I was relieved and greatly appreciated what he was doing. Nodding, I offered him a smile.

"Thanks."

"Like I said, what are friends for?"

It could have been my imagination, but I thought I caught an undercurrent of bitterness in his voice. I disregarded it, though, and Tai stood up, brushing his pants off.

"So... you okay now? I mean... are you feeling a bit better?"

I nodded, standing up also. "Yeah... thanks."

"No problem." Tai gave me a little pat on the shoulder. "See you later."

"Bye."

I watched him walk away, then headed up the stairs to my floor. It was true that Tai's visit had relieved some of my frustration towards the newest change in my life, but it was also brought about a new subject of frustration: my actions towards Tai. I was starting to feel a little uneasy about the whole thing; there had to be **some** reason behind my actions, and Tai's words kept ringing in my ears: _"Either you're homophobic or you're not comfortable with your sexuality."_

But I couldn't be gay. At the very most, I could admit that I might be slightly attracted to Tai... but that didn't mean anything. I was still straight. It wasn't like I lusted for him or anything.

Why did things have to be so complicated?

**xXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx**

On Thursday after school, I went to Tai's place because I didn't feel like going home so soon. I stayed there for a couple of hours and as I was walking away from the building, I heard a noise from above me and looked up.

A moment later, I was sprawled on the ground. I groaned and rubbed my head, then looked to see what had fallen on me.

A young boy was grinning sheepishly at me. I stared at him in disbelief, suspecting that a very interesting story was about to be told.

"Sorry," he apologized. "I was trying to get in through my friend's window. He lives here. I guess I misjudged."

I continued to stare. "...why wouldn't you just use the door?"

"Because he's grounded."

"...right." I got up and helped the other boy up, shaking my head.

"I'm Daisuke," he introduced himself.

"I'm Yamato. Maybe you should just give up on the window thing."

Daisuke shrugged. "Should. Could. Probably won't."

I laughed. "Well, good luck."

"Thanks."

When I got home, I was greeted by an unpleasant sight: half of the things in the apartment were gone. I went into the kitchen and found a note. The main point of it was that my mother had come and gotten all of her things, and she wouldn't be coming back. The note also revealed what I'd suspected; that my parents had been having problems for a long time... especially since our financial situation had changed. They'd hidden it well up until that night, which had been the last straw. Surprisingly, my dad had custody of me. My mother wasn't too happy about this but technically my dad had the financial means to support me while my mother didn't, so there wasn't much she could do about it. I'm closer to my dad than my mom anyway, so I was glad that he had custody of me.

Also, it turned out that Amaya's parents-my mom's brother and his wife-had given my mother custody of Amaya because they were having financial difficulties too(although much worse than ours) and found themselves in a situation where they didn't feel they could give Amaya a suitable lifestyle. I didn't understand why that had been hidden from me, and I had to wonder what other secrets my parents might be keeping from me- especially if they were as big as the ones that had already been revealed.

"It's Valentine's Day!" Tai greeted me when we met up to walk to school on Friday.

Right, Valentine's Day. How ironic that my parents had split up two days before the romantic holiday.

"Are you still up for the party tonight?" Tai asked me as we walked.

The party at Mimi's. I'd forgotten all about it.

"I guess. It should help take my mind off stuff, right?"

"Yeah. Besides, it won't be as much fun if you're not there."

I rolled my eyes. "You've never been to a party with me. How do you know I'm fun?"

"Because, believe me, it's hard **not** to have fun at Mimi's parties."

Her parties sounded legendary. I was curious, but at the same time I really didn't feel like going anywhere.

There was a lot of excitement at lunch about Mimi's party, which made it even harder for me to back out so I gave up and accepted the fact that I'd be going to the party whether I felt like it or not.

"Everyone is gonna be there," Tai told me on the way home. "Mimi's parties are always crazy."

Akira nodded in agreement. He and Tai walked home from school together all the time and now I'd joined them because of my new location.

"Everyone?" I asked, starting to feel a bit anxious.

"Yup. Everyone."

I tried to look excited or at least neutral, but hearing that made me dread going to the party even more. Going to a huge social event where I wouldn't really know anyone but Tai, Akira, and Mimi didn't exactly sound like fun to me.

"We can introduce you to everyone!" Tai exclaimed, and he really did sound excited. "You already know a few of them. This is gonna be awesome, don't you think?"

I forced a smile. "Yeah. Awesome."

**xXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx**

I stood in front of my closet for a long time that evening, wondering if an outfit would just jump out at me. Unfortunately none did, so I called Tai.

"I don't know what to wear," I complained to him when he picked up the phone.

"What, for the party? Anything!"

"Yeah, but... any suggestions?"

"It's not a big deal."

"Tai, I've never been to a party around here before. Yes, it's a big deal."

"Stop being paranoid. You'll look fine no matter what. Better than fine."

"So you're not gonna help me, then."

"Nope. I'll pick you up at six. See ya."

He hung up, leaving me to fret over what to wear. I groaned aloud and stared into my closet. Then I got an idea and brightened up, grabbing the phone again and starting to dial Mimi's number. However, I stopped halfway through. I couldn't bother Mimi; she was probably busy setting up for the party.

I put the phone down again and sighed heavily, plopping down on my bed. _This had better be worth it._

**xXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx**

I was studying myself in the mirror when Tai arrived. I abandoned the bathroom and made my way quickly to the front door.

"Hey," Tai said when I opened the door.

"Hey." I fought back the urge to run and look in the mirror again.

Tai took a look at my outfit and grinned. "I told you you'd find something."

"Do I look okay?" I asked skeptically.

Tai raised an eyebrow. "**Okay**? If I was some random person at that party and I saw you dressed in that, I'd want to grab you and take you home with me."

I felt my face heat up and tried to ignore Tai's comment. He was just exaggerating.

"Akira's downstairs," Tai told me. "He's gonna drive us there. I'll probably end up driving us all back home."

"Why?" I asked as I stepped out and locked the door.

"You know. Drinking."

I looked at Tai. "...drinking?"

"You don't drink?"

"No."

"Don't worry, neither do I." We started down the hall. "That's why I'll be driving, obviously."

"I didn't even know you could drive."

"Yeah, I just don't have a car yet. My dad lets me borrow ours sometimes when he's not using it, though. Do you know how to drive?"

"No. I mean, my dad took me out in his car once or twice but that doesn't really count."

"I should teach you." Tai grinned at me. We'd reached the elevators and he pushed the button.

I gave him a skeptical look and he shoved me lightly.

"Hey! Don't you have any faith in me?"

I laughed. "It's not that, it's just that I'd rather learn from someone more... experienced. And less likely to get me into an accident."

Tai faked a hurt look. "I'm shocked you'd think that of me!"

The elevator came and we stepped in. There was no one else inside and a few seconds after the doors closed, Tai suddenly started snickering. I looked at him in confusion.

"What?" I asked, raising an eyebrow.

"One day when we get in the elevator and there's someone else in here, we should just randomly start pretending to make out."

I stared at him. "...what?"

"It would be hilarious! I can just imagine the looks we'd get..."

I shook my head and rolled my eyes at him, but inwardly I felt a little uncomfortable at even the mention of such an idea. For some reason, the thought of making out with Tai wasn't exactly repulsive.

The elevator doors opened and we began to walk out to Akira's car. Tai stopped suddenly, though, and turned to face me, causing me to stop walking also. I opened my mouth to question him, but he spoke first.

"By the way," he said, "Happy Valentine's Day."

He met my eyes as he said it and I stared at him for a long moment before something stirred inside of me and that uncomfortable feeling surfaced again. Why did I feel like kissing him again?

A horn honked outside and the moment shattered, Tai rolling his eyes and then turning to head out of the building. I followed behind him after a moment, telling myself that it was a good thing Akira had honked. Otherwise, who knew what I might have done?

Akira nodded at me when I got in the car. I half-nodded, half-smiled back. It was a big change from when I'd first met him and I was glad he finally accepted me.

When we pulled up to Mimi's house, I was slightly surprised. It was a pretty huge house. I don't know why, but I hadn't expected that- probably because everyone else I'd met so far lived in an apartment or a townhouse.

"Hi, guys!" Mimi answered the door brightly when we rang. "Come in! There's not much left to do."

There really wasn't. Her house looked like a party lounge and was decorated extravagantly. Hazel was already there because she'd been helping Mimi set up, and the rest of us helped them to finish up everything else that needed to be done, then waited for people to arrive.

We were all sitting, talking, and snacking when the doorbell rang. Mimi went to answer it. My nerves from earlier returned with a vengeance. Tai, Akira, and Hazel were still talking but I was too busy worrying. What had I been thinking? There was no way I'd last the night around so many strangers.

"Chris and Bryce are here!" Mimi announced, walking back into the room with two guys. She turned to me.

"Matt, this is Chris Masaki and Bryce Archilla. Guys, this is Yamato Ishida."

Chris grinned at me a held up a hand. "Hey!"

I realized he wanted me to high-five him and did so. "Hey."

Bryce just gave me a nod, then butted into the conversation the others were having. Soon Chris joined it too. Relief washed over me at how smoothly it had gone. Maybe I **was** just being paranoid.

Soon the introductions became more like "Adrien, everyone. Everyone, Adrien." and as more people arrived, the introductions stopped altogether. I felt a bit better knowing that I wasn't the only one who didn't know everybody else.

Not long after the party had really started, I spotted the boy I'd met the previous day. What was his name? Daisuke? He noticed me a second after I'd noticed him and grinned, making his way through the crowd.

"Hey!" he greeted me. "Man, what a coincidence! You know Mimi?"

I nodded. "Yeah."

"From school?"

"Yeah. How do **you** know her?"

Daisuke waved his hand. "Long story. Oh, let me introduce you to my stunning boyfriend!" Daisuke looked around. "...hm, where'd he go?"

I tried not to look surprised. I was, though, mostly because he was so open about his sexuality. It was kind of good that he was so up-front with it, but it was also a bit awkward. For me, at least; Daisuke didn't seem to find anything wrong with the fact that he'd mentioned that he was gay just as casually as you'd say "My name is John." He was still looking around- for his boyfriend, I assume.

"Is this the same guy you were climbing the tree for?" I asked.

"Yup."

"Isn't he grounded?"

"He snuck out... oh, there he is." Daisuke waved his arms in the air. "Hey, over here, babe!"

I could see the redness on the other boy's face as he came over to us. He glared at Daisuke when he reached us.

"Why do I put up with you?"

"Because you love me," Daisuke said with a grin. "Anyway, this is Yamato. Yamato, meet my boyfriend Takeru."

Takeru. Why did that sound familiar?

I smiled at the younger boy. "Hi."

"Hi." He was looking at me the same way I was looking at him: trying to find an answer.

He had blonde hair and blue eyes that looked just like mine, which kind of creeped me out. The look on his face even reminded me of myself. But that was crazy, right?

"Hey!" Tai appeared, slinging an arm around my shoulders. He looked at Takeru, then raised an eyebrow at Daisuke. "Who's this?" he asked in a suggestive tone.

"You guys know each other?" I asked in surprise.

Tai nodded. "Yeah. How do **you** know each other?"

"We bumped into each other yesterday," Daisuke said. "Literally. And **this** is Takeru, my super-sexy boyfriend."

"Daisuke!" Takeru gave Daisuke a murderous look.

Tai laughed. "I'm Tai." He tilted his head, giving Takeru a long look. "You know, you look sort of like-"

"Having fun?"

We turned to find Mimi beaming at us. She was glowing with party spirit.

"You bet!" Tai assured her.

"Good!" Mimi bounced off to another group.

Daisuke looked between Tai and I and raised his own eyebrow at us. "Are you two..?"

"No," I said quickly. "We're just friends."

Daisuke glanced at Tai for confirmation and Tai nodded.

"He's straight."

There was something in Tai's voice that I couldn't quite place, but it sounded a lot like disappointment. It made me feel a bit guilty, but I knew I shouldn't be- after all, it wasn't my fault; I just didn't like guys and that was how it was.

...even if I **did** kind of wonder what it would be like if we weren't just friends.

**xXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx**


	7. Changing Pace

DISCLAIMER: I don't own Digimon or rights to any of the characters; I am not making a profit from this, etc.

**Kukachi  
VI: Changing Pace  
**by: neo-chan

I didn't remember taking even one sip of anything that had alcohol in it, but apparently I had. I woke up in Tai's bed the next morning, not remembering any of the previous night. He was still asleep, with one arm wrapped around me, and the first thing I did was check to make sure that we had clothing on. The second thing I did was realize that I was going to throw up.

I moved Tai's arm from around me and got up, bolting out of the room and to the bathroom. I had just enough time to close the door and lean over the toilet before it started coming up. This just confirmed that I had drunk the previous night. An awful lot, too.

Once I'd finished throwing up, I brushed my teeth and splashed some water on my face. It made me feel a bit better. I was tired, though, and felt sluggish. I was ready to just go back to bed and not say a word to Tai about how I felt, but my plan didn't exactly work out. When I got back to Tai's room, he was awake.

"Feeling okay?" he asked with a raised eyebrow.

I sat down on the bed beside him, cross-legged. "What exactly happened last night?"

"You drank," Tai answered simply.

"I never drink," I said in disbelief. "I mean, I might've drank a bit once or twice at a few parties in Rihtona but I've never..." I shook my head.

"Well, congratulations then." Tai grinned. "You're a lot of fun when you're drunk. You made friends with a bunch of people."

"I did?"

"I had to practically drag you away!" Tai laughed. "It was an interesting drive home."

"Where's Akira?" I asked.

"He left before us. Someone gave him a ride. He drank a lot too, but he can hold his liquor pretty well. You've got to have a pretty big supply of alcohol to get him drunk."

"Did I do anything stupid?" I asked warily. I'd heard of some extremely stupid things people do and say when they're drunk. I really hoped I wasn't one of those people.

"Not really. Half of the people there were getting drunk themselves anyway. Everyone had fun. If people come up to you on Monday and say hi, just say hi back. They were probably at the party." Tai looked at me for a second, still grinning. "You really don't remember anything?"

I frowned slightly and tried to recall something, anything, from the party. Little fragments came to me, but nothing specific. I shrugged.

"Maybe I'll remember later?"

"Doubt it. So anyway, back to my initial question. How are you feeling?"

"Hung over," I said, then laughed a bit. "I never thought I'd be saying that."

"You only live once. You've got to have fun while you can. By the way, TK-Takeru-and Daisuke are sleeping in the living room. They drank too. Not as much as you, but obviously they don't want their parents finding out. I mean, they're fourteen. That wouldn't be pretty."

"No... wait, what about **your** parents?" Something dawned on me. "Oh no. Do they hate me now?"

Tai rolled his eyes. "Don't worry. They were asleep when we got home. And TK and Dai were definitely still asleep when my dad left for work. So they have no way of knowing that any of us drank."

"Did you drink?"

"A bit. Not enough to make any real difference. Anyway, I'll just tell them that it was really late and those two didn't want to go home and wake their parents up- which is true."

Everything seemed like it would be fine. Good. I relaxed and lay down again.

"Rise and shine!"

Kari skipped into the room and jumped on the bed, making it bounce. Another body followed a moment later. It was Daisuke. TK came into the room, too, but hung back at the doorway.

Tai rolled his eyes. "I see you guys are awake."

"Yup!" Daisuke said. "Your mom went out for coffee with her friend, by the way."

"She asked about Daisuke and TK," Kari added.

"What did you say?" Tai asked.

"I told her you came back late from the party and were giving them a drive and decided it would be easier if they slept over."

Tai shrugged and nodded. "Good enough."

"Do you guys know each other?" I asked Kari and Daisuke, since they seemed almost like siblings themselves.

Kari nodded. "I've known Dai and TK for awhile. We all went to school together until this year. But these bums didn't even tell me they were going out until last night!" Kari shot Daisuke and TK a look.

"We thought you knew!" was Daisuke's excuse.

Kari rolled her eyes.

"You know," Tai said to TK, "you don't have to be so quiet. You kind of remind me of Matt here when I first met him. Actually," he added, tilting his head, "you two look alike, too. You've got the same eyes."

TK and I looked at each other at the same time. I'd noticed the previous night but now that Tai mentioned it, I couldn't ignore it. I felt like I was looking at a different version of myself.

"Yeah, they do look alike," Daisuke agreed and Kari nodded. "Weird. You sure you two aren't long-lost brothers or something?"

Daisuke was just joking but something in my mind was trying to tell me something. I had a strange feeling about the whole thing and when I got home, I was definitely going to have a talk with my dad... just to make sure.

TK laughed at Daisuke's comment. "I'm pretty sure we aren't. Unless Yamato knows something I don't?" TK raised a teasing eyebrow.

I forced myself to laugh also. But the nagging in my head wouldn't go away.

**xXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx**

When I got home, I found my dad in the kitchen trying to prepare food... and not exactly succeeding. Let's just say my dad doesn't belong in the kitchen.

I lingered near the entrance. "Dad, I need to ask you something."

"Go ahead." He didn't even turn around.

"It's sort of... important. I mean, if it's true." It was really hard to word what I wanted to say. "Okay. Um... does the name Takeru ring a bell?"

He froze. He literally stopped everything he was doing and just stood there- which was my first clue that something was going on. When he'd snapped out of his stupor, he slowly turned to face me.

"What did you just say?"

"Takeru," I repeated. "Who is he?"

"He..." My dad stared at me for a long few seconds, then he shook his head and gave a small, disbelieving laugh. "...he's your brother."

"My **what**?" I stared. It was one thing to suspect it, but it was another thing to hear my suspicions confirmed.

My dad sighed. "He's your brother. This is a complicated story, so I'd sit down if I were you."

I sat down obediently, then watched and waited for him to continue.

"When you were very young, your mother and I split up for a period of time. Shortly after your mother and I separated, she called me to let me know that she was pregnant and seeing another man named Daron. She assumed that the baby was his and Daron got custody of it when it was born. It turns out that the baby was actually mine. Daron refused to admit it, though, and ran off with Takeru. Eventually he came to his senses, but by that time it had been several years and it wouldn't have been right for us to take Takeru back when he'd already been raised by Daron and his wife. And... well, that's where Takeru came from." My father shrugged helplessly. "The last time I saw Takeru was many, many years ago." He frowned slightly. "How did you...?"

"Dad... Takeru lives in Tai's building. He knows some of my friends, and I met him last night at a party."

My dad looked shocked. I didn't blame him; it was a stunning coincidence. I wondered how TK would take it.

**xXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx**

TK blinked at me.

"...what?"

"We're brothers," I told him for the third time. "Not even half-brothers or step-brothers or something, but full brothers. As in, we both have the same mother and father."

TK stared, then shook his head. "Yeah right. Nice try, but I'm not that gullible."

"I'm serious," I insisted. "You can even ask your parents if you want."

"Mom!"

I'd gone over to TK's place once my dad had come out of shock. Catherine, Daron's wife, had answered the door and told me that TK was grounded for a month; the sentence had been extended because of TK going to Mimi's party without permission. When I told her it was really important and mentioned my mother's name, however, she instantly let me in. TK was surprised to see me, of course, since we'd only just met the night before- which was also why he didn't believe me; he barely knew who the hell I was.

Catherine walked into the living room. She had blonde hair and blue eyes herself, which explained why TK had believed that he was her son.

"Yes, honey?"

"Mom, is this my brother?" TK asked outright.

Catherine went speechless. She stood there in stunned silence for a few moments, then cleared her throat nervously and began playing with her hair.

"I... well, you see... oh dear..."

"Are you kidding?" TK still looked skeptical.

"Honey, I was going to tell you when you were older-"

"Older? Mom, I'm fourteen! When were you planning on telling me? When I turned **thirty**?" TK shook his head. "No. I don't believe it. Unless you can prove it, I'm an only child and this is just some weird prank."

**xXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx**

The whole thing got pretty complicated, which I'd been expecting. You can't just walk into someone's life and suddenly become their family. My dad ended up coming to TK's place once Daron got home and the three adults repeatedly explained the scenario to TK. He insisted on getting a blood test done; a DNA test to prove that he really was my father's son. He refused to believe anything we were saying until he got the results.

After all of the drama, I visited Tai since I was already in the building while my dad stayed at TK's place to talk to Catherine and Daron. TK had decided to accompany me in visiting Tai since he didn't feel like sticking around and listening to the adults talk. I think his parents completely forgot about his grounding sentence because of all the things going on, so he managed to leave the house without them even saying a word.

Tai was pleasantly surprised to see us at the door. So was Daisuke, who hadn't left yet. He and TK went out somewhere and Kari ended up tagging along with them, so it was just Tai and I left at his place. I was only there for a few minutes before we decided to go for a walk.

"So what brought you and TK back here so soon?" Tai asked as we walked down the street. "And together? I didn't think you knew him."

"I don't. Well, now I do because of last night but..." I shook my head. "It's a long story."

It took me a while to tell the story and by the time I finished, we were almost back at Tai's place. Tai was surprised at the story, needless to say.

"Whoa. That's so random."

"I know. So many crazy things have been happening lately... I don't think I've ever had so much drama in my life before."

"Well, at least you can't say you have got a boring life."

I laughed. Tai and I got onto another topic from there and before I knew it, we were in Tai's lobby.

"You going to go up and see if your dad's still there?" Tai asked me.

I nodded and he pressed the button for the elevator. An older woman was waiting with us for the elevator, and I noticed her eyeing Tai and I suspiciously. I didn't know why, though... it wasn't like we were doing anything out of the ordinary.

...yet.

Tai tapped me to get my attention and when I looked at him, he gestured to the lady with his head. When the elevator came, he let the lady go in ahead of us and as we were walking in behind her, he whispered in my ear: "Play along."

The doors had just closed when Tai slipped his arm around my shoulders and gave me a squeeze. The touch, although it was minor, sent a little shiver down my spine and I hoped he hadn't felt it. He brushed my face lightly with his free hand and, swallowing a lump in my throat, I turned my head towards his and our lips met.

I tried to keep his words in my mind. 'Play along'. Right. A game. That's what it was.

Even if it was just a game, it didn't change the feelings that were bubbling inside of me. I could practically feel the old lady gaping at us, and I half-expected Tai to pull away since the goal had been reached, but instead he took it further; running his tongue along my lips until I parted them co-operatively and allowed his tongue to slide into my mouth. I had the feeling Tai wasn't just doing it for the shock factor anymore and, well... I knew I wasn't either.

The elevator stopped and the lady hurried out, but Tai and I didn't move away from each other. If anything, the lady's absence encouraged us to keep going.

Tai's hand slid down from my shoulders and slowly made its way down my back, eventually reaching my ass and squeezing. My heart jumped at the touch and I pressed closer to Tai, craving more. I knew that I wasn't acting straight, not at all, but I didn't really care as long as Tai's tongue was still in my mouth and his arms were around me.

The elevator stopped again, this time at Tai's floor, and when the doors opened Tai finally broke away from my lips. He took my wrist, pulling me out into the hall, and then began leading me down the hall to his apartment. I followed obediently and as soon as we got inside, Tai pressed his lips to mine again eagerly. I responded just as eagerly and we stood there just inside of the door, kissing, for a few minutes before Tai broke away again and began tugging me down the hall towards his bedroom. All I could think of were the signals my body was sending to me, and they were all in favor of what was happening.

Tai sat down on the bed, pulling me down with him, and then rolled us over so that he was on top of me. I buried my fingers in his hair and deepened the kiss, desperately wanting more but not knowing exactly how to go about it. Luckily, Tai got the message and unlatched himself from my lips, moving down to press kisses to my neck and then sucking gently at the skin. I let out a shaky breath, panting slightly from the lack of air I'd received while we were kissing, and then bit my lip as I realized just how good what he was doing felt.

Tai's hands moved to my shirt and before I knew it, we were both shirtless and he was kissing me again, the naked skin of his torso pressed against mine. His hands were skimming up and down my sides and they slowly travelled farther down, running over my thighs and squeezing. I could feel blood rushing to my groin and I knew I wasn't the only one becoming aroused when his body pressed against mine and I felt something hard pressing against my hip.

I gasped slightly when Tai reached a hand between my legs and squeezed, automatically separating my lips from his. He seemed pleased at my reaction and began working at my belt, quickly getting it undone and tossing it aside before moving to my pants. My stomach was tight with anxiety and it only grew worse as he unfastened my pants and then slid them down, leaving me in only my boxers. My throat was dry and when Tai moved his hands to the waistband of my boxers, my heart began beating so fast that I almost thought I was going to have a heart attack. As I watched, he slowly tugged those down too, freeing me from restraint and exposing me completely to him.

Tai wrapped his fingers around my rapidly hardening erection and shifted his hand up and down, stroking lightly. I shivered at his touch, a warm sensation spreading through me. I was biting my lip in anticipation and my anxiety grew when Tai bent down, pressing a kiss to my inner thigh. He looked up and met my eyes for a brief second, then returned his attention to my member, running his hand over it again. After a few seconds, causing my heart to leap up into my throat, he bent down and placed his mouth over the tip of me.

My stomach was in knots and my mind was barely functioning anymore. Tai sucked lightly and I let out a breath I hadn't known I'd been holding, moaning softly. Already, I was feeling the most pleasure I'd ever felt in my life.

Tai let his tongue loose, letting it swirl around my member a few times and causing me to moan again. I reached down and fisted a hand in his hair, biting my lip and letting my own head drop back onto the bed as Tai began to take more of me into his mouth. Whatever he was doing, I didn't want him to stop.

I nearly came right then and there when Tai began bobbing his head up and down, sucking as he went. The feeling couldn't be matched by anything I'd ever felt before. It numbed my mind and made my insides go wild and I never wanted it to stop.

Unfortunately, it did in fact have to come to an end. After what seemed like an endless amount of pleasure and bliss, I couldn't hold on any longer and climaxed, letting out a few gasping moans in the process. I felt like I was going to explode and, honestly, I was convinced that what had just happened to me was the best feeling in the world. I laid there with my eyes closed, basking in the pleasure, until it gradually began to fade and I realized that Tai was kissing his way up my body, gradually making his way to my lips. When our lips met, I kissed him deeply and passionately, almost feeling as if I were thanking him for just giving me the best experience of my life. Eventually he pulled away and, after another short kiss, got off of me.

"Be right back," he said, then left the room.

I laid there on his bed, still recovering, for a few long moments until what had just happened began to sink in. My face began to feel hot and I gathered my clothes, beginning to pull them on. I'd just let Tai give me a blowjob. Holy shit. So much for my straightness!

It wasn't like I was attracted to any other guys, though... just Tai. So, if it was just one guy, that didn't really make me gay or anything... and I could still be considered straight if what had happened was the only gay experience I ever had, right?

...I doubted that I'd be able to stop there, though. If Tai offered, I knew I wouldn't be able to turn him down- not since I knew how good it felt.

Tai returned to the room lacking the bulge that had been in his pants when he'd left. I realized absently that I probably should've offered to help him out with that, but it hadn't really been the first thing on my mind at the time.

"So," Tai said, giving me a little smile, "what do you think?"

"I... that was..." I was at a loss for words and just shook my head. "My God..."

"Good enough for you to come out of denial?"

The statement caught me off guard and I stared at him for a moment.

"...what?"

"Come on, Matt, you're not straight. Face it."

I frowned and opened my mouth, but he cut me off.

"Honestly, if you say you're straight one more time, I..." Tai trailed off and shook his head. "I don't know what the hell to say to you. You just let me give you a fucking blowjob with no problem whatsoever."

"That doesn't mean I'm gay."

"No, but you're definitely not straight!"

"That's not true," I argued, although I knew my argument was weak. "Just because I let you give me one random blowjob-"

"Oh, come on!" Tai shook his head with a snort. "Honestly, you are so far in denial that it's ridiculous."

"I'm not in denial!" I snapped.

"Sure you aren't. I don't know why it's so hard for you to admit... are your parents homophobic or something?"

"No," I answered automatically, then realized that I actually didn't know if they were. I'd been brought up around people who considered the subject of homosexuality taboo, so maybe my parents **were** homophobic... that didn't mean **I** was, though.

"I'm not homophobic," I said to him.

Tai rolled his eyes. "I know. If you were homophobic, I'm pretty sure you wouldn't have let me suck your dick just now. I'm just saying that if your parents are homophobic, I'll at least be able to understand why you won't just admit that you're not straight."

"I **am** straight!"

"No, you really aren't! God, why do you think being gay is a **bad** thing?"

"Because it's not normal!" I exclaimed.

Tai snorted. "That's the stupidest thing I've ever heard. Did it feel 'abnormal' to you while you were practically thrusting into my mouth?"

I felt my face flush and didn't know what to say, speechless. Truthfully, I didn't know why I felt the need to be labelled as 'straight' and nothing else but I couldn't help myself from fighting to keep the title.

"I don't like other guys," I mumbled in a last attempt. "...just you."

"Well, liking me isn't exactly an indicator that you're straight."

There was silence between us for several moments, then Tai pulled on his shirt and shook his head.

"You should probably go. Your dad is probably wondering where the hell you are."

I nodded and stood up, walking with Tai to the front door. I shoved my feet in my shoes and stepped outside of the apartment, then turned back around to face him hesitantly.

"...if I really was... y'know... not straight... then what would that make me? I mean, since I'm not gay either."

"It would make you not straight and not gay." Tai looked me in the eye. "Not everything has to be labelled, you know."

I stood there for another moment, contemplating Tai's words, then lowered my eyes. Mumbling a goodbye, I left his door and made my way down the hall.

I met up with my dad at TK's place and when he asked me where I'd been, I said that Tai and I had just been watching TV and lost track of time. As we drove back to our building, neither of us said a word. I was too busy thinking about how incredibly complicated my life had gotten, while he was probably thinking about how insane it was that TK was suddenly being brought back into his life. When we got home, I went straight to my room and lay down. Life was suddenly way too tiring.

**xXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx**

I didn't hear from Tai that evening or on Sunday, and things were a little tense between us when we met up to walk to school on Monday. Akira noticed this and asked us what was going on (more specifically, "What the fuck is wrong with you two?"), to which Tai just said "Don't worry about it". From the look he gave Akira, I knew he would be telling Akira exactly what had happened later on.

The tension between us lasted through that entire week, mostly because neither of us was willing to talk about the issue. Tai was waiting for me to let go of my obsession with being "straight", and I wasn't ready to let go just yet so we continued with our tense, slightly edgy friendship.

A call I received the next Saturday brightened my spirits somewhat. Initially when I picked up the phone, I had no idea who it was; all I heard from the other end was a jumble of words mixed together in one fast breath. The voice sounded familiar, though, and I spoke, puzzled.

"Sorry, what?"

"I got the test results!"

It was TK. I sat up a little straighter, slightly anxious.

"And?"

"You were right! It's crazy, but... we're really brothers!" TK let out a laugh of disbelief. "This is so weird."

"I know... I mean, I've heard about this kind of scenario so many times but... God, I never thought it would happen to me!"

"Me either. Wow... I'm not an only child." There was a pause, then TK's voice changed a bit. "And... I've pretty much been living a fucking lie."

I knew it must be hard for TK to find out the truth and, since he needed someone to talk to and we were already on the phone with each other, we ended up talking for a long while. Surprisingly, talking to each other was easy and I swore we instantly had a brotherly connection, however lame it sounds.

TK ended up coming over and we hung out for the day, then went out to dinner with my dad in the evening. It was nice to feel like a family, at least somewhat. I hadn't had that feeling since the fight between my mother and father and even before that I'd felt sort of detached, probably because my parents had been hiding so many important things from me. But now everything was out in the open and I had a brother I hadn't even known about.

TK and I did some brotherly bonding over the next month, and he made a big decision: that he wanted to live with my father and me since we were his "real" family. He knew that he might never feel as attached to my father and my mother as he was to Daron and Catherine, but he still wanted to do it- which meant that Daron, Catherine, and our parents would have to discuss that and the legal issues that came with it sometime. Also during that month or so, the tension between Tai and I cooled a bit and things were okay- not great and not bad, just okay.

I was beginning to think that my eventful life had finally settled, but then the day came where things picked up again. It was Friday, March 28th and Tai had come over to my house for the first time since my father and I had painted and were truly settled in.

"Nice," Tai commented as he walked into my room. "I like the colour."

I'd painted the walls of my room greyish-blue. I actually kind of liked my new room; even though it was smaller, it felt more cozy and comfortable since things were packed together rather tightly. My bed was in a corner, one side pushed up against a wall and the headboard on the wall perpendicular to that one. My computer desk was on the other end of the wall that my headboard was against. I had a TV in there with some video game systems and a VCR hooked up to it. My room was less neat than it had ever been before, which still didn't come close to Tai's mess, but there **were** things out of place and it felt good to have a room like that.

After spotting my video game systems, Tai insisted that we play some games. Although I had several game systems and games, I'd never really been a big fan of video games so Tai had a good laugh at my playing skills after he beat me several times at various games.

"You suck, man," Tai teased as he beat me yet again.

"Shut up. You've had a lot more practice than me, so it's not even a fair game."

Tai smirked a bit. "Are we talking about playing video games or sucking?"

I was caught off-guard and immediately became flustered, literally dropping my controller. My face felt hot and I didn't bother to pick it up, knowing that Tai was watching me with the same little smirk and had little interest in the game anymore. Of all times to bring something like that up... why then, after things were finally becoming normal again between us?

I swallowed a lump in my throat, still not looking at him. What the hell was I supposed to say? Never mind that, what was I supposed to **do**?

My head quickly snapped to look at him when I felt his hand on my leg. He was moving towards me and before I knew it, his lips were on mine... and I wasn't protesting. In fact, I was doing quite the opposite. Without even thinking, I'd begun kissing back and was pressing closer to Tai, heat rushing through my body instantly.

The moments flew by in a heated blur. In what seemed like seconds, Tai and I had completely shed all of our clothing and he had me in his lap, our erections pressing together in a way that drove me absolutely crazy. He was stroking our members together while simultaneously sucking at my neck and so I was distracted by several things... which explained why I didn't realize what Tai's hand was doing on my ass until I felt a strange pressure and then one of his fingers slowly slid into my entrance.

I let out a small gasp, more from surprise than anything else, and Tai moved from my neck up to my lips. As we kissed, he slowly wormed another finger inside of me. It felt really weird and I squirmed a little in discomfort. However, when Tai began to move his fingers around, pleasure began to take over and I murmured a little into his mouth when his fingers sank deeper. After a short time, he removed his fingers and then broke our kiss, lifting me from his lap and nudging me gently onto my hands and knees. He then reached beside him where a small container of lubricant was resting-it was then that I realized he must have planned it-and coated himself with it. This barely registered in my mind, though, and the reality of everything didn't hit me fully until Tai was pressed against my entrance. I swallowed a lump in my throat, my stomach tightening in nervousness, and Tai bent to kiss my back lightly before beginning to insert himself.

I drew in a sharp breath as he made his way in and bit my lip at the painful burning sensation. As he continued to push inside, I choked out a small "Fuck!" and he paused but I shook my head, signalling for him to keep going. After all, he was already halfway in. Once Tai finished inserting himself into me, he wasted no time in proceeding to move in and out, pushing deeper into me with each thrust. The initial shock started to wear off and pleasure began to erase the pain. It wasn't long before I was moaning shamelessly, pushing my hips back in an attempt to bury him deeper inside of me and receiving each thrust greedily. Absently, my mind came to a conclusion that being straight was way overrated.

Tai's thrusts were becomingly increasingly fast and deep by the second and after an immeasurable amount of time, he reached around and began to pump me. My erection was throbbing and this sensation only intensified when Tai let out a gasp and a series of moans, pushing deep inside of me and reaching his climax. Warmth spread throughout me at this feeling and I shuddered in pleasure before approaching my own climax and coming in Tai's hand.

After Tai removed himself from me he rolled me onto my back and then lay on top of me, pressing his lips to mine and kissing me deeply. We laid there for several minutes, kissing and caressing, before cleaning ourselves up and then laying down together. I didn't intend to fall asleep, but after some time I found myself drifting to sleep and didn't resist, sinking into a pleasant slumber.

**xXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx**

When I woke up a short amount of time later, Tai's skin wasn't pressed against mine as it had been and I opened my eyes to discover that Tai wasn't beside me. There was a blanket covering me, though, and I smiled a bit at that; it was a sweet little gesture.

"Hey."

I blinked and rolled over onto my side, looking to the door where Tai was standing. He smiled at me and walked over, sitting on the bed and leaning down to kiss me briefly. I returned the kiss and when it was broken, he spoke.

"I've got to go home-my mom doesn't want Kari to be there alone-but I didn't want to leave while you were asleep in case you thought... well, you know."

Knowing that Tai cared enough to consider something like that made me feel warm and happy inside. If that meant I wasn't straight, well... then so be it.

"Call me later?" I requested.

Tai nodded. "I will."

He didn't move, though, and after a few moments of staring at me and making me feel slightly self-conscious, he smiled a bit and shook his head.

"That was amazing, by the way."

I blushed a bit, but smiled back. "I thought so too."

"Glad to hear it." Tai placed a hand on my thigh and squeezed a bit, then stood. "Are you going to come lock the door behind me?"

I nodded and sat up, then grabbed my boxers from the floor and pulled them on before getting up and following him to the front door. He shoved his feet in his shoes and opened the door, then leaned in and planted a brief kiss on my lips.

"I'll talk to you later, okay?"

I nodded. "Bye."

"Bye," he echoed, then gave me one last smile before walking out the door.

I locked the door and then leaned against it, mind flooded with thoughts. I could feel a dull soreness from mine and Tai's actions, but it was a small price to pay for the incredible pleasure I'd received. Letting my body drive me instead of my mind had turned out to be one of the best decisions I'd ever made.

...unless you counted the fact that I had no idea what to refer to mine and Tai's relationship as. I'd feel weird bringing it up, too, so I hoped that he'd address it when he called me later.

I was watching TV later that night when the phone rang. I picked it up on the first ring, hoping for it to be Tai.

"Hello?" I answered it.

"Hey."

Something fluttered in my stomach at the sound of Tai's voice and I smiled even though he couldn't see me.

"Hi. What're you doing?"

"Not much. You?"

"Just watching TV... well, more like sitting in front of the TV and thinking..."

"Yeah? About what?" Tai asked.

"Stuff," I replied nonchalantly.

"Like the 'stuff' we did earlier?" I could practically hear the grin in Tai's voice.

"Maybe," I said, unable to stop a giggle from escaping my lips. And when I say a giggle, I truly mean a giggle. It was quite high-pitched and very embarrassing.

Tai laughed. "I didn't know straight guys giggled like that," he teased.

"Shut up," I said, grateful he wasn't there in person so he couldn't see my blush. "And I'm not straight," I added as an afterthought.

"No?" Tai sounded amused. "What are you, then?"

"I don't know... whatever you want me to be, as long as it means we can do that again."

"And what if I want you to be my boyfriend?"

My heart skipped a beat and I knew instantly that what I felt for Tai was more than enough for me to say yes, even if it **would** take some time for me to get used to being referred to as Tai's boyfriend.

"Like I said," I responded softly, "I'll be whatever you want me to be."

"I want you to want it, too."

"I do," I answered honestly and shyly.

"Good... because I'm an awesome boyfriend."

I laughed.

"And, because I'm such an awesome boyfriend-as you'll find out-I think I should get to have a special nickname for you."

"A special nickname? Like what?"

"Yama."

"Where did that come from?"

"It just popped into my head a little while ago. It sounds cute, you're cute... so yeah."

Yama. I actually kind of liked it.

When my dad got home, he was puzzled by my happy mood, but luckily didn't ask the reason. I didn't know if I wanted to tell him, then or ever, and I didn't really feel like thinking about it either- I was too busy thinking about the fact that I, Yamato Ishida, had a boyfriend. I'd never thought in a million years that something like that would happen to me.

...but I was glad it had.

**xXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx**

On Monday, Tai and I met at our usual meeting spot. Akira wasn't coming to school-which wasn't a big surprise-so we set off without him down the street.

"I told Mimi we were together, by the way," Tai mentioned. "I hope that's okay."

"Do you think she's going to tell people?" I asked him, slightly nervous.

Tai shook his head. "I told her to keep it to herself. I figured you wouldn't want a lot of people knowing."

"Who else knows?" Okay, so I wasn't straight, but I didn't want everyone knowing!

"Just Akira, don't worry."

I nearly breathed a sigh of relief.

Mimi is surprisingly good at keeping secrets. Tai and I were chatting with her before school started and she didn't mention it once; probably because there were a lot of people in the hall. I almost forgot that she knew until lunch. Tai and I were at my locker and she came up grinning slyly.

"So, how's the new couple?" she asked, raising an eyebrow teasingly.

"Great," Tai responded for the both of us, putting an arm around my shoulders and smiling at me. He leaned down for a kiss and I met him in one upon realizing that there was no one else in that hallway.

"You guys are too cute," Mimi said, shaking her head. "I must warn you, though," she said, turning to me, "some people **will** assume you're going out with him. I mean... Tai hasn't exactly made it a secret to the world that he's gay."

Tai started laughing and I watched him with a raised eyebrow.

"...am I missing something?"

"Well," Mimi began, "one day Tai decided he didn't care who knew. And he thought it'd be funny to do it in the caf. So he stands up on one of the tables and shouts 'I fuck guys up the ass'!"

"Oh my God." I stared at Tai in shock for a moment, then couldn't help but laugh also.

"People didn't know if he was joking or not," Mimi added. "A lot of people thought it was a dare or just him joking around... but over time, most people have found out that it's true."

"Oh my God, you idiot," I said, shoving Tai lightly.

He shrugged, still grinning. "It was funny. Besides, I don't care who knows."

"I do!"

He rolled his eyes. "You shouldn't."

"Well, I do, so don't go around telling people or anything."

"I won't. And neither will Mimi." Tai looked at Mimi for confirmation, and she nodded her head.

Luckily Tai made sure not to do anything too "couple-like" during school, and after school ended for the day I decided to go over to his place. Unfortunately, he'd forgotten his keys that morning.

We stood in front of Tai's door for about a minute while he searched his pockets... and came up with nothing. He turned to me sheepishly.

"I think I forgot my keys this morning. And my mom's probably out." He rang the doorbell anyway, but there was predictably no answer.

"How did you forget your keys?" I asked in disbelief. "Didn't you have to lock the door?"

"Kari locked it for me. Oh, hey, speaking of Kari- she should be home soon, so we won't have to wait long."

I nodded and shoved my hands in my pockets, rocking back and forth on my heels. We were both silent for a few moments and then Tai took my arm, tugging me forward a bit and wrapping an arm around my waist. He pressed a brief kiss to my lips and smiled.

"The second I saw you, I knew I had to have you. You're just too goddamn cute."

I didn't know what to say to that, so I pulled Tai down for another kiss. When it was broken, he spoke again.

"What did you think when you saw me?"

I thought back to the first second I'd seen Tai and then laughed in spite of myself, shaking my head.

"Actually... I thought you were hot."

Tai broke into a grin. "Oh, really, Mr. Straight?"

I stuck my tongue out at him. "Yes, really... and then I convinced myself that I didn't **actually** find you attractive because I'm not a girl."

Tai shook his head in amusement. "You were so far in denial for so long."

"Well, it's kind of hard to admit you're attracted to a guy after you've been straight for sixteen years."

"Fair enough." Tai ran his hands down my sides lightly, then rested them on my waist and tilted his head a bit. "Speaking of your 'straight' life... what's the furthest you've gone with a girl?"

I blushed a bit. "...not far."

"As in?"

"As in... like... not even a hand job," I confessed shyly.

Tai stared at me in awe. "Are you kidding?"

I shook my head.

"Holy shit. How many girls have you even kissed?"

"I don't know," I hedged.

Tai raised an eyebrow at me, waiting.

"...two."

"Two?" Tai repeated in disbelief.

I nodded, slightly embarrassed.

"Jesus... you're more of a virgin than I thought. Or, at least, you **were**." Tai shook his head and gave me a guilty grin. "Man... now I feel kind of bad. I probably should've taken things slower."

I shook my head. "It doesn't matter... besides, now I know what I've been missing out on."

Tai grinned, then pulled me in for a kiss while simultaneously sliding his hands down to my ass and groping lightly.

"Oh, please."

I quickly distanced myself from Tai, feeling my face heat up. When I saw who it was, I was even more humiliated- it was Kari. However, she just rolled her eyes and shook her head, stepping in front of us to unlock the door.

"Get a room, you two. Or at least a closet."

"We **would** be in my room," Tai replied matter-of-factly, "but I forgot my keys."

"Idiot."

The door popped open and Kari walked inside. I was still embarrassed at being caught, but Kari hadn't even seemed fazed.

"Does Kari know?" I whispered to Tai as we walked down the hall to his bedroom.

"Know what?" Tai looked confused.

"That you're... you know."

Tai snorted. "Of course she knows."

"Do your parents know?"

"Yeah." Tai gave me a strange look. "Why?"

I shrugged.

We reached Tai's room and he shut the door behind us, then sat down on his bed and pulled me into his lap. After pressing a kiss to my neck, he spoke again.

"My mom thinks it's cute or something and my dad was kind of upset at first, but he's learned to deal with it." Tai ran his hands briefly over my thighs. "You scared to tell your parents?"

"I never could," I said, shaking my head.

"Why not?"

"I just couldn't. I mean, all my life I've been living up to their 'perfect son' expectation. Being gay isn't part of that. And, well... obviously things have gotten messed up recently, but still... I mean... what would they think of me?"

"So they **ar********e** homophobic, then."

"No, I just don't want them to think less of me." The moment it came out, I knew how it sounded and I winced.

"Yama-"

"I know, being gay isn't a bad thing. But... well, I don't want to disappoint them if **they** think it is."

"Yama..." Tai sighed and shook his head. "Babe, I know this is one of the most overused lines ever, but... just be yourself. They're your parents! They're going to accept you for who you are. Or, at least, they **should**."

"But what if they don't?"

"What do you really think is going to happen? You think your dad's going to kick you out or something?"

"Well, no..."

"Then what do you have to lose?"

I was silent for a few moments. Tai ran a hand through my hair and, when I turned to him, pressed a soft kiss to my lips.

"You don't have to. I'm just saying that it would probably take some stress off of you."

"..." I leaned my head against Tai's shoulder and let out a small sigh. "...I'm scared to."

"That's normal. Just... don't worry about it for a while. You'll work up the nerve eventually."

About an hour later, Mikomi was over and she and Kari were gossiping in Kari's room. Tai and I were sitting in the living room watching TV and, when the doorbell rang, Tai got up to answer it. He returned with Akira, whose hair was now jet black.

Akira nodded at me, and I responded with a "hey". Mikomi must've sensed Akira in the apartment or something, because she suddenly bounced into the living room area.

"Akira!" she exclaimed. "Hi!"

Kari entered the room behind her, rolling her eyes. She smiled at Akira, and he nodded in return.

"So what've you all been doing?" Akira asked.

"Nothing in particular," Tai said. "Why, you got an idea?"

"No." Akira sat down in the armchair and picked up the remote, flipping through channels.

Tai sat back down beside me, putting an arm around my shoulders casually. Mikomi and Kari sat down at the other end of the couch, Mikomi's gaze resting not-so-discreetly on Akira. After some time, Akira spoke.

"Tai, give Mikomi a camera." Akira's eyes barely left the screen.

Tai looked at him in confusion. "Huh? Why?"

"Tell her to take a picture, it'll last longer." At this point, Akira looked at Mikomi and smirked.

Mikomi blushed. "I wasn't staring at you, I was just thinking! And when I think, I stare off into space! It just happened to be in your direction!"

Akira snorted. "Whatever." He turned back to the TV. "And Kari? Tell your brother and Matt to just kiss already."

"What?" Mikomi's head snapped towards us. My cheeks were suddenly hot and I avoided her eyes. She turned to Kari, who obviously wasn't surprised. "Did you know about this?"

Kari shrugged. "Yeah, I was going to tell you but I thought it'd be more fun this way."

"Oh my gosh!" Mikomi stared at us in awe, then squealed and clapped her hands together. "That is so cute!"

Tai rolled his eyes, but was grinning.

"Those two were locked up in Tai's room before you came," Kari told Mikomi. "I don't even want to think about what they were doing."

"Yeah, you probably don't," Tai said with a grin, and I slapped him lightly on the shoulder. He laughed and then grabbed me into a kiss.

"Nothing more than PG-13 please," Akira remarked.

Tai rolled his eyes. "Ignore this guy, he's half-gay himself."

"What?" Mikomi gaped at Akira.

Akira pointed a finger at Tai. "Hey, shut up! I like girls, okay? Sure, I'll fuck the occasional guy, but I don't go out looking for them!"

"Akira, you're bi?" Mikomi was still in shock.

"...I prefer to call it straight with a twist."

Tai snorted. "My ass."

"I'm going to **kick** your ass if you say one more word," Akira retorted.

Tai smirked, but shut up. I was a bit surprised, but kept my mouth shut. I'd kind of just assumed Akira was straight, but now that I thought about it... well, I couldn't see him in a relationship with a guy, but I could definitely see him having sex with one randomly.

"There's nothing on," Akira said, and stood up. "I'm going to the video store. Anyone coming with me?" He looked pointedly at Mikomi.

Mikomi immediately got up and Kari rolled he eyes but stood up also. Akira pointed the girls towards the door and then nodded at Tai and me.

"Make sure you're not doing anything explicit when we come back."

"We'll try," Tai said with a grin, and the three of them left.

Of course, Akira's comment kind of put Tai in the mood and, well... let's just say that the rest is very pleasant history.

**xXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx**


	8. Handle This

DISCLAIMER: I don't own Digimon or rights to any of the characters, I am not making a profit from this, etc.

**Kukachi  
VII: Handle This  
**by: neo-chan

That Friday, I skipped school for the first time in my life.

It was after second period and I was on my way to Art class. I spotted Tai and he stopped me before I could get any further down the hall.

"Teacher's not here. Let's go."

"What?"

"Let's just leave. It's a substitute, we're not gonna do anything."

"Doesn't the school call home?"

Tai shrugged. "They might not. And if they do, just make sure your dad doesn't get the message or tell him they must've made a mistake. Come on!"

I let Tai drag me down the hall. "Wait... are we skipping the whole rest of the day?"

"Might as well."

"Are you kidding?"

"Live a little, Matt!" Tai grinned at me.

I couldn't believe I was letting him convince me to skip school. It did seem kind of exciting, though.

We reached my locker and Tai opened it for me. He leaned against the locker beside mine as I began to put the stuff I'd need to study in my bag and spoke.

"So what do you wanna do?" he asked me.

"I don't know. You're the one with the ideas."

"We can drop your bag off at your place first if you want."

"I can just leave it at your place, it's closer." I looked at him. "Where's your bag?"

"I'm leaving it here, I don't need it. So we'll stop by my place first and then go somewhere, alright?"

"Okay, where?"

"We'll figure it out as we go along."

"You don't have any clue, do you?"

"Nope." Tai grinned at me.

I rolled my eyes, but couldn't help but smile. Tai picked up my bag and when I closed my locker and turned to take it from him, he shook his head.

"I'll carry it."

I just looked at him for a moment, then spoke.

"I'm not a girl, you know."

"Believe me, I know." Tai smirked.

I ignored Tai's suggestive comment and reached for the bag again.

"Then let me carry it."

"Just let me do it. I want to."

I gave in and let Tai take it, hiding a smile. Although I'd put up a fight, I thought it was actually kind of sweet of him to carry my bag for me.

"Fine, let's go."

**xXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx**

Tai pushed open the door to his apartment and let me go in, then followed after me.

"We can't stay here in case my mom comes home," he said. "And the school usually calls later on, so we should come back here around then to make sure she doesn't get the call. Or, to make things easier..."

Tai disappeared out the front door. I stood there confused, and the confusion increased when he returned with a girl.

"This is Serina," he said. "She's my neighbour."

"Hi," I said, unsure of why he'd brought her over.

"Hi," she said with a smile.

"Hey, don't get **too** friendly, that's my boyfriend." Tai grinned at her to let her know he was joking.

"You always get the good ones, don't you?" Serina shook her head. "Anyway, what do you want me to say?"

"Just tell them that I had permission to skip."

"Okay." Serina picked up the phone and dialed a number, then changed her voice slightly. "Hello, this is Mrs. Yagami; Taichi's mother... yes, I just wanted to sign him out... yes, thank you. Goodbye."

Serina hung up. "That was easy."

"Yeah, my school's really stupid. Thanks."

"No problem." Serina turned to me. "Nice to meet you...?"

"Yamato," I filled in. "Nice to meet you too."

Serina waved at us both and left. Tai and I sat down on the couch and watched TV for a while, then decided that we had to get out of the house in case his mom got home. So Tai asked me what I wanted to do.

I shrugged in response. "I don't know."

Tai rolled his eyes. "You're just full of ideas, aren't you?"

I shrugged again.

"...fine, let's go visit Akira."

We chatted mindlessly as we walked to Akira's, which only took a few minutes. After Akira joined us-he'd just woken up-we happened to pass my house and Tai came up with the idea of getting Akira to pose as my dad and call the school. It worked, just like Serina's call had worked for Tai. I was surprised at how bad the school's security was, but relieved.

As we walked, Akira fumbled in his pocket for something and finally retrieved a cigarette and a lighter. Tai groaned.

"Jesus, not this again... didn't you quit?"

"About five times." Akira gave Tai a crooked grin.

"When you die of lung cancer, don't come crying to me."

"I can't if I'm dead, can I?"

Tai glared at him, and Akira lit up the cigarette. His eyes flickered towards me.

"I'm assuming you don't smoke."

I shook my head, and Akira nodded.

"You don't seem the type." He held the stick out to me. "Wanna try it anyway?"

"Akira!" Tai batted his hand away, gaping at him.

I couldn't help but laugh. "Tai, don't worry, I'm not gonna start smoking."

"Good." Tai shot Akira another glare. "Don't try to make people smoke!"

"I wasn't," Akira said in defense. "I was just asking him if he wanted to try. Protective much?"

"Well, I'd rather you not offer death to my boyfriend. And be warned that if I see a pack of cigarettes lying around, I'll break each one and throw them in the garbage."

"And I'll buy more."

"No you won't because you're going to be good and quit again! Isn't that right?"

Akira just rolled his eyes.

Tai turned to me. "Don't smoke," he said plainly.

"Have you smoked?" I asked him.

Akira snorted. "Tai? He couldn't live without-"

"Shut up!" Tai elbowed Akira.

"No, I want to hear this." I looked at Akira. "Tai smoked?"

"Hell yeah! He was pretty hooked, man... if he didn't have a cigarette in his hand, he wasn't happy."

"And that's how I know they're bad for you," Tai said through clenched teeth, shooting daggers at Akira with his eyes. "I learned my lesson the hard way. You don't have to."

Tai, a chain smoker? I couldn't picture it.

After that, Akira continued to tell me stories about Tai's past. I could tell that he was careful about mentioning certain things, though, and he made sure not to touch on anything too serious. However, I had to wonder what other things Tai was hiding from me about his past.

We walked around the neighbourhood for a while and then Akira left us because he had to go meet some people. He was also going to a concert later, which he invited us to but Tai refused. Once Akira had left, Tai confessed that he wanted to take me to a tame concert first because he didn't think I'd be able to stand a "real" one.

We went back to Tai's place and hung out in his room. Not long after we'd gotten comfortable, Tai brought up the smoking thing.

"It was a really bad habit," he admitted. "Luckily it wasn't for a very long period of time, but it might've been if I hadn't come to my senses."

"What made you quit?" I questioned.

"My cousin... she died from second-hand smoke. My aunt smoked all the time. She still does."

I felt guilty for bringing it up. "I'm sorry."

"Nothing you can do, right? I figured if I didn't want to die and I didn't want anyone around me to die, I should stop. Akira stopped then too. But he keeps going back... he's on and off, you know?" Tai shook his head. "I can't stand when people smoke."

Not knowing what else to do, I put my arms around Tai in a hug. He smiled and circled his own arms around me.

"Thanks." He kissed me on the forehead. "I might as well get this out while we're on the subject... I used to do some drugs with Akira and people. And I don't just mean weed or anything... I actually did crack a couple of times. And there was this period of time that I was always wasted... and then there's the whole 'pyro' thing... I used to be like Akira, setting things on fire all the time... and then for some reason Akira started going to random raves and I went along, and you know there's always ecstacy at those things..." Tai paused. "...and lots of sex."

I almost didn't want to ask. "Did you...?"

Tai nodded, looking kind of shameful. "Yeah... I think that was actually when I realized that I didn't like girls at all. There were just so many guys willing to mess around, no strings attached... it was fucking perfect. At the time, I mean. And, well... that's where Akira had his first encounters with gay sex." Tai shook his head. "Believe me, if I could go back and change things, I would in a second. Everything was so fucked up."

I was silent, not really knowing what to say. Tai definitely had a complicated, not to mention screwed-up, past. I was just glad that I'd met him **after** all that stuff.

"I'm not the only one who changed," Tai mentioned. "I actually changed Akira a lot. You don't even wanna know some of the shit he used to do. It's all in the past, though, so I guess we shouldn't dwell on it."

I took that as Tai's indication that he wanted to change the subject and complied. I knew it must be hard to bring up a past like that. It made me appreciate the person Tai was even more, though, knowing he'd been through all that and still turned out the way he did.

Kari got home from school soon after that. She left shortly after to go for a walk to Mikomi's house and we accompanied her. On our way to Mikomi's we passed Daisuke's house and decided to stop by. He was bored and suggested that we play street hockey.

Everyone agreed to the idea. I'd never really played street hockey before, but I knew what it was. However, I didn't know the rules and such and I wasn't really that good on rollerblades even though I could ice skate.

"Don't worry," Tai had said to me with a wave of his hand. "I'll teach you."

So we went around finding people to play. In the end we wound up with nine people: me, Tai, Mikomi, Kari, Daisuke, Chris Masaki, Rika Masaki(Chris's younger sister who was in Kari and Mikomi's grade), Tyson Harada who happened to be Tai's cousin who was visiting, and Kaoru Takahashi. Everyone brought a pair of rollerblades with them.

After gathering the things we needed, we set up on a path behind Kaoru's apartment. We had two nets, eight hockey sticks, a few tennis balls, and eight pairs of rollerblades.

"Okay," Tai took charge. "Someone's gotta be the referee."

"I'll be the referee," volunteered Mikomi.

"Great. So, team captains. Votes?"

"Tai and Daisuke," Kari said, and everyone agreed.

Tai shrugged. "That was easy. Dai, you can have first pick if you want."

The teams were: Daisuke, Kari, Tyson, and Kaoru; and me, Tai, Rika, and Chris. Everyone put on a pair of rollerblades and Tai explained the rules to me. Chris and Tyson volunteered to be the goalies and we took our positions.

Because I'd never actually played hockey before, our team lost. Luckily it was just for fun, so no one cared too much about the score. After the game, my legs were sore from being on rollerblades for so long and Tai and I went to my house. Once we got there, I collapsed onto the couch.

Tai chuckled and sat down beside me, lifting my legs so he could sit and then letting them rest across his lap.

"Tired?"

I groaned in reply.

"Sore?"

"Are you kidding me?" I closed my eyes and concentrated on not moving a limb. Tai began massaging my thighs.

I think Tai just wanted to touch me, but I wasn't going to complain. However, after a while it was threatening to tease me to arousal... especially because Tai's hands kept getting closer and closer to my crotch. When his hand dipped very obviously between my legs, I met his eyes and he grinned at me. Apparently he felt like fooling around.

...and I kinda did too.

Tai leaned in for a kiss and I returned the gesture generously, allowing him possession of my lips. The kiss deepened slowly and I let Tai lift me off the couch and carry me to my room. He placed me down on the bed and laid on top of me, kissing me passionately. It didn't take long before we began to shed our clothing, first removing our shirts. Tai began kissing his way down my chest and his tongue darted out over a nipple, then he stopped to tease it a bit with his mouth. I never would've thought it would feel good, but it definitely did. Tai had me hard in no time, only worsening my condition when he moved up to my neck and attacked the skin with kisses, light sucking, and gentle bites. I knew I'd have visible marks there later on, but couldn't bring myself to care at that moment.

Our pants were the next to go and, shortly after, our boxers too. Once we were both completely nude, Tai pounced on me and began trailing kisses over my whole body before moving down and beginning to take me into his mouth. I let myself sink into pleasure as Tai sucked gently, then proceeded to bob his head up and down my length.

It was over before I knew it and I pulled Tai up to my mouth for a few passionate kisses before moving from underneath him and pushing him onto his back, effectively surprising him. Tai's eyebrows shot up but he didn't protest and I began kissing my way down his body. When I reached his hard member and hesitated, Tai threaded a few fingers through my hair, making me look up at him.

"You don't have to, you know," he murmured.

That just made me want to do it more. So, swallowing my anxiety, I bent down and placed my mouth over the tip of his length, sucking lightly. I had absolutely no idea what I was doing, so I just tried to imitate what Tai had done to me. Slowly, I took more of Tai into my mouth and, let me tell you, it was weird having his cock in my mouth. But I wanted him to feel the pleasure he'd given me. I highly doubted I was doing anything right but when I began moving my head up and down and sucking, Tai let out a soft moan and this encouraged me-not to mention relieved me-, taking away some of my nervousness.

After some time, Tai warned me that he was about to come and I released him from my mouth, knowing that I definitely wouldn't be able to swallow. Instead I moved up to his lips and kissed him deeply as I ran my hand over his erection in a slightly shy way. Tai took my hand and guided it, urging me to pump him faster and less gently. Before long, Tai came and then pulled me into a series of deep kisses which lasted for several minutes until we both had no air left. I smiled at him shyly and he shook his head.

"That was pretty damn good for your first blowjob."

"Really?"

"Yeah. You're a quick learner."

I was pleased that I'd managed to please Tai, and we laid there kissing for a few minutes before I decided to go shower. As I stood with the water pouring down over my body, I closed my eyes for a brief moment and took a minute to let my thoughts wander, thinking about the future and what it might hold... and what I **wanted** it to hold. Even though I'd been with Tai for only a short time, it was already hard to picture myself without him. However, it was also hard not to picture myself as the boy I was raised to be; to live a traditional life and get married and have children. I'd never really thought about whether I actually **wanted** to get married and have children, though... I'd kind of just accepted it as my fate. Now, though, I was starting to question it.

I jumped, startled, when the shower curtain opened and looked to see Tai standing there. I'd been so lost in my thoughts that I hadn't even noticed the bathroom door open and Tai walk in.

"I figured I might as well just shower with you," Tai said, stepping in the shower. "...besides, it's not like I could pass up a chance to see you wet and naked."

I couldn't help but laugh, but my laugh quickly faded when Tai began running his hands down my body. He was staring at me openly, seemingly taking in every detail of my body, which caused me to feel slightly self-conscious. I knew I must be blushing, and when Tai's gaze reached my eyes, I met it shyly.

"You're so..." Tai shook his head. "I don't even know. You're just... perfect."

Tai's lips met mine, one thing led to another, and soon we were both very aroused and very eager to do something about it. As our bodies rubbed against each other and Tai sucked at my neck, I realized that I wanted more. I wanted to feel him inside of me again. Apparently Tai wanted the same thing because he moved his hand behind me and plunged two fingers in, moving them around and then slowly pushing them in and out. It felt really good and I didn't know how he could evoke such pleasure with just two fingers, but I desperately wanted more.

"Tai," I groaned, "please... I want you to..." I trailed off into a moan when his fingers sank deep into me, brushing a spot that left me speechless. My eyes fluttered shut and Tai pressed a kiss to my lips before speaking.

"To what?" he teased lightly.

I didn't respond, biting my lip as he worked his fingers around. I almost questioned myself for a second, wondering if the pleasure could even get even better, but I knew it could. I was too immersed in pleasure to speak, though, and Tai prompted me.

"To what?" he asked again, pausing the movement of his fingers for a moment- just long enough for me to get out what I needed to.

"Fuck me," I murmured breathlessly.

"All you had to do was ask," Tai said, and I opened my eyes to find him grinning. He withdrew his fingers, nearly making me whimper at the loss, and then stepped out of the shower. Before I could wonder why, he pulled me out as well and then gently pushed me to my knees. I caught on quickly and leaned over the edge of the bathtub, resting on my arms and feeling anxiety build up inside of me. I barely had time to anticipate what was about to happen, however, because Tai had himself lubed up and pressed against my entrance in only seconds.

I bit my lip hard when he began to push himself in, trying to remind myself that the pain was worth it. After Tai made his way in and began to move, it took me a few seconds to adjust but when I did, I remembered exactly **why** the pain was worth it. Tai's thrusts were hard and fast, rocking my whole body with the force of each thrust, and it didn't take long before both of couldn't hold on any longer and came. I knew I would be sore later, but if that was the price I had to pay for such pleasure, then so be it.

Tai and I retreated to my room afterwards, pulling on some clothes and then laying on my bed together. I felt warm and comfortable and happy and didn't want him to leave... which led me to a proposal.

"Do you wanna sleep over?" I asked him.

"Definitely," Tai answered without hesitation. "I don't think I'm even capable of leaving you... except maybe for a little bit to go get my stuff from my place."

I laughed and, after stalling for a little while, Tai reluctantly left to get his things. In the short span of time that Tai was gone, my dad arrived home. I told him that Tai was sleeping over and he gave me some money for pizza, then retreated to his room. Soon after Tai got back, we ordered the pizza and ate, then watched some TV, and eventually went back my room. Tai beat me at a handful of video games before I suggested watching a movie. He selected one that we both agreed on and we curled up together to watch it.

I fell asleep sometime during the movie and woke up at around 10:00AM on Saturday. Sunlight was streaming through the blinds and I shut my eyes again, rolling over to face Tai and cuddling into him slightly. I let out a small, content sigh and was almost asleep again when someone cleared their throat.

I opened my eyes and saw my dad standing at the door with a raised eyebrow. Heat rushing to my face and panic taking over me, I untangled myself from Tai frantically and sat up, trying to think of something to say quickly. My dad beat me to it.

"I'm not going to ask." He shut the door and I heard his footsteps fade away.

I stared after him for a few moments. Shit. What was I supposed to do? Or say? What if he wanted to talk to me later about it? What if he was going to call my mother and tell her?

I convinced myself that I was overreacting and laid back down next to Tai. I was too paranoid to fall back to sleep, though, and eventually Tai woke up.

He stretched briefly and then rested an arm around my waist, pressing a light kiss to my lips.

"Morning."

"My dad saw us in bed together."

Tai blinked. "...what?"

"A little while ago. My dad came in and he saw us laying here together, and I don't know what to do!"

Tai chuckled lightly, hearing the worry in my voice. "Calm down. It could be worse, he could've walked in on us fucking. Did he say anything?"

"No... he just said he's 'not going to ask'. But he'll probably suspect us now, and every time I look at him I'm gonna know he thinks I'm gay!"

Tai rolled his eyes, but smiled. "Don't worry."

"Don't worry? Are you kidding?"

"If your dad had a problem with it, he wouldn't have just walked away. So just let it be. I'd tell him if I were you, but..." Tai shrugged.

Luckily my dad didn't mention it later and I made a mental note to make sure that my door was locked whenever Tai and I were in there alone, just in case.

Monday rolled around and Akira, Tai, and I walked to school together as usual. The day started out fine and everything went normally until second period. I was sitting in my seat waiting for Hazel and Kim to arrive when I saw a familiar figure walk in the door and froze. He made his way over to the teacher, handing her a course change slip, then coolly swept the classroom with his gaze before it landed on me. A smirk formed on his lips and he began sauntering over to me. My mind panicked. He was planning to sit beside me. What could I do?

Narrowed, ugly eyes bore into mine.

"Is this seat taken?"

I didn't respond, and Kouji slipped into the desk beside me. He smirked.

"You didn't think you could hide from me forever, did you? Tai can only protect you for so long."

I stiffened, inching as far away as I could get. How was I supposed to survive for the rest of the semester with him beside me? Every time he so much as twitched, I would get nervous- and with good reason.

I kept my eyes trained to the front, but was very aware of every move Kouji made. Hazel and Kim walked in the classroom door and Hazel gave me a puzzled glance. I guess she knew about the troubles between Kouji and I. If only they'd walked in a few minutes earlier, maybe Kouji wouldn't have dared to sit next to me.

During class, I was extremely paranoid. I could've sworn I felt his hand on me several times, but it was just my imagination. Or, at least, it was until nearly the end of the period.

I felt a hand on my leg and jumped, then quickly looked down to find that there was, indeed, a hand on my leg and I wasn't going crazy. Forcing down the urge to jump out of my chair and run out of the room, I instead looked at Kouji. He smirked at me and then, in one swift movement, plunged his hand down my pants and grabbed hold of me.

All I wanted was to get out of there. While trying to think of a way to escape without having the whole class see what Kouji was doing, I managed to spit out a "Get your hand off of me."

"What's the matter?" Kouji asked, leaning in close and dropping his voice to a taunting whisper. "You don't like anyone but Tai touching you?"

The bell rang and I felt a surge of relief run through me. I managed to pull Kouji's hand out of my pants quickly and then jumped up from my seat, all but running out of the classroom. I felt a shiver run through me and walked faster, not feeling quite safe... not to mention feeling kind of violated.

When I got to Art class, I was glad to be away from Kouji and surrounded by people I knew. Instead of normal desks, in that class we sat at big, extended tables. Tai, Akira, Mimi, Hazel, and I always sat at one table. Slowly everyone trickled in the door and before I could wonder if I was supposed to bring up what had happened or not, Hazel did.

"Why were you sitting beside Kouji?" she asked me.

All heads at the table turned to me instantly, everyone suddenly going serious.

"What?" Tai's face was suddenly dead serious.

"He transferred into our class," I explained. "He just walked in and sat beside me. I didn't know what to do."

All eyes were on me as if they expected me to continue. Eventually they realized that I wasn't going to and Mimi spoke.

"Did he say anything to you?"

"Did he touch you?" Tai asked at the same time.

I didn't really want to answer Tai's question, and I didn't know what to say to Mimi's, so I was relieved when Akira cut in.

"It doesn't matter. Obviously if that idiot's got the balls to approach him even after we beat him up, he's planning on trying something sooner or later."

Tai nodded. "You're right, but what are we supposed to do? Kicking his ass obviously didn't work."

"We need him to disappear," Akira said.

"Unfortunately for us, human beings don't just disappear off the face of the earth when you want them to," Tai pointed out.

"Sit beside me from now on," Hazel told me. "Kim won't mind. Even if I don't get there before you, I'll make sure he doesn't sit beside you. Maybe he'll give up after awhile."

"I don't think he'll ever learn," Mimi said, shaking her head.

"Come to my place after school," Tai instructed me. "If you learn how to fight him, maybe he'll leave you alone."

I looked at him skeptically. "You're gonna try to teach me how to fight?"

"Got any better ideas?"

I didn't, so I agreed. The subject was conveniently dropped when the teacher began walking around to hand out art supplies.

I went home with Tai after school and he immediately began trying to coach me on fighting. It didn't go very well.

"Okay," Tai said. "If Kouji so much as touches you, you've gotta know how to defend yourself since Akira and I won't always be there." Tai took a hold of my wrist. "If you apply enough pressure with this, you can break someone's wrist. I'm obviously not gonna actually break your wrist, but if you do this harder..." Tai performed some sort of maneuver gently. "...you should be able to put that wrist out of commission."

Tai showed me a couple more times and got me to practice on his wrist. I barely used any force, afraid that I'd accidentally injure him. Tai said that as long as I got the gist of it, I'd be fine. He went on to show me some other helpful maneuvers that I could use against Kouji. He also showed me some defensive moves in case Kouji attacked me and I just needed to get away.

"I'm gonna pretend to be Kouji," Tai said. "When I go to hit you, do the things I just showed you. Ready?"

I nodded, and Tai swung his fist at me. Unfortunately I was too slow in defending myself.

"Shit!" Tai cradled the side of my face with his hand. "Fuck... Yama, are you okay?"

Wordlessly, I got up and headed to the bathroom. Tai followed me, cringing when I spat out some blood in the sink.

"Shit, I'm sorry, baby..." Tai led me to the kitchen and got some ice to put on my face. "I'm such an idiot."

"Not your fault." I held the ice to the side of my face, trying to ignore the taste of blood in my mouth.

"Yes it is. I shouldn't have been using enough force to hurt you." Tai looked so guilty that I took off the ice for a moment to press a light kiss to his lips, despite the throbbing in my cheek.

"I'll be fine." I repositioned the ice.

Tai didn't attempt to show me anything else after that, since he didn't want to risk hurting me again. By the time I left, the side of my face was numb from the ice and a bruise had begun to form. Tai had apologized countless times although I assured him that I wasn't angry and that I would be fine.

The next day, I sat down in Math class and was instantly questioned by Mimi and her friends.

"What happened to you?" Mimi exclaimed, and I could tell she thought it was Kouji.

"Did you get into a fight?" Karen asked me.

I shook my head. "Tai hit me. By accident," I quickly added in case they took it as something else.

"How did he accidentally hit you?" Opal asked. "Were you two playfighting?"

"Something like that."

I could tell they wanted to ask more questions, but they didn't. No doubt there would be a few speculative rumors in their circle by the end of the day.

Hazel sat beside me in second period as promised. Kouji narrowed his eyes at me from across the class when he saw me with her, but luckily didn't confront me. He sat in the back row by himself and I felt his eyes on me many times during class.

In Art, Tai cleared up what had happened. Mimi and Hazel had already heard it from me and Akira from Tai, but Tai couldn't stop apologizing for it. Every time attention was brought to my bruise, he felt it necessary to apologize again.

The last of the questions came at lunch. We passed it off as a story about us playfighting and Tai hitting me too hard. As far as I know, people believed it. Tai was a bit worried about being thought of as an abusive boyfriend or something, but I laughed at the idea. First of all, most people didn't even know we were going out. Second, Tai was making such a big deal over it that anyone would be able to tell he hadn't done it on purpose.

It was Thursday when Kouji made his first attempt at attacking me. He followed me out of class after World Religions and took a firm grip of my arm with one hand, dragging me into the nearest bathroom. With the other hand, he covered my mouth. There was a lot of commotion in the halls since it was between classes, so no one paid any attention to us.

"Turning to a girl for help to escape me." Kouji snorted. "You really are a helpless little bitch, aren't you?"

Then he seemed to notice the bruise on my cheek.

"What's this?" He smirked. "Trouble in paradise?"

I opened my mouth to retort, but he didn't give me a chance. Kouji kneed me in the gut, making me double over. Luckily, though, I managed to recover enough to slam my knee up into his groin. Kouji let out a yelp and took a few staggered steps backwards, which allowed me to escape.

I got to Art class late, apologized to the teacher, then told the group at my table what had happened. Tai was proud that I'd gotten away, but still pissed that Kouji had tried something in the first place. Hazel said she'd keep an eye on Kouji and help prevent it from happening again after class by making sure we walked together to Art from then on.

On Friday in Art class Tai and I had a little "lover's spat", as Mimi so fondly called it. It began when Akira expressed his opinion on relationships.

"The only thing a relationship is good for is sex," he declared.

Hazel slapped him on the shoulder. "You're such an ass."

"This is why you'll never have a relationship," Mimi added.

"You just don't get it because you're girls." Akira turned to Tai and I. "Come on, tell me sex isn't the major motivation of a relationship."

At the same time I said "no", Tai said "yeah". Tai seemed to realize he'd said something wrong, because he rushed to explain at the look I gave him.

"I mean, only if... you know... you've gotta care about the person. It's not just about sex, it's just that... sex is a big factor." Tai awaited my reaction.

"...so you're saying all I'm good for is sex." I wasn't pleased.

"No, that's not what I meant!" Tai glared at Akira, as if it was all his fault. "I'm just saying that sex is a nice benefit. Relationships would be boring without it."

Mimi and Hazel shook their heads, and Tai opened his mouth to correct himself. I didn't give him the chance.

"If you feel that way, then maybe I should find someone who thinks differently so you can go build more 'relationships'"-I said this sarcastically-"and fuck any attractive person you see."

"Oh, c'mon, Yama, you know I didn't mean it that way-"

"How am I supposed to know that? This whole relationship started out because of sex! It's what you've been trying to get since day one!"

"That's not true! Well... I mean, it kinda is, but not really-"

"Don't bother." I folded my arms stubbornly.

Tai groaned. "Akira, keep your opinions to yourself from now on."

**xXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx**

I thought about that for the rest of that pereiod and truly began to believe that Tai only wanted sex from me. It made sense- I mean, he'd given me a blowjob way before we even considered dating plus we had sex before he asked me out. So what reason did I have to believe he wanted anything more?

Once my initial irritation wore off, I realized I had several reasons to believe that he wanted more. If Tai only wanted sex, he wouldn't have asked me out at all- especially since he'd gotten sex from me without asking me out in the first place. Plus he obviously did care about me, at least somewhat, because he'd taken so much time and effort to help me out when I'd just moved to Kukachi... not to mention he was trying to protect me from Kouji and just taking care of me in general.

...okay, so I'd overreacted. **Way** overreacted. Especially since, on every occasion we'd done anything sexual, I'd wanted it just as badly as him.

It was during lunch as I was outside getting some fresh air when I came to this conclusion. Upon realizing that I'd gotten mad over nothing, I decided to go back inside and make up with Tai. I had just entered the building when someone tapped me on the shoulder.

I turned around and was met with a punch to the face. The force made me stumble and I lost my balance, falling to the ground. Kouji hauled me up by my shirt and punched me again, this time in the same spot Tai had hit me. I hissed in pain and then tried to perform one of the moves Tai had shown me. It didn't work.

Kouji knew he couldn't just beat me up in the halls and, unfortunately, there was a bathroom "conveniently" (note the sarcasm) located nearby, and that was where he resumed his assault.

I felt like my jaw was going to break if Kouji hit me one more time. His intentions had warped, though, and now he had me up against the wall and was forcing himself onto me. I had a flash of deja-vu and felt sick to my stomach. If it wasn't for Kouji's strength, I might've successfully gotten him off of me based on my franticness alone. But I didn't have enough practice with the maneuvers Tai had shown me, and I wasn't nearly as strong as Kouji.

Kouji was about to stick a hand down my pants when he was torn off of me, much to my relief. I saw an enraged Tai throw Kouji into one of the bathroom stalls and proceed in giving him a fair beating. Then Tai came up to me and cupped my face with his hands, looking concerned even through his anger.

"Are you okay?"

I nodded and he put his arms around me in a hug. I accepted his hug gratefully, clutching his shirt and keeping him close to me. Suddenly I felt even worse for accusing him of just wanting me for sex. He obviously cared about me a lot and if he wasn't around, I probably would have already been raped by Kouji. I shuddered at just the thought.

Tai pulled back a bit to speak. "Hazel said she saw you around here, then Kouji too... God, I'm glad I got here in time. I'm sorry I said that stuff earlier, I didn't mean it the way it sounded."

I shook my head. "No... I was just picking a fight over nothing. I'm sorry. I know you don't think that. I..."

_I love you._ It was on the tip of my tongue, but I held it back. First of all, I didn't know if I really meant it or was just overexaggerating my feelings and second of all, it kind of scared me that I might be in love. Instead, I leaned forward and pressed a kiss to his lips.

I broke away when I saw Kouji struggling to his feet out of the corner of my eye. He pointed at me, narrowing his eyes.

"I'm not done with you yet," he threatened me.

Tai glared at him darkly. "Touch him and die."

Kouji sneered at us both, then left the bathroom. I had to wonder why he couldn't just give up; it really wasn't worth it.

Some people never learn their lessons. Saturday evening, Akira, Tai and I were out for a walk. It had just gotten dark a short time earlier and I'd been over at Tai's house when Akira had spontaneously come over and suggested going for a walk. It was pretty cold out, but that didn't stop us.

We went to a nearby park and sat on the swings, just talking and enjoying the night. I was thoroughly relaxed and content... until Kouji showed up.

He wasn't completely stupid; he'd brought a few guys with him. Four of them, actually. They came up behind us and we turned when we heard the sand shift.

Once we saw Kouji and the group he had with him, we quickly abandoned the swings. Tai stepped in front of me protectively and Kouji laughed.

"Do you really think you can fight all of us?" He shook his head with a snort.

"Leave Yamato the fuck alone," Tai ordered. "It's me you have a problem with, not him."

"Not necessarily. You see, if I can't have you, then no one can. Which means that Blondie here has to go."

That was apparently the cue for his guys to attack, because they did. Kouji just stood back and watched as two of the guys fought Akira and Tai while the other two held me "hostage".

Akira and Tai had the upper hand against the guys, but it was still quite a fair fight. Kouji signaled one of the guys holding me and he let me go, joining the fight. Akira had fought off his guy for the time being and Tai was in the process of fighting off the other, but the third one attacked Tai as soon as he'd beaten up the other guy. Kouji wasn't paying attention to this, having complete confidence in his guys. He walked over to me and the fourth guy went to fight also, leaving Kouji alone with me.

"Poor little Blondie." Kouji took a step towards me and I took one back. "All alone with no defenses. It looks like Tai can't save you this time."

Kouji reached towards me, then suddenly stopped. His face drained of color and his eyes went blank. He made a strangled, choking noise and fell to the floor. I saw a puddle of blood forming around him and looked up with wide eyes. Akira stood there with a pocket knife in his hand.

I felt the urge to throw up, but my body wouldn't let me- I could barely breathe. I just stood there, frozen. All motion ceased and Kouji's guys suddenly didn't look so tough anymore.

A scream sounded somewhere behind us, but it barely phased me. I couldn't move from where I stood. I couldn't even feel my limbs. I must've stood there for some time because the next thing I knew, the sound of police sirens was nearing. Apparently the witness I'd heard screaming had called the cops... and for obvious reason.

I knew Tai and Akira were both shouting but I didn't know what they were saying or if they were even talking to me. Tai grabbed my arm and began running, dragging me along with him. My feet were moving as fast as they could carry me, but my mind still wasn't functioning properly. We reached a fence and Tai hopped it, then stopped when he realized that I was just standing there. Cursing, he came back over and yelled at me to get moving. He helped me over the fence and then broke into a sprint. My lower body was working itself, somehow keeping up with Tai. If it were up to my mind and the state it was in, I wouldn't even be able to walk.

We didn't stop until we'd gone a number of blocks and reached a "safe spot" in a back path. I fell to my knees on a patch of grass beside the path and burst into hysterics, shaking and hyperventilating. It wasn't long before tears were rolling down my face, more from how ovewhelmed I was than anything else, and Tai held me tightly. I clawed at his shirt, tugging him closer and burying myself in his chest. We both knew that this wasn't the end of our problems.

**xXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx**

I couldn't even think of sleeping that night. Tai and I laid awake in his bed, me with tear-stained cheeks and red eyes. Every so often I would start crying again, softly, and Tai wouldn't say anything but I knew he was awake and that he heard me. Images flashed in my head: the unbelievably large pool of blood, Kouji's lifeless body on the floor, and the look that flashed across Akira's face. He'd known he wouldn't get away.

Kari was the one that called us out to the living room the next morning. She pointed to the TV when we approached and we looked at the screen.

_"...Ms. Hannah Jonese called in late last night to report a gang fight near her house. When police arrived at the scene of the crime, Kouji Nakamura's body was found dead. Police suspect that other partners in crime fled the scene, but three suspects were captured: Ian Lewis, Neil Thompson, and Akira Naguri. Naguri was charged with first-degree murder and sent to juvenile hall for the time being, while Lewis and Thompson were returned to their families after Naguri confessed to committing the crime."_

We both knew that Akira would never reveal our names to the police. I recalled a story Tai had told me about one time when they were younger and had egged a house on Halloween. They'd split up and ran in two different direction and Akira got caught. When questioned, he took all the blame. Tai said that as long as he'd known Akira, he'd never ratted anyone out for anything.

Kari looked at us wordlessly and neither of us said anything. The phone rang, breaking the silence, and she picked it up numbly, answering in a dull tone.

I could hear Mikomi's voice from the other line, frantic and high-pitched. It would have been funny if the situation wasn't so serious. After Mikomi, Mimi called and then a dozen other people after them. Tai refused to speak with any of them; he didn't want to talk about it and I didn't blame him. Sensing that he might want to be alone for a while, I headed home and spent the rest of the day in a daze. I could only imagine what people would be saying on Monday.

And it was all my fault.

**xXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx**


	9. Waking Up to a Nightmare

A/N: If I sound ignorant about the whole Akira in juvenile hall situation, it's because I am. It's quite hard to find information about these kinds of things.

DISCLAIMER: I don't own Digimon or rights to any of the characters, I am not making a profit from this, etc.

**Kukachi  
VIII: Waking Up to a Nightmare  
**by: neo-chan

The rumors were vicious and spreading like a plague. Tai didn't come to school on Monday, so people saw me as the next best source and bombarded me with questions. Luckily the few people who knew what had **really** happened popped out of nowhere, came to my rescue, and snatched me away so that I didn't have to face anyone.

I didn't hear from Tai at all on Monday and Tuesday. On Wednesday he came to school halfway through lunch. Needless to say, he was surrounded by curious people who wouldn't shut up. Luckily Tai, Mimi, Hazel, and I managed to escape and went for a walk.

Everyone was silent for about five minutes. Then Hazel spoke.

"Well? What's the news?"

Tai took a few moments before answering. "Kouji's guys admitted it was an act of self-defense."

"So?"

"So he's gonna be let out."

Mimi and Hazel looked relieved. I was relieved also, but I knew Akira couldn't be getting off scott-free.

"When will he be out?" Mimi asked.

"I don't know. They've gotta settle some legal shit in first."

"How did you get all this information?" I asked him.

"I have my sources." Tai dismissed the question.

"Have you talked to him?" Hazel asked.

Tai shook his head. "I was thinking about going after school today." He looked at me when he said this.

Tai left again after lunch, but when I went to my locker after school he was waiting for me. We took the subway to our destination and the whole ride was pretty silent. I felt both awkward and nervous as we entered the building where Akira was being held but luckily, Tai seemed to know what he was doing. There was a large, heavy-set man sitting at a desk and Tai walked right up, me trailing timidly behind him.

"Can we see Akira Naguri?" he asked the man sitting there.

The man eyed us for a moment, then spoke. "You related to him?"

"Yes," Tai lied easily.

The man looked like he really didn't care. He nodded and stood, not bothering to inquire further. He began walking down a hall and after a moment we assumed he meant for us to follow. He led us down a few more hallways and eventually stopped at a cell. Akira was inside, looking bored to death and quite irritated. The man started down the hallway again, leaving us alone outside of Akira's cell. Apparently the security wasn't so great. I had to wonder if they would even notice if we broke into Akira's cell and walked out of the place with him.

"How's it going?" Tai spoke.

Akira looked up and snorted. "You kidding?"

Tai chuckled lightly. Akira got off of the bed he was sitting on and walked over to the bars.

"Supposedly they already know what the outcome is gonna be, but they still have to go through all this legal crap... and they're taking their time. It's fucking stupid." He shook his head.

"What's the outcome gonna be?" Tai asked.

"I've gotta do fucking community service hours or some shit like that, and the police are gonna be watching me. Oh, and the best part; they want me to go see a shrink or something." Akira gave a half-laugh, half-snort.

"Sounds like fun."

"Yeah." Akira turned to me. "Well, at least he's not gonna bother you anymore. You okay?"

I nodded. "Yeah..." I didn't know how to say thank you without sounding completely stupid. And, on second thought, it was horrible to say thank-you for killing someone!

"Good." Akira turned back to Tai. "How are the girls?"

"Alright. Mikomi's a bit freaked and worried... she'll want to see you as soon as you come out. She was kind of scared when she found out, but yeah. Kari's gonna wanna see you the moment you step out too, you know that. And Yama and I will tell Mimi and Hazel you're okay."

Akira nodded. "I should be out of here soon... if I'm not, I'll fucking go insane. Which wouldn't help. See you guys whenever."

We said goodbye and left. The men at the front desk barely acknowledged our leaving. Tai and I hopped on the subway again and ended up at my place. He stayed for a couple minutes, then headed home.

The visit to Akira and the whole Kouji situation (or ex-situation) plagued my mind. I had witnessed a murder. Not only had I witnessed it, I was the cause for it. It was just so unreal. Plus I felt terrible for Akira- his record would be seriously and permanently damaged because of me.

I had succeeded in exhausting my brain shortly and went to bed earlier than usual because I didn't feel well in any sense. I thought sleeping would make things all better, at least until morning. However, that wasn't the case.

**xXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx**

Kouji reached towards me, then suddenly stopped. Blood began dripping down his face and pouring out of his palms. I nearly gagged and stifled a scream. Kouji made an odd noise and fell to the floor. I saw a puddle of blood forming around him and looked up with wide eyes. Akira stood there with a knife in his hand.

The blood was spreading rapidly, and it reached my feet. I screamed and tried to run but Kouji's arm suddenly reached out and grabbed me. Akira and Tai ran to me-Akira was wearing a jail uniform-but they sank into the blood as if it were quicksand. The police were watching, surrounding us. I slowly sank into the ground as well, screaming as I heard the sound of a heartbeat slowly fading...

**xXxXxXxXx**

I woke up with a gasp. My chest was heaving and I had broken out into a cold sweat. The shadows in my room suddenly seemed threatening and I scrambled to turn on my lamp. Sitting there in my bed, I wrapped my covers around me and covered my ears. I was afraid of hearing a heartbeat.

I got out of bed and quickly found my discman, then brought it to bed with me and shoved the headphones over my ears. I pressed play and was relieved to hear something other than silence. Laying down, I left the lamp on. I didn't want to sleep, but what else could I do? Tai wouldn't be up at such an hour and I didn't want to disturb him or his family by calling. I was scared to dream about the same thing again, though, so I decided to try and stay awake.

My body decided it didn't agree with me and I fell asleep quicker than I thought I would. I either didn't have the dream again or just didn't remember having it, but I still woke up feeling afraid and shivering. I turned some music on again as I got ready for school, not liking the silence I was surrounded by. The stupid nightmare kept coming back to me and I found myself hurrying to get ready so I could get out into the fresh air.

I nearly had a heart attack when my doorbell rang. At first I didn't want to go answer the door, but I knew I had to. I walked to the front door dreadfully and pulled it open, bracing myself. Relief washed over me when I saw Tai and realized just how crazy I was being.

"Are you okay?" Tai asked me, cocking his head.

I nodded. "Yeah, just... nothing." If I told him about my nightmares, he'd get worried. Besides, I didn't want to talk about it.

The nightmare hovered in the back of my mind as Tai and I walked to school. He kept giving me looks like he knew something was going on, but luckily he didn't ask about it.

When we saw Mimi and Hazel, they immediately asked about Akira. Tai replied with "He's fine. Pissed off, but fine." And that was that.

I couldn't concentrate in class. I was trying my best not to think about the nightmare or the event that had caused it, but my mind kept wandering back to it.

_Deal with it,_ I told myself in art class as someone walked around handing something out. _It's not gonna go away. You're being ridiculous. And besides, people will notice and think you're insane._

I was jolted out of my thoughts-well, more like scared shitless out of them-when something was placed on my desk. I looked down and nearly screamed at the sight. Luckily I didn't scream but I did push my chair back a bit and let out a little gasp. Tai, Mimi, and Hazel all looked at me in confusion, but I was too busy staring down with wide eyes.

The teacher began speaking. "As you probably know, this is an illustration for the famous poem 'A Telltale Heart' by Edgar Allen Poe. We'll be reading the poem and analyzing this drawing for a portion of this class. Would anyone like to begin reading?"

There was no way I could sit there and listen to it. No way.

I assume someone raised their hand and she called on them, because a voice began reading the poem. I suddenly felt sick to my stomach. I wanted to cover my ears and scream to block it out but that wouldn't go over very well.

I looked at Tai, who only seemed to be half-listening. Looking at him only made it worse, though, because I began to have flashbacks to the incident. Throat feeling dry, I tried to block out the reader but it didn't work.

_Kouji reached towards me, then suddenly stopped. His face drained of color and his eyes went dull._

I shuddered, trying to force the thought out of my head. _Think of something else!_ I screamed at myself.

_He made a strangled, choking noise and fell to the floor._

Nothing was working. I was beginning to feel panicked. I felt hot and cold at the same time, and my pulse had sped up significantly. I couldn't sit there and listen to the poem... I couldn't. But what was I supposed to do?

_I saw a puddle of blood forming around him and looked up with wide eyes. Akira stood there with a pocket knife in his hand._

Oh my God.

_...puddle of blood... pocket knife..._

"Matt?"

I jumped, head snapping to face the direction of the voice. Tai was looking at me, concerned, and I realized that the whole class was staring at me. Tai frowned and then stood up, tugging me with him.

"I'll take him to the nurse's office," he volunteered.

Our teacher nodded and Tai escorted me out of the room. Once we were outside, he put an arm around me and looked me in the eye, speaking.

"What's wrong?"

I shook my head wordlessly, not wanting to talk about it.

"Yama, come on. You're all pale and you look like you just saw a ghost."

"Close enough," I said, voice coming out in nearly a whisper.

Tai seemed like he wanted to ask more questions, but held them back for the time being. He took me downstairs to the office and luckily we were allowed to sign out. When we got to my place, Tai laid me down in bed and then settled himself beside me, telling me to get some rest. I protested, afraid of sleeping, but I was so tired that I fell asleep anyway.

**xXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx**

"Poor little Blondie." Kouji took a step towards me and I took one back. "All alone with no defenses. It looks like Tai can't save you this time."

Kouji reached towards me, then suddenly stopped. His face drained of color and his eyes went dull. He made a strangled, choking noise and fell to the floor. I saw a puddle of blood forming around him and looked up with wide eyes. Akira stood there with a pocket knife in his hand.

**xXxXxXxXx**

I awoke with a start and felt like I was going to vomit. Luckily I didn't, but Tai was still beside me and he looked extremely concerned.

"Yama, tell me what's wrong," he said seriously. "You had this terrified look on your face while you were sleeping, and even more so just now when you woke up. Did you have a bad dream?"

"It's Kouji," I said shakily.

"Kouji? Baby, he can't bother you anymore-"

"I know! That's what it is! I had a nightmare about it last night, about all of this... about Saturday. It was so bad, Tai... it started out as what really happened and then... and then it got worse, and then today in art class we were reading that poem and, fuck, I just want it to go away..." I was crying by that point.

Tai took me into his arms, pressing a kiss to the top of my head. He rubbed my back comfortingly and stroked my hair, silent for a few moments. I don't think he knew what to say at first, but eventually he spoke.

"It's over, Yama. There's nothing you or I, or Akira, can do. It happened, and that's it. If you feel guilty, don't. Think of all the things he did. You have to put it behind you."

"I know," I said shakily, wiping my eyes, "but I just... I can't get the pictures out of my head..."

"Yama, look at me."

I took a deep breath and looked up, meeting Tai's eyes. He spoke, sounding firm but gentle at the same time.

"I know this isn't what you want to hear right now, and it's gonna sound harsh, but... suck it up. None of us planned on this happening. Akira's got it on his permanent record now, killing someone. That's not good. And I understand that seeing it happen might have traumatized you in some way- that's not unusual. But you're going to have to deal with it. There's nothing I can do to make it go away or I would, trust me. You just have to push yourself past this. I'm not trying to be mean, I'm just stating the facts."

It didn't make me feel any better, but he was right. I knew I would have to just try to let it go, but it would haunt me for long before that could happen. And every time I saw Akira or Tai, or any other reminder, it would just bring the images back.

"All you can do is not let this take over your life," Tai concluded. "Make an effort, y'know? We're all gonna be a bit thrown off for a while, but we don't need to let it overtake us."

I understood what Tai was saying, but it was going to be hard to get my thoughts off of the whole subject once it came to mind. He was right, though, I didn't want it to take over my life.

"Say something, baby," Tai prompted with a little nudge.

I closed my eyes and sighed, then opened them again after a moment and nodded.

"Yeah... you're right. But... I mean, I'm gonna need help."

"Of course. Don't worry, I'm always here." Tai gave me a soft kiss, then paused and offered a small grin. "Now, what do you say I help take your mind off of all this?"

I just looked at him for a long moment. Then, slowly, I shook my head.

"How can you think about sex right now? Why are you so calm about all of this? Doesn't it bother you that we fucking **killed** someone, Tai?"

"I'd love to say it does, Yama, and I hate the fact that it's affecting you like this, but how can I feel guilty for killing him when he nearly raped you? Kouji deserved to die."

"That's not for us to judge-"

"Well, he's dead and that's that! We can't change the past, and I can't say I regret it. If anyone else ever fucking dares to try and rape you, I'll kill them too. And I won't feel bad about it."

I gaped at Tai in disbelief. "How can you say that?"

"Very easily, actually! Why is this so hard for you to understand? I'm not going to just let someone do this shit to you without being punished for it!" Tai paused and shook his head, lowering his voice. "This is stupid... don't fight me on this, Yama, it's not gonna change the way I feel."

"You can't justify killing someone. Even if they were a complete asshole."

"And I can't help not feeling bad about it. So this fight is pointless."

I sighed, knowing that fighting wouldn't solve anything, and Tai raised an eyebrow.

"Kiss?"

I nodded and met his lips with mine, then smiled in spite of myself.

"Still want me here?" Tai asked.

"Yeah."

"Good, 'cause I wasn't planning on leaving."

Tai stayed by my side for the whole day, then insisted on sleeping over because of the nightmares I'd had. Luckily my dad didn't protest to this; he hadn't really tried to stop me from doing anything since he and my mom had split up.

I didn't want to sleep. In fact, I laid there in bed that night for a long while, willing myself awake whenever I felt myself drifting off to sleep. Eventually Tai got fed up.

"Yamaa," he half-whined, sounding annoyed, "you're keeping me up. We're gonna be fucking tired tomorrow."

I lifted my head from Tai's chest. "How am I keeping you up?"

"I can't sleep if you don't!"

"Well, I can't sleep because I don't want to have nightmares!"

Tai sighed and tugged me up to the same level with him, then planted a kiss on my lips.

"You have to sleep eventually. And I can't promise you won't have nightmares, but if you do I'll be here to comfort you when you wake up."

I pressed my lips to his in another kiss, which he gave me, then sighed.

"...okay." I rested my head back on his chest, curling up against his side. "Good night, Tai."

"Night, Yama. Sweet dreams."

**xXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx**

Surprisingly, I didn't have any dreams whatsoever- or any I remembered. When I woke up, Tai was already awake and he smiled at me.

"Sleep well?"

I nodded and leaned in for a kiss.

Only, at the last second, I realized it wasn't Tai. I shrieked and jumped out of bed when I saw a gruesome, rotting face staring back at me.

Kouji-or rather, the dead corpse of Kouji-laughed at me. He stood up on the bed and pulled out the same knife Akira had used.

"I think I should return this."

He drew his hand back and then-

**xXxXxXxXx**

My eyes shot open and I tried to catch my breath, feeling my whole body shaking. I wanted to wake Tai up, but what if the dream really hadn't ended and it happened again?

"Tai," I whispered lightly, biting my lip nervously.

He remained asleep.

"Tai," I said louder, gripping his shoulder and panicking slightly.

Tai stirred and his eyes opened. He looked at me for a moment in a sleepy haze, then seemed to come to his senses.

"Nightmare?"

I nodded.

Tai pulled me into an embrace, kissing my forehead.

"Do you wanna tell me about it?" he asked.

"No." I changed my mind. "Yes. It was so... God, it was... I thought it was morning, and I woke up and you were awake too but then you turned into Kouji and... he tried to kill me..."

"I'm so sorry," Tai murmured, rubbing my back soothingly. "Are you okay?"

"No," I choked out, trying to hold back tears.

Tai glanced at my bedside clock. "It's 5AM, Yama. Do you wanna try going back to sleep?"

"No," I said immediately.

"You wanna stay up?"

"Yes."

"You're gonna be really tired in the morning."

"I know."

Tai sighed. "Alright." He sat up, pulling me with him, and reached for the remote. Putting an arm around my shoulder and squeezing, he turned on the TV.

I looked up at him quizzically. "You're staying up with me?"

"Mmhm."

I felt a spark of warmth inside of me and nuzzled my head into Tai's neck. "Thank you."

He ruffled my hair and kissed my forehead in response.

**xXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx**

We managed to stay up the whole time, and as a result were extremely tired the next day. Our exhaustion got worse as the day went on, and I wanted to just collapse in bed when I got home after school. But, of course, I didn't; sleeping would mean having potential nightmares. So I forced myself to stay awake for as long as possible.

When my dad got home that evening- later than usual, I noticed- he looked sort of grim. I asked him what was wrong and he sat down in the living room with me. That's how I knew it was serious.

"Yamato, I'm sure you knew that we adults were going to get together to discuss the situation with Takeru."

I nodded.

"Well, we've been discussing it for the past while. Daron and Catherine want Takeru to be happy- plus Daron feels guilty for what he did-, so they've agreed to let him go. Since Takeru has already bonded somewhat with you, we'd planned for him to move in with you and I. Of course, he would periodically get to see your mother, plus he would be close to Daron and Catherine when he wanted to see them. However..." My dad paused and shook his head. "...your mother has decided to try and gain custody of your brother."

My eyes widened. "What?"

"Truthfully, Yamato, I'll confide in you; I think part of the reason she's doing it is because she' still angry with me. However, that's no reason to spite you. It isn't fair to you or Takeru. He's spent more time with you and I, and it's already going to be hard for him leaving Daron and Catherine. Going to live with your mother and Amaya isn't what he wants. Unfortunately I think she'll win the case, simply because she is his biological mother."

"But Dad, that's not fair!" I cried.

"I know," my father said with a sigh. "I think she's been toying with the idea of trying to get custody of you, too, especially because her side of the family will make sure she's taken care of financially and she knows she'll be able to support you. I wouldn't be surprised if she tried."

"But that's... it's..." I was speechless.

"I know." My dad tried to force a smile. "We can hope otherwise, however. She might not win the case."

I nodded and agreed with my dad half-heartedly. Deep down, I knew the chances of that were extremely slim.

TK called me later that evening to tell me the same thing my father had. He was very upset about it, and I began to breed a dislike for my mother. Didn't she care how TK and I felt? I asked TK if he'd even met my mother yet, and he said he had once. That was nothing compared to the several times he'd seen my dad, not to mention the time he'd spent with me! How could my mother break a bond like that, only to spite my father?

It was both our mother and our father's faults that things got so far; they shouldn't have hidden their problems like they had. Everything could have ran a lot smoother if they'd just gotten a divorce instead of trying to keep living together when they couldn't get along. Then they could've at least tried to be friends. But, still, that was no reason for my mother to be so hostile. I knew that if the roles were reversed, my father never would have done something like what she was doing.

That night, I was so focused on the new issue that I had dreamless sleep. When I woke up Saturday morning, I was glad and almost forgot the whole reason I'd been too busy to have nightmares. Then it came back to me and I called TK, if only to let him release more of his frustration. He ended up coming over and spending the day with me. He, my dad, and I had dinner together and TK told my dad directly that he didn't want to live with my mother; he wanted to live with us. My dad told TK to make that clear to our mother and to the courts.

Tai phoned to check up on me-and to tell me that Akira had been let out-and I informed him of the situation. He had the same reaction as I'd had, and I told him that I'd fill him in as things went along. On Sunday, my mother was scheduled to visit TK and I planned to show up and tell her my opinion. I didn't know if she would listen, but it was worth a try. After all, why would she intentionally hurt her sons?

When Sunday came around, TK and I both stressed to our mother how much we didn't want to be torn apart and how much TK didn't want to leave Kukachi. She replied that if we really didn't want to be torn apart, she could take me also. I explained that I didn't want to leave Kukachi either, not to mention I didn't want to leave my father. My mother said that she didn't understand why, and of course I couldn't tell her that I didn't want to leave Kukachi because of Tai. TK, however, made the mistake of telling her about Daisuke. That was when I found out that my mother was, indeed, something of a homophobe and that just fueled her even more in wanting custody of him. She declared that Kukachi was "corrupting his mind" and that he needed to settle down in Rihtona with a "nice young lady".

My mother asked me to baby-sit Amaya the upcoming Friday and of course I accepted. I couldn't turn down baby-sitting my little cousin, plus this might be one of the last times I got to see her for a long time. Even if my mother didn't gain custody of TK, she still planned to move back to Rihtona with Amaya.

Akira was swarmed with attention when he returned to school on Monday and most of it was unwanted. He had to do community service hours every Saturday, which pissed him off, plus see a psychiatrist- which pissed him off ten times more. However, after his first appointment, he laughed his ass off and told us how much fun he'd had messing with the shrink's mind and making him nervous.

My nightmares returned on Wednesday and Thursday of the next week. On Friday I convinced my mother to drop Amaya off at mine and my dad's apartment instead of me going over there, and once I put Amaya to sleep I called Tai and invited him over. I would need someone to comfort me if I had another nightmare, especially because I didn't want Amaya to see me scared.

Tai came over with his stuff and we watched TV quietly in my room. The door was half-shut so that the sound wouldn't carry so much, but so that I would hear Amaya if she woke up and called me.

"Dai's really upset over this, too," Tai told me. "TK told him about the whole situation and I know he'll be really depressed if TK leaves. I don't understand people who have problems with different sexual orientations. So what if a guy likes another guy? It's still the same feeling that a girl and a guy would have."

I decided not to remind Tai that I used to be one of those people- not homophobic, technically, but someone who had grown up with the belief that "like" and "love" were for a boy and a girl and no one else.

Instead of bringing this up, I kissed Tai; I didn't really want the conversation to continue and it was a surefire way of shutting him up. Sure enough, Tai kissed me back and before I knew it, we were making out.

Tai's hand was up the back of my shirt and we were kissing deeply with Tai on top of me when I heard a creak. Startled, I turned my head towards the doorway to find Amaya standing there watching.

My eyes widened and I pushed Tai off of me. He flashed me an apologetic look and I nodded briefly at him before addressing Amaya.

"What's wrong?" I asked her, hoping I sounded normal. "Can't sleep?"

She ignored my question completely. "What are you doing?"

"Watching TV," I answered, trying to keep a light tone.

"But why was he on top of you?" Amaya asked, pointing to Tai. "And why were you doing that kissy stuff?"

I felt my cheeks heating up and cleared my throat. "Um... well, uh..."

"I was on top of him because we were play-wrestling," Tai lied. A lame excuse, but a six year-old might believe it and let it go.

"But why were you doing kissy stuff?"

I swallowed a lump in my throat and spoke. "Um..." I sighed, not able to come up with an alibi. "Listen, 'Maya, when two people care about each other... they kiss."

"Why?"

"To express their feelings and to let each other know how they feel."

"Are you married to him?" Amaya once again pointed at Tai.

I knew my face must be red. "Um, no... you don't have to be married to kiss, 'Maya."

"Oh."

"Why are you up?" I attempted again.

"I'm thirsty."

"Okay."

I got up and took Amaya to the kitchen to get her a glass of water, then tucked her back in bed afterwards and said goodnight. When I returned to my room, Tai looked at me guiltily.

"Sorry."

"It's not your fault." I sat down beside him and sighed, then shook my head. "God, that was embarrassing."

"Do you think she'll tell your mom?"

I hadn't even considered it. "No," I said after thinking about it. "It shouldn't come up. And if it ever does, it'll probably be too late for my mom to do anything about it."

"I hope so." Tai pulled me in for a quick kiss.

No nightmares plagued me, and Tai left the next morning before my mom showed up to get Amaya. My mother asked me if everything had gone smoothly and I said yes, and when she asked Amaya if she'd had fun, Amaya said yes and luckily didn't mention that I'd had Tai over. I breathed a sigh of relief once they left.

I slept fine on Saturday night, and on Sunday I hung out with Tai and Akira. When I got home and entered the living room, I was met with a grave look from my father.

I stopped in my tracks, puzzled, and my father gestured to the seat across from him.

"Sit down, Yamato," he said, his voice serious as it had been when he'd informed me of my mother's decision.

I sat down, stomach sinking. "She got custody of TK, didn't she?"

My father shook his head. "No. Not yet, at least."

I was confused. "Then what's wrong?"

"Yamato... I wasn't aware that you had Tai over when you were babysitting for your cousin on Friday."

Uh oh.

"I didn't think it would be a problem," I said, trying not to sound nervous.

"It's not a problem; not for me, at least. Even if I didn't know that you two were..." My father coughed. "Er... involved."

My eyes widened and I felt my face get hot. "Dad, I-"

He held up a hand to silence me. "This isn't about the fact that I didn't know. It's about the fact that, apparently, Amaya saw you two kissing."

I bit my lip.

"...and somehow, it was brought up and passed on to your mother. She didn't like that very much."

Shit.

"What did she say?" I asked nervously.

"Well, there was quite a lot of yelling when she phoned me. Eventually she decided to blame it on me and told me that I wasn't a suitable parent and that she disapproved of your new values and your new lifestyle overall."

"...do **you** disapprove?" I had to ask.

My father gave me a faint smile. "I would have liked to find out about this from you and not from her but, other than that, I see no problems."

I was relieved.

"...however, it doesn't matter what I think."

I frowned. "What do you mean?"

"Yamato... your mother is now fighting to gain custody of you **and** Takeru."

**xXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx**

Of course, I couldn't blame Amaya; she was a child and didn't know any better. I blamed my own self for not being responsible and allowing her to see something like that. I also blamed my mother for being so closed-minded and unfair.

I decided not to tell Tai the situation until I knew what the outcome of the case was. After all, there was still hope and I didn't want to upset Tai unnecessarily.

So I pretended everything was fine. Tai knew something was wrong with me, but simply thought that it had to do with the possibility of TK being taken away. My nightmares began fading, averaging to once a week if even that. I think I had too much else on my mind.

Mimi threw a party on the second weekend in May. This time I actually aimed to get drunk; I needed to be rid of my stress, if only for one night. I regretted it the next day, however, when I was extremely hung over and felt horrible. Tai took care of me, though, since he'd refrained from drinking as usual.

Tai began to teach me how to drive, like he'd said he wanted to. He also tried to teach me to skateboard, which resulted in a lot of me falling and him trying not to laugh. Regardless, it kept me busy and kept my mind off of less pleasant things.

It was May eighteenth when we found out the court's decision; they'd given my mother full custody of both TK and myself.

**xXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx**

"What's wrong?" Tai asked me.

It was the Monday after I'd gotten the news, and I was walking with Akira and Tai to school. They'd noticed the cloud that seemed to hang over me already and were watching me curiously for an answer.

"I'll tell you at lunch," I answered gloomily and they left it at that.

The day seemed to go by faster than usual and soon I was in the cafeteria with three pairs of eyes watching me expectantly. Mimi, Tai, and Akira waited for me to speak, curious yet concerned.

"I told you all about my mom trying to get custody of TK," I began.

They all nodded.

"Well... what I didn't tell you is that she started trying to get custody of me, too."

All three of them began speaking at once, and I waited patiently for them to quiet down and realize that I wasn't finished. Eventually they did and I made the announcement.

"She won. She's taking us back to Rihtona."

There was silence at first, then of course the rest of the lunch period was spent talking about how unfair it was and how they were going to kidnap me and refuse to let me go. I would be sad to leave Mimi and Akira, and I knew they didn't particularly want to see me leave either, but the pain I saw in Tai's eyes was overwhelming. After school, he came home with me and we talked for a good, long while about what was happening, why it was happening, and how unfair it was. We ended up laying on my bed with our arms wrapped around each other, both of us silent and still. We stayed this way for a long time, until Tai finally spoke again.

"When are you leaving?" His voice was barely audible.

"June seventh."

"But school doesn't even end until the eighteenth!"

"I know."

"And my birthday's on the nineteenth! I don't want to celebrate my birthday without you!"

"I know."

"What about exams? How are you going to take them if you're gone?"

"She arranged for me to take them the first week of June instead."

"Why can't you guys just stay here?"

I bit my lip, struggling not to cry.

"I don't know."

**xXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx**

Everyone's mood was affected by my news. We tried to make the best out of the days we had left, but none of us could really put our hearts into it- especially Tai and I. We spent a lot of our time together in silence, just taking comfort in the presence of each other. We both had so much to say that we didn't say anything at all, and we didn't want to leave each other's sides for even a moment.

The time passed too quickly. I didn't study for my exams until the night before the Monday they were scheduled for. Studying hardly seemed important anymore when I was about to be torn away from my life for no good reason.

TK and Dai spent a lot of time together, too. I knew TK and I were going to have to draw strength from each other in order to get through the move. I'd begun to almost despise my mother, and so had TK even though he'd only just met her, and we both swore that someday we'd get back to our dad.

It was over too soon. On the Friday before I left, our friends came over to the apartment to hang out with TK and I one last time. They gave us a going-away gift; a scrapbook filled with messages from them and memories of our good times in Kukachi. Needless to say, it meant a lot to us. They'd also all included their e-mail addresses so we could keep in contact. When it came time for our friends to leave- except for Tai and Daisuke, who were staying with us for the last night-, they all lined up to say their last goodbyes.

"I can't believe you're leaving," Mimi said to me, hugging me tightly. "I swear I've never seen someone look so good in tight jeans. I'm serious," she insisted when I gave a little laugh. "And," she added in a quieter tone, "I've never seen someone make Tai as happy as you have."

"Mimi..." I hugged her again.

"I'm gonna miss you," she told me, tears in her eyes. "E-mail me. I'll call you once in a while, my parents won't mind if the bill goes up a bit every so often-"

"Mimi," I interrupted her, "thank you. So much. For everything. For helping me out when things were bad, for being my friend, for... everything. Thank you so much. I'll miss you."

She wouldn't let go of me for at least another minute and, when she finally did, it was Kari's turn.

Kari took me into a hug, smiling sadly.

"From the moment I met you, I knew you were different. You've been so great for Tai, Matt, and he cares about you so much... and I know you feel the same way. Don't hurt him, okay?"

"I won't. Thank you, Kari."

"No, thank **you**, Matt."

Mikomi was next.

"I can't believe you're going!" she sobbed, throwing her arms around my neck. "You have to come and visit! And e-mail me!" She calmed down for a moment and gave me a little smile. "How else will I tell you about my new crushes and if Akira's fallen for me yet?"

Akira was the last. He and I stood there for a few moments in silence until he spoke.

"Tai cares about you a lot," he said.

I nodded. "I know. I care about him too."

"I know. I can tell. That's when I realized..." Akira cracked a smile. "You're okay, Ishida."

I couldn't help it; I wrapped my arms around him in a hug. Akira was stiff at first, and I could feel everyone holding their breath, but then he relaxed and put his own arms around me loosely. I was grateful to Akira for so many things. I owed him my life... literally.

Once everyone had said goodbye and left reluctantly, it was just me, TK, Daisuke, and Tai. We spent a solemn night together, then said goodnight to each other around midnight and retreated to the two rooms.

I shut the door quietly behind Tai and I and turned off the lights then, before joining him on the bed, took something out of one of my not-yet-sealed, last-minute boxes. When I sat down, I saw that Tai had something for me as well.

We exchanged the gifts at the same time. Both of them were the same shape and size, and when we opened them we were both silent.

Each one of us had given the other a plain silver ring. No words needed to be exchanged; we both understood what the other had to say. Tai put the ring on his right ring finger and I did the same, then we gazed at each other for several moments after. Finally I closed the gap between us, pressing my lips to kiss in a deep kiss.

We kissed intensely and passionately, ignoring our need for oxygen and kissing until we were both ready to faint. The kissing carried into something more heavy, with meaningful touches and caresses, and our clothes were abandoned as soon as we thought to remove them. Tai pushed me onto my back and climbed on top of me, pressing our naked skin together and fusing our lips once again. Neither of us spoke a word, letting our actions speak for us.

When Tai entered me, it was as if he was becoming a part of me- a part of me that would never go away. I nearly burst into tears right then and there but managed to keep control of myself and Tai proceeded with his actions, overwhelming me with emotion and driving pleasure into the deepest, darkest parts of mind.

It was in that last moment, the second after it was over but before the pleasure began to wear off. Tai looked me in the eye and at that moment I truly believed that his eyes were the window to his soul. The emotion I saw overwhelmed me, almost scared me- partially because it was so sincere.

He spoke in a voice so soft that I had to wonder if he'd spoken at all. He spoke, and my breath caught in my chest at the words he uttered.

"I love you."

That night, as we lay wrapped in each other's arms, I thought. I thought long and hard. I hadn't said anything in response to Tai, but he hadn't looked like he was waiting for me to. I didn't know if he'd even meant to say it aloud, but I'd come to the conclusion that it had simply been something said in the heat of the moment and that Tai didn't mean it; that he couldn't have meant it. We had both been overcome with feelings, and he'd spouted those words as result of how pleasure-driven his mind had been at the time; with the strong feeling of euphoria clouding his mind, it was easy to mistake what he'd felt as love.

We didn't speak of it the next morning. We didn't speak of anything, really. We were all horribly silent as realization sunk in- it was really happening. And, finally, the moment came.

TK and I hugged my dad tightly, unable to stop the tears falling from our eyes. He himself had tears in his eyes, although I knew he wouldn't let us see them fall. He said goodbye to us and told us he would see us soon. We knew it was a lie.

TK and Dai embraced, and I did the same with Tai. We knew our mother wasn't pleased about this, but that was the least of our worries. I could feel her watching furiously, but I didn't let it stop me; I kissed Tai passionately. A long, intense kiss. When we parted, I sobbed uncontrollably into Tai's shirt. He didn't say a word, holding me silently. Although he didn't speak, I heard him anyway.

Finally we had to leave. Tai and I had agreed to try a long-distance relationship the previous night; we would e-mail each other, occasionally call each other, and try to visit each other if we could (which was highly doubtful). But as I got into my mother's car, my heart twisted and I knew that what we had was lost.

Tai, Daisuke, and my father stood in the driveway as my mother pulled away. When the three figures became specks in the distance, I finally turned around and noticed TK doing the same thing. We both looked at each other and then out the window, afraid to shed more tears.

I looked down at my hand, at the ring that Tai had given me... the last part of him I still had physically with me. Tears began to roll down my cheeks and I heard TK's own quiet sobs. Amaya was asleep in the front seat, and I was glad; I didn't want her to see us in such a state.

As we drove away from Kukachi, our spirits changed as quickly as the split-second scenery we pretended to gaze at. Deep in my heart, I knew that part of me would always remain in Kukachi and I hoped that one day, I would be back to collect it.

**xXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx**

THE END

A/N: For those who are reading this for the first time- there is a sequel to this, called Yesterday's Feelings. For those who are reading this over because it's been re-written, you've either read my profile and found out that this was re-written and I'm working on re-writing YF or you've been directed here from Yesterday's Feelings because I said that both that and this have been re-written. So... yeah. Feel free to leave me a review telling me what you think of the "new" Kukachi.


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